kissme
08-31-2009, 11:16 AM
An invitation to those who need to get it off their chest....
Dear Mr. Spock,
I am writing this letter to let you know that I can't take this shit anymore. You are the most unaffectionate man I have ever known and despite the fact that I love you, it has gotten to the point that it is no longer enough.
When I am hurt and crying, you sit there stone faced with nothing to say, not even an "I'm Sorry" or "What can I do to help". There are no hugs, no kisses, no hand-holding, no touching, no phone calls, no flowers, no romance, no intimacy, no passion, no forgivness, no compliments, no cuddling, and having sex with you has become so routine and predictable that I feel as though I am having sex with a robot. We never make love, we just screw once in awhile. Same position, same routine, same sequence of events.
I don't understand why you insist on never listening to my wants and needs and instead you choose to ignore me. You work nights, I work days. I have never screwed around on you, I am home every night.....alone. I have no one to talk to. I am lonely and I need something more exciting in my life. I have not felt sexy, or desirable for years. I have tried leaving you love notes on the bathroom mirror, you never responded. I have tried making suggestive remarks, and you respond by giving me sarcasm and insults. I fantasize about other men while having sex with you. I fantasize about long passionate kisses whenever I see one on T.V. I don't understand why kissing me is so horrible for you. I don't understand why you are so cold and show no emotions.
You are suppose to be my best friend, my confidant, my lover, my soul mate and my equal. I have been forced it seems into finding other ways to feed my soul. Through my art, and my friends, my family (which you want nothing to do with), and now a forum in which I can flirt and be myself and feel sexy once in awhile.
You always manage to make me feel like the least important person in your life. Something else is always more important, your kids, you grandkids, your job.... How should I feel when your idea of a "family portrait" includes you, your kids, and your grandkids, but does not include me? We have been together for a long long time now and I don't see us growing old together. I see us growing apart. Soon, it will be too late to go back and fix it. Soon I will break out of this shell and spread my wings. I may end up alone, but at least it will be by choice, not because the person in my life chooses to not see me. I am invisible, I am nothing, I am tired, and I am unhappy. What will it take for you to see me? Do I just have to disappear? Will you only see me after I am gone and it's too late? I hope not.
Love,
Me
Dear Mr. Spock,
I am writing this letter to let you know that I can't take this shit anymore. You are the most unaffectionate man I have ever known and despite the fact that I love you, it has gotten to the point that it is no longer enough.
When I am hurt and crying, you sit there stone faced with nothing to say, not even an "I'm Sorry" or "What can I do to help". There are no hugs, no kisses, no hand-holding, no touching, no phone calls, no flowers, no romance, no intimacy, no passion, no forgivness, no compliments, no cuddling, and having sex with you has become so routine and predictable that I feel as though I am having sex with a robot. We never make love, we just screw once in awhile. Same position, same routine, same sequence of events.
I don't understand why you insist on never listening to my wants and needs and instead you choose to ignore me. You work nights, I work days. I have never screwed around on you, I am home every night.....alone. I have no one to talk to. I am lonely and I need something more exciting in my life. I have not felt sexy, or desirable for years. I have tried leaving you love notes on the bathroom mirror, you never responded. I have tried making suggestive remarks, and you respond by giving me sarcasm and insults. I fantasize about other men while having sex with you. I fantasize about long passionate kisses whenever I see one on T.V. I don't understand why kissing me is so horrible for you. I don't understand why you are so cold and show no emotions.
You are suppose to be my best friend, my confidant, my lover, my soul mate and my equal. I have been forced it seems into finding other ways to feed my soul. Through my art, and my friends, my family (which you want nothing to do with), and now a forum in which I can flirt and be myself and feel sexy once in awhile.
You always manage to make me feel like the least important person in your life. Something else is always more important, your kids, you grandkids, your job.... How should I feel when your idea of a "family portrait" includes you, your kids, and your grandkids, but does not include me? We have been together for a long long time now and I don't see us growing old together. I see us growing apart. Soon, it will be too late to go back and fix it. Soon I will break out of this shell and spread my wings. I may end up alone, but at least it will be by choice, not because the person in my life chooses to not see me. I am invisible, I am nothing, I am tired, and I am unhappy. What will it take for you to see me? Do I just have to disappear? Will you only see me after I am gone and it's too late? I hope not.
Love,
Me