Getting my life back

[robertsm]

Hi All

I'm new here and I can't believe I registered and posting on forums.

You see my life story so far is quite common here. In my first year of college, I was 19yr and I got myself pregnant, well not myself if you know what I mean :) We did the right thing and got married. We both decided that my husband pursue his career and he will look great after his housewife and son. Everything went great and quick, my son is 3 years old and at cresh this year. I finally seem to be getting my life back now, well maybe I should rather put it as more time for myself while husband is at work and son is at school. Friends says I should got onto facebook, but I have seen how this takes up your life. I'm thinking of studing part-time or getting a have day job.

Anyway, enough background, so here's my dilemma, because of our mistake, I missed out on the fun college years. My husband was my first, so I don't know what its like with another person. I love my family too much to have an real affair and they all seem to end badly (like in the movies). Thought this would be a great place to live out some safe and innocently.

Is there anyone else that is in the same dilemma or something similar ?

[Tempest]

I share some similarities with you. While I did get to experiment with several (eh hem) men before I got married, I got pregnant when I was 22 and we got married. I love him, I don't regret marrying him, but I did have to change a lot to fit into his idea of wife and mother. I am 36 now and seem to be having a mini-midlife crisis. I want to experiment, have some freedom and make choices for me, not because it's what's expected of me. This place has done WONDERS for me. I hope you feel the freedom I did, and let yourself flirt to your heart's content. There are some great men on here, and just as in the real world, some you need to be a little cautious with.

Happy flirting!!

[Kissie]

my situation isnt quite like yours but I did marry very young (17)...and we did have 3 kids by the time we were 22...(guess we enjoyed the rabbit habit...lol)
Now I am 46 and I want to go to school to further myself...and he is not to happy with that as we are parenting our 4 year old grandson!!!
He had a mid life crisis a couple years back and re enlisted into the Army after being out for 13 years....so we move around alot and my work record shows it...so it is hard to find a job....
I have thought anout getting out many times...but just cant do it....
I hope that you enjoy your time here....

[blu]

Hi All

I'm new here and I can't believe I registered and posting on forums.

You see my life story so far is quite common here. In my first year of college, I was 19yr and I got myself pregnant, well not myself if you know what I mean :) We did the right thing and got married. We both decided that my husband pursue his career and he will look great after his housewife and son. Everything went great and quick, my son is 3 years old and at cresh this year. I finally seem to be getting my life back now, well maybe I should rather put it as more time for myself while husband is at work and son is at school. Friends says I should got onto facebook, but I have seen how this takes up your life. I'm thinking of studing part-time or getting a have day job.

Anyway, enough background, so here's my dilemma, because of our mistake, I missed out on the fun college years. My husband was my first, so I don't know what its like with another person. I love my family too much to have an real affair and they all seem to end badly (like in the movies). Thought this would be a great place to live out some safe and innocently.

Is there anyone else that is in the same dilemma or something similar ?
many of us are, just diff ages and reasons for being in the same boat. i dont know how to break it to you though, but you will be addicted here too, and hate to leave. much gl to you. im sure youll end up smiling

[glamourgirl]

Hi All

I'm new here and I can't believe I registered and posting on forums.

You see my life story so far is quite common here.I'm thinking of studing part-time or getting a have day job.

Is there anyone else that is in the same dilemma or something similar ?

girl we are like twins..... looking forward to getting to know you!
i did finish my degree! and work 100 hr weeks and come here to escape the intensity of my job and for fun that i lack elsewhere.... beware, its can be addicting!
I have met amazing people here. Fun intelligent caring friends that make my life better
My youngest is a senior this year and I have no regrets about the choices I made along the way.
Now is the time for a new begining for me and this was a great place to start. I have learned alot about myself since I came here. Its a safe place to have fun....
Enjoy!

[Charmed]

I must be the odd duck here because at 22 I was blissfully married...

[MiSt09]

Welcome robertsm... like you, I jumped into marriage and children way too fast. I had my first child at 21 and was pregnant again at 22. I will never regret having my children, but I definitely wish I would have "shopped around" more wisely before settling down with my hubby. Anyways... I hope you find what you're looking for here... see ya around!

[Danso]

Hi All

I'm new here and I can't believe I registered and posting on forums.

You see my life story so far is quite common here. In my first year of college, I was 19yr and I got myself pregnant, well not myself if you know what I mean :) We did the right thing and got married. We both decided that my husband pursue his career and he will look great after his housewife and son. Everything went great and quick, my son is 3 years old and at cresh this year. I finally seem to be getting my life back now, well maybe I should rather put it as more time for myself while husband is at work and son is at school. Friends says I should got onto facebook, but I have seen how this takes up your life. I'm thinking of studing part-time or getting a have day job.

Anyway, enough background, so here's my dilemma, because of our mistake, I missed out on the fun college years. My husband was my first, so I don't know what its like with another person. I love my family too much to have an real affair and they all seem to end badly (like in the movies). Thought this would be a great place to live out some safe and innocently.

Is there anyone else that is in the same dilemma or something similar ?

Welcome to the site, you'll find some like-minded people here. As long as keeping things virtual works for you, you should find lots of friends over time.

Assuming your husband is of a similar age, he "missed out on the fun college years" as well. While it's a big step, you might consider broaching the subject of open marriage with him. It works surprisingly well for many couples I know but it does take a lot of work from both sides.

Tread carefully when you post private information - unless you have no qualms about what you are posting privately becoming public, don't post it.

[WandaRing]

Hi All

I'm new here and I can't believe I registered and posting on forums.

Is there anyone else that is in the same dilemma or something similar ?
Hi robertsm, welcome to the site. I guess I'll play it straight and honest with you...you say you love your family and I assume that you includes your husband in that love? Why would you want to do anything that might ruin your relationship?

The time you missed out by not going to college as a young adult is long gone...you cant go back and get it no matter what you do. I know what it is like to miss parts of your youth...at 20 yrs of age I had to raise my 4 yr old nephew when my sister passed away suddenly. I quit college to look after him and did the best that I could....my friends thought and said openly that I had taken on too much responsibility...but he was my sisters son, I couldn't and wouldn't see him grow up in foster care. I missed out on the parties, the idoit times of being "a young adult", and I had a child to care for...he became my priority in life.

You can go back to college as an adult and mother of a three year old...it may not be the same as when you were 18-22 yrs old, but it is still fun and there are a lot of groups to join, new people to meet and lots to learn....

Just be sure and understand what you're missing or at least think you've missed out on...is it your care free youth, or having sex with more then just one man or the fact that you had to grow up to raise a child or making lots of new friends and learning new things...Some of this CAN be made up, but going back to the care free 19 year old will never happen again...take what you can now...go back to college...you are still young (21 or 22 I gather)...making lots for friends...

Life only happens when you make it happen...sit on the couch and feel bad about the days you've missed means that every minute you do it, you just lost a minute to enjoy your life and what you have and what you can do now...

[leighm]

my situation isnt quite like yours but I did marry very young (17)...and we did have 3 kids by the time we were 22...(guess we enjoyed the rabbit habit...lol)

He had a mid life crisis a couple years back and re enlisted into the Army after being out for 13 years.......

Sorry to get off track for a bit but............why does it always seem OK for the men to have a midlife crisis, go off the rails and expect to be forgiven.........but not OK for the women???

[leighm]

Ok robertsm, I too missed out on the care free years of youth. My mother fell ill when I was 17 and as I was not working at the time I had to take over running the house. My older sister was working, as was our dad, and my younger brother still in high school. I only really had 2 boyfriends and I married the second one at 20 and he was my first too. Had my first child by 22 and went on to have 2 more. I stayed home to care for my children. Which looking back now was a mistake. But it was the best choice at the time. We had a hard slog but we pulled through. If you have the opportunity to go to college DO IT! If you love your husband, don't look outside the marriage for excitement at this young age. Talk to each other about any little thing that bothers you. My husband was not one to communicate well and he now regrets that.
By all means post and chat on here but please be extremely careful. Things can get carried away so quickly. Think carefully about what you want first. I suggest for the moment you just look to making friends. So many lovely people here and all willing to lend a hand when you are having difficulties be it on site or within your marriage.
As I said hubby and I had it hard for many years and often I felt the urge to leave. Glad I didn't, we have been together now for 29yrs and things are better than ever.
Concentrate on raising your kid(s), learning and growing but take hubby along on that ride.

[MCat]

At 22 I didn't have time to wipe my nose...too busy working, pregnant with my first child, and thought I was blissfully married.

I guess if I were you I would sign up for those classes....do it while you're young if you have a choice.

[SAPPHIRE]

Good luck with what you chose to do ... Just be strong in whatever it is that you do and you will get everything you want and deserve ... Everyone is here for their own reasons and I just hope they all get what they are searching for

[jasper669]

I must be the odd duck here because at 22 I was blissfully married...

No, you are not the odd duck. I, too, was happily married by 22.

[Penny]

I was a mom before I turned 20 but now Im through with diapers and still young enough to have fun. Life is what you make it

[tag2420]

We all have similar stories, met my wife young and our first was born when she was 20. Two years later we got married and had another son. Now they are alot older and people just seem to get comfortable with each other. I guess this is the nice way of putting it. Just stick around here and chat with folks and dont jump into something you may regret down the road.