Would You Marry Again?

[TIGUY]

Here's a question I have always thought about. Would you marry again or would you prefer to live together without the legal document?

Many things to think about here...that legal document provides some damn expensive health benes as well as financial benes...do we want that finncial burden on someone we love by refusing to marry again? Do we want our spouse to have to work as age creeps up on us because he/she is unable to afford health benes as an individual? Then the thought of younger lovers wanting another child...or their first child.

If you want to play in this thread, you're not allowed to say, "well, I'm not getting divorced anytiime soon, or I love my spouse so I can't answer. Uh uh....then move to another thread. I'm curious as to everyone's answer as it pertains to a divorce from the man or woman you are married to right now. Let's think about what if...

This is M&FC where everybody doesn't know your name and we all fantasize to start and then take the next step...or not.

[jasonmnusa]

i can't see me ever getting married again. honestly i could see me going off the deep end and partying with a different woman each week for a while!!!! Line em up baby

[TIGUY]

Damn...an honest man!

Good answer if that's how you feel.....a marriage needs honesty, especially from the men!

[Kissie]

Believe me I would NOT marry again...this one has taken way to much out of me!!!!! Thinking I would spend some time alone...To find ME again!!!!!!

[dcowboy09]

maybe depends on the woman, she definetly would have to like sex unlike my first choice.

[OnceAKing]

TI while I'm not married presently, I can still remember when I was and when this question came to mind...not when I was actually considering someone in particular but rather in general. After twice, I promised myself that I would never,,,never walk down that pathway again...I made it about 10 years living happily with that decision...a decision I was very committed to keeping. However, recently I learned, once again, the fallacy of saying "Never" to anything especially when it comes to relationships. So yes I have had to reconsider that decision in light of my recent discovery and my answer is a resounding YES I would want to marry again. My belief is that while the commitment is truly of the heart, living together is simply too easy to give up and walk away without being forced to completely consider the long term implications of just walking away. So unless it's just a relationship of convenience and that's understood from the beginning. I think being married actually has some benefits besides giving the children some legitimacy.

[Kissie]

TI while I'm not married presently, I can still remember when I was and when this question came to mind...not when I was actually considering someone in particular but rather in general. After twice, I promised myself that I would never,,,never walk down that pathway again...I made it about 10 years living happily with that decision...a decision I was very committed to keeping. However, recently I learned, once again, the fallacy of saying "Never" to anything especially when it comes to relationships. So yes I have had to reconsider that decision in light of my recent discovery and my answer is a resounding YES I would want to marry again. My belief is that while the commitment is truly of the heart, living together is simply too easy to give up and walk away without being forced to completely consider the long term implications of just walking away. So unless it's just a relationship of convenience and that's understood from the beginning. I think being married actually has some benefits besides giving the children some legitimacy.


But OAK...cant you live together without getting married and have the same type of relationship??? Then if it ever comes that it is time to walk away....you can without all the BS??????

[OnceAKing]

i can't see me ever getting married again. honestly i could see me going off the deep end and partying with a different woman each week for a while!!!! Line em up baby


While I will agree that what you're saying is seemingly desireable for a while, I also know that there is a huge emptiness that goes along with it after a season or two. Both the challenge and the conquest are gratifying...However, sooner or later you'll find that while they all are good and some are way better...even then at some point you'll want to be a part of the motor that's behind the movement...I believe there is one out there that you'll likely run across and not want to turn loose of so quickly.

So enjoy it but remember the saying about never saying never...and I can tell you that eating crow is not so bad but it sometimes takes a while to swallow.

[OnceAKing]

But OAK...cant you live together without getting married and have the same type of relationship??? Then if it ever comes that it is time to walk away....you can without all the BS??????

Certainly it's possible,,anything is...and I suppose it depends on the couple. I just know that for me it's just not the same...I want her to share my name, my family, as well as my life and my possessions. And while living together is certainly a committed relationship, or should be, to me it's just not the same...I would want her to know that I'm proud to give it, the relationship, my all even to the point of knowing there's the possibility of having to deal with the bullshit...I think it's the willingness of giving all of me as opposed to reserving enough to be able avoid the hard part should that be necessary. Just my humble opinion I know.

[Sensual Woman]

Certainly it's possible,,anything is...and I suppose it depends on the couple. I just know that for me it's just not the same...I want her to share my name, my family, as well as my life and my possessions. And while living together is certainly a committed relationship, or should be, to me it's just not the same...I would want her to know that I'm proud to give it, the relationship, my all even to the point of knowing there's the possibility of having to deal with the bullshit...I think it's the willingness of giving all of me as opposed to reserving enough to be able avoid the hard part should that be necessary. Just my humble opinion I know.

I feel the exact same way.

[Kissie]

Certainly it's possible,,anything is...and I suppose it depends on the couple. I just know that for me it's just not the same...I want her to share my name, my family, as well as my life and my possessions. And while living together is certainly a committed relationship, or should be, to me it's just not the same...I would want her to know that I'm proud to give it, the relationship, my all even to the point of knowing there's the possibility of having to deal with the bullshit...I think it's the willingness of giving all of me as opposed to reserving enough to be able avoid the hard part should that be necessary. Just my humble opinion I know.


OK...that was very elegantly said....I just dont know if I could ever put them shoes on again!!!!

[OnceAKing]

OK....I just dont know if I could ever put them shoes on again!!!!

Kissie I actually think that's a healthy way to look at it...when/if the time comes and you're ready to try on a pair, it won't be because you're desperate to not be barefooted.

[OICurready4me]

Never say never... you don't know who will come into your life that will totally take you by storm and turn your life upside down to the point that you want to keep that person in your life forever. I know I had similar thoughts... before I met Mighty. Now, it is a definite. I have never met anyone that has found the places in my heart I never knew I had. I don't just want her in my life until the day I die... I NEED her in my life.

[Atrebla Rose]

I would have to say NO, I will not go down this road again. I have found in the past of course never say never, but as it stands right now, I look forward to the dating, loving and enjoying life for me. Too many let downs and broken promises, to many lonely days while living with another soul. As for the benefits, well I have been the primary supporter/support in my relationships thus far, why would this change now!
Then there is always the thought of the one knocking me on my ass and winning my heart, it has been known to happen. Wonders never cease!

[TammyE]

I definitely would marry again! I've been married twice (first time was only for a year, almost 25 years ago) and wasn't in love either time. I'd like to marry someone I'm head-over-heels in love with. I feel that way about the guy I'm seeing now, but we're both married and he won't leave his wife :(. I truly feel I could love him and be happy with him for the rest of my life.

[NotTooGirly]

when/if the time comes and you're ready to try on a pair, it won't be because you're desperate to not be barefooted.

OAK, you are out-eloquenting yourself this morning. :))): Whereas I am making up words like "out-eloquenting."

I agree, never say never - and it's possible to do this even if you don't have the love of your life in your sights right now. Maybe a little more difficult, but possible. Of course, I'm figuring this all out as I go, but...well, I'll write some stuff down or leave a trail or breadcrumbs or something so I can figure out what it's all about later. ;)

[scoobertina]

Never say never... you don't know who will come into your life that will totally take you by storm and turn your life upside down to the point that you want to keep that person in your life forever. I know I had similar thoughts... before I met Mighty. Now, it is a definite. I have never met anyone that has found the places in my heart I never knew I had. I don't just want her in my life until the day I die... I NEED her in my life.


grrrrrr.... I am so happy for you and I quite agree... someone will step into your life and will just make things all worth while..

I am not sure I will marry again.. but I am not going to push the thought completely aside.. for now i am happy being single and meeting new people.. making friends.. etc.....

[lilolekimba67(f)]

Yes I could well I did

[cherri]

I have given this question lots of thought, but analyzed the pros and cons to no end. Ironic, I have been asked more times to get married while I was already married, than when I was single. I would have to say, first and foremost, it depends on the person you are with. If they have never had kids and are single, and they want kids with you. You have to take it into consideration, if you love him, he deserves to have children of his own. So many factors to consider, but yet, I find myself thinking that with the right person, I would be so happy to be married...again. When I look back, I thought I had it all. I was so happy. I finally had a family of my own, and it started with getting married. I know someday I will get a divorce, when is just the question. I finally came to terms with the thought of giving up my religion so I can move forward. I'm catholic. They make it difficult on you, as if the burden of responsibility wasn't great enough. So to answer your question, yes I would marry again. But it wouldn't have nothing to do with insurance, I would marry again for love and for love alone. If I knew in my heart that I wouldn't love him enough to take care of him if he was in a car accident..and he was a paralyzed from the neck down and couldn't have sex, then I wouldn't marry him. I would have to love him enough to do all that and then some. Only then would it be worth it.

[OnceAKing]

OAK, you are out-eloquenting yourself this morning. :))): Whereas I am making up words like "out-eloquenting."

I agree, never say never - and it's possible to do this even if you don't have the love of your life in your sights right now. Maybe a little more difficult, but possible. Of course, I'm figuring this all out as I go, but...well, I'll write some stuff down or leave a trail or breadcrumbs or something so I can figure out what it's all about later. ;)


lol NTG you're so kind to me...AND I like your word choice by the way...Thanks :kk

[Brink]

You betcha! I very much need to be married to give my love its full meaning. Without marriage, my adoration would still be there, but I don't think it would flourish quite the same. Marriage has been the single most thing guiding my relationships...I'd feel even more lost without it!

Besides which, I went though two divorces in my twenties, survived them, did not regret them really, and took the 'leap of faith' with Wife Number 3 (heh, she hates that)....and have always felt proud of myself for not being deterred.

I think it's one of those questions that depends on your present state of happiness, feelings can change within months of finding that special person. The mind has a habit of blanking out negative thoughts and experiences, even the logical ones, when you're thoroughly absorbed with love!

[wisconsin(m)]

If I had it all to do over again I would of married sooner to have had more time to share with the woman of my dreams......... With marriage comes responsibilities but the love and the closeness far out weighs the burdens. I say this after being married 21 years, it seems the longer we have been together the more we have gotten to know each other and because of the mutual respect we have for one another it keeps getting better. :sng
We have out moments like all married couples but they are few and far in between.

[Kissie]

Kissie I actually think that's a healthy way to look at it...when/if the time comes and you're ready to try on a pair, it won't be because you're desperate to not be barefooted.


I like tobe barefooted!!!!!!

[TIGUY]

King...thanks for sharing those great thoughts! Your wonderful find is an understatement...cherish her to death and always show respect!

:ok

TI while I'm not married presently, I can still remember when I was and when this question came to mind...not when I was actually considering someone in particular but rather in general. After twice, I promised myself that I would never,,,never walk down that pathway again...I made it about 10 years living happily with that decision...a decision I was very committed to keeping. However, recently I learned, once again, the fallacy of saying "Never" to anything especially when it comes to relationships. So yes I have had to reconsider that decision in light of my recent discovery and my answer is a resounding YES I would want to marry again. My belief is that while the commitment is truly of the heart, living together is simply too easy to give up and walk away without being forced to completely consider the long term implications of just walking away. So unless it's just a relationship of convenience and that's understood from the beginning. I think being married actually has some benefits besides giving the children some legitimacy.

[OICurready4me]

I have given this question lots of thought, but analyzed the pros and cons to no end. Ironic, I have been asked more times to get married while I was already married, than when I was single. I would have to say, first and foremost, it depends on the person you are with. If they have never had kids and are single, and they want kids with you. You have to take it into consideration, if you love him, he deserves to have children of his own. So many factors to consider, but yet, I find myself thinking that with the right person, I would be so happy to be married...again. When I look back, I thought I had it all. I was so happy. I finally had a family of my own, and it started with getting married. I know someday I will get a divorce, when is just the question. I finally came to terms with the thought of giving up my religion so I can move forward. I'm catholic. They make it difficult on you, as if the burden of responsibility wasn't great enough. So to answer your question, yes I would marry again. But it wouldn't have nothing to do with insurance, I would marry again for love and for love alone. If I knew in my heart that I wouldn't love him enough to take care of him if he was in a car accident..and he was a paralyzed from the neck down and couldn't have sex, then I wouldn't marry him. I would have to love him enough to do all that and then some. Only then would it be worth it.

I was baptised a Catholic also but I would not call myself one and haven't for quite some time. Being a Catholic is like being in the Mafia...once you get in, you can't get out...

[wisconsin(m)]

Certainly it's possible,,anything is...and I suppose it depends on the couple. I just know that for me it's just not the same...I want her to share my name, my family, as well as my life and my possessions. And while living together is certainly a committed relationship, or should be, to me it's just not the same...I would want her to know that I'm proud to give it, the relationship, my all even to the point of knowing there's the possibility of having to deal with the bullshit...I think it's the willingness of giving all of me as opposed to reserving enough to be able avoid the hard part should that be necessary. Just my humble opinion I know.



You be the man King and you deserve every bit of happiness life can send your way........ And for your lady friend she is a blessed woman to have you in her life. I am sure she is very special as well to have captured the attention of such a great guy....:ok

[Torin]

Nope, I wouldn't. LOTS of insurance companies now allow "partners" to be covered.

It's not that I would be afraid of getting hurt, or putting myself out there again... its more just that I am much more realistic about ME, and what I can handle in a relationship. I have some serious flaws that make me a hard person to be married to.

[PunkyBob]

I am much more realistic about ME, and what I can handle in a relationship. I have some serious flaws that make me a hard person to be married to.

Yeah...most of us do. I wouldn't marry me.:yks

[Torin]

Yeah...most of us do. I wouldn't marry me.:yks

Yeah, but you are kinky enough to cover a lot of those flaws. :kk

[jmsmith12345]

No way. I would just go back to be a man whore.

[Sensual Woman]

Yeah...most of us do. I wouldn't marry me.:yks
:ok
Would you rent yourself out? I can see it now...rent-a-punk....

[PunkyBob]

:ok
Would you rent yourself out? I can see it now...rent-a-punk....


I like that! "Rent-a-Punk." Sure! Even goes with the "American Gigolo" recast idea from the other day/thread.

[Sensual Woman]

I like that! "Rent-a-Punk." Sure! Even goes with the "American Gigolo" recast idea from the other day/thread.

That's where I got the idea from babe....:ok

[OICurready4me]

grrrrrr.... I am so happy for you and I quite agree... someone will step into your life and will just make things all worth while..

I am not sure I will marry again.. but I am not going to push the thought completely aside.. for now i am happy being single and meeting new people.. making friends.. etc.....

Like alot of things in life.... you'll know if or when that time comes along where you say to yourself "this is it!". It may not necessarily happen but as long as you stop and smell the roses along the way, the path you take will be that more enjoyable.

[TammyE]

Never say never... you don't know who will come into your life that will totally take you by storm and turn your life upside down to the point that you want to keep that person in your life forever. I know I had similar thoughts... before I met Mighty. Now, it is a definite. I have never met anyone that has found the places in my heart I never knew I had. I don't just want her in my life until the day I die... I NEED her in my life.

That is so sweet, and it's great that you two found each other!

[Zarret]

Certainly it's possible,,anything is...and I suppose it depends on the couple. I just know that for me it's just not the same...I want her to share my name, my family, as well as my life and my possessions. And while living together is certainly a committed relationship, or should be, to me it's just not the same...I would want her to know that I'm proud to give it, the relationship, my all even to the point of knowing there's the possibility of having to deal with the bullshit...I think it's the willingness of giving all of me as opposed to reserving enough to be able avoid the hard part should that be necessary. Just my humble opinion I know.

I completely agree :hug:

[TIGUY]

don't you ever forget those very realistic qualities my wonderful friend...

affection, devotion, dedication, honesty, respect....to name but a few...and I know this to be true. Oh... and you are passionate in all you do...

:hug:



Nope, I wouldn't. LOTS of insurance companies now allow "partners" to be covered.

It's not that I would be afraid of getting hurt, or putting myself out there again... its more just that I am much more realistic about ME, and what I can handle in a relationship. I have some serious flaws that make me a hard person to be married to.

[texsgal]

I hate to say no because you just don't know what cards will be dealt your way.. Anything is possible.

[PEBBLIEPOO]

No i would not remarry been there 2 times already and not going for a third

[Sweetdreams069]

Don't think so. Too many good looking women out there.

[gatorgal]

Ive tried the marriage thing twice now.... I love married life.... but I dont know if I can "honestly" make someone truly happy...and I dont know if I want to take the chance of being heartbroken again...

[Sylar]

This is it for me. I'm on my second marriage, and it's awesome, but my first was an embarrassingly dismal failure. There won't be a third.

[Krystal]

I'm going to go with the "never say never" theory. However, I will say that if it comes to that, it won't happen right away. I married way too young and as I'm getting to know myself more, I realize I fall way too hard. I need a little "me" time before I fall for that again.

[likesbuttons]

dunno...that's all i can say......

[Torin]

I'm going to go with the "never say never" theory. However, I will say that if it comes to that, it won't happen right away. I married way too young and as I'm getting to know myself more, I realize I fall way too hard. I need a little "me" time before I fall for that again.

I'll catch you... I might grope you a bit... but you'll be safe! :kk

[Krystal]

I'll catch you... I might grope you a bit... but you'll be safe! :kk

And when it becomes legal everywhere....I'd ask you....and deal with your flaws. :kk :na

[Torin]

And when it becomes legal everywhere....I'd ask you....and deal with your flaws. :kk :na

I'd be the first girl ever with a diamond strap on as an engagement ring!!!


You know I'd say yes... I'm not afraid of bigamy!

[Krystal]

Hopefully diamonds have gotten...umm...smoother *ahem* over the years?


I'd be the first girl ever with a diamond strap on as an engagement ring!!!


You know I'd say yes... I'm not afraid of bigamy!

[Torin]

Hopefully diamonds have gotten...umm...smoother *ahem* over the years?


Ohhh... ouch. Yeah, I should have thought that one thru a little more.

*blush*

[likesbuttons]

no pain no gain, girls....

[Charmed]

helll No

[Catman354]

I think its interesting that a lot of women would never marry again, me, I don't know if another person in this world could stand me for very long so I probably couldn't find anyone to stay with me very long.

[sassynsweet]

I've been divorced 19 years.. ouch! I've had two long term relationships during those years, but neither did I consider marrying for similar reasons. I loved being married.. just not to the man I did it with! I am open to the idea, but it just hasn't been "right". I learned a lot through those 3 relationships! For me, it has to be right. I can't settle or over-compromise.

[Mr.B5546]

I was married for 20 years, I had a job that took me away from home for 6 months when I got back it was all over in a matter of 2 weeks , she left took nothing with her not even the kids and said she " this isn't where I want to be". Do you really think that I have faith in organized marriage and as far as love (other than my children) goes I find that concept hard to comprehend these days! It's been 12 years now since she left and I still feel the same way, I have "loved"( cared for,supported, enjoyed their company, felt compassion both physically and mentally ) , many women in those years but to say that I thought it was for ever and always, well that bull is not true . I haven't even spoken those 3 words to another human other than my kids . No I can't comprehend making the same vows and promises again because I am not able to live up to the promises involved! Honest enough for you?