View Full Version : Just got separated!! Yahoo, yippie, what a relief!
UltimateNaneki
07-02-2007, 05:04 AM
Hello everyone,
Yes I just recently got separated for hubby. Now I have a delemma, hoping you can help me.
What to do with the wedding ring?
It's only a band, that I chose but do I still wear it? Do hide it? Throw it away? I don't know what to do.....
Do any of you have an idea?
Thanks for sharing, in advance!:wa:
Pebbles
07-02-2007, 10:17 AM
Throw it away in the trash can.
Have it made into a pendant.
Pawn it.
Throw it in a lake or river.
Sell it.
RedVixen
07-02-2007, 10:29 AM
Well I think for starters you need to stop wearing it. Maybe put it in a small jewelry box that is out of sight until you are ready. Ending a marriage is no small feat and you're going to need some time to heal from this chapter of your life. I wouldn't get 'rid' of the ring in a harsh way - not yet anyhow. Give yourself time and don't forget we're all here as a supportive family :)
tiger50
07-02-2007, 10:29 AM
lol.. me too, 12 days to move out...... woohoo.....:D
Parkergrey
07-02-2007, 10:33 AM
Congratulations?
RedVixen has the right idea IMO. Just relax, put the ring away somewhere out of sight. I hope you're doing okay.
flamengo130
07-02-2007, 10:46 AM
Keep the ring. Put it away, but don't wear it anymore. I saved the wedding rings my ex "returned" to me, and gave them to our daughter 30 years later.
My_Secrets_Kept
07-02-2007, 10:50 AM
Ulti I'd stop wearing it immediatly, wouldn't want hubby to get the wrong idea as to why you would still be wearing it! As far as what to do with it, well I'm sure the right idea will come to you in time, so for now just put it in a safe place. Although my first thought was to say to drop it in the garbage disposal or whack it with a mallet while thinking about your hubby, or something along those lines lol j/k ;)
Congratulations!
shorty51000
07-02-2007, 12:01 PM
[I]put it away for know and when the time is right you will know what to do with it good luck
cherokeered
07-02-2007, 07:03 PM
Hello everyone,
Yes I just recently got separated for hubby. Now I have a delemma, hoping you can help me.
What to do with the wedding ring?
It's only a band, that I chose but do I still wear it? Do hide it? Throw it away? I don't know what to do.....
Do any of you have an idea?
Thanks for sharing, in advance!:wa:
hun...hold onto it for a few reasons....if ya need money you can sell it...if you go out and dont want to be bothered wear it ( no guarentee)...just tuck it away in the jewelry box or somewhere you don't look every day....ya never know when ya might need one...lol
Missy38
07-02-2007, 07:12 PM
You can always take your wedding band off, put it away and wear a different ring on that finger, that way it won't feel so funny without it.... I stopped wearing my wedding rings awhile before my hubby and I got seperated then, gave them to my Mom.... We both have moved on and we are both happy with other people, we were married for 14 yrs but, both of us weren't very happy for the last 5 yrs., we stayed together for the kids.....we are planning to get a divorce soon....so then unc and I can get married.....
UltimateNaneki
07-02-2007, 07:26 PM
hun...hold onto it for a few reasons....if ya need money you can sell it...if you go out and dont want to be bothered wear it ( no guarentee)...just tuck it away in the jewelry box or somewhere you don't look every day....ya never know when ya might need one...lol
I like that idea cherokeered, take it along if I go out!! hmmm
bryan3636
07-02-2007, 11:38 PM
All good suggestions....definitely take it off, put it away and when the divorce is final then ask again and we may have dramatically different answers. But if it's gold it's worth something and since you got nothing out of the marriage you might as well get something out of the ring....btw, how'd the move go???
UltimateNaneki
07-02-2007, 11:42 PM
All good suggestions....definitely take it off, put it away and when the divorce is final then ask again and we may have dramatically different answers. But if it's gold it's worth something and since you got nothing out of the marriage you might as well get something out of the ring....btw, how'd the move go???
Hello :wa: Bryan! the move was good, my brother came and helped...I do miss him!
Dsparate Hswife
07-02-2007, 11:58 PM
I hope I can help...I was separated once from my husband, but we never divorced. We actually reconciled several months later. I didn't wear my ring during that time. I don't think you should do anything with it, except to not wear it. Believe me, I am in no way insinuating that you would reconcile or would want to...But emotions are raw right now...you need some time and distance from all of this...put it away and revisit the subject at a later date...
Sneaky
07-03-2007, 12:00 AM
Hello everyone,
Yes I just recently got separated for hubby.:wa:
I just wanted to say Congrats, since you sound so happy. I think you have already gotten some great advice on what do do with your ring. Now.....what to do with the rest of your life? I'm happy for you.:lf
Outta
07-03-2007, 12:10 AM
Hello everyone,
Yes I just recently got separated for hubby. Now I have a delemma, hoping you can help me.
What to do with the wedding ring?
It's only a band, that I chose but do I still wear it? Do hide it? Throw it away? I don't know what to do.....
Do any of you have an idea?
Thanks for sharing, in advance!:wa:
Hmm, if it's a 2c engagement ring, please send it to Suz for me and tell her it's from me. Tks.:D
Sounds like this has been a long time coming, Ulti. Having been through it myself, allow me to give you some feedback. As Vixen said, you need to take some time to grieve the end of this era. Even if it's the best thing for you, it's still the death of something that was once significant for you and in order to truly reconcile it to the past, you need to come to terms with that.
With that in mind, put your ring away for now. Don't do anything with it while your emotions are running so high. Too often we do things in the heat of the moment that we can't undo later. As DH said, it's not because you're going to reconcile, but because you need to distance yourself from the situation first so you can be clear-headed when you make the desicion.
I wihs you luck with this next chapter! Remember we're all here for you!
yaser
07-03-2007, 12:20 AM
Sounds like this has been a long time coming, Ulti. Having been through it myself, allow me to give you some feedback. As Vixen said, you need to take some time to grieve the end of this era. Even if it's the best thing for you, it's still the death of something that was once significant for you and in order to truly reconcile it to the past, you need to come to terms with that.
With that in mind, put your ring away for now. Don't do anything with it while your emotions are running so high. Too often we do things in the heat of the moment that we can't undo later. As DH said, it's not because you're going to reconcile, but because you need to distance yourself from the situation first so you can be clear-headed when you make the desicion.
I wihs you luck with this next chapter! Remember we're all here for you!
I can also sign this,Jazzy...You are a true friend of dark days..
dave42
07-03-2007, 12:25 AM
A wedding ring??? What the hell is that!
dave42
07-03-2007, 12:31 AM
Hmm, if it's a 2c engagement ring, please send it to Suz for me and tell her it's from me. Tks.:D haha!! sucker!!:D :D :D
Dsparate Hswife
07-03-2007, 12:32 AM
A wedding ring??? What the hell is that!
It's a ring someone gives you that means that you are not allowed to look at anyone of the opposite sex, have any improper thoughts about anyone of the opposite sex...Oh!! And you have to live with this person for the rest of your life despite the fact that they no longer want sex...and you also have to invite their family for a function at your house at least once a year...Sound fun?
:na
Keep the ring. Put it away, but don't wear it anymore. I saved the wedding rings my ex "returned" to me, and gave them to our daughter 30 years later.
I agree...I would give my rings to my daughter when she was big enough not to lose them.
Hmm, if it's a 2c engagement ring, please send it to Suz for me and tell her it's from me. Tks.:D
Uhm..that would be a 3 carat
Outta
07-03-2007, 12:38 AM
Uhm..that would be a 3 carat
sorry, lost my head.
yaser
07-03-2007, 12:38 AM
I agree...I would give my rings to my daughter when she was big enough not to lose them.
I would like to wear your ring Suz though I know it is too narrow for me..
dave42
07-03-2007, 12:53 AM
It's a ring someone gives you that means that you are not allowed to look at anyone of the opposite sex, have any improper thoughts about anyone of the opposite sex...Oh!! And you have to live with this person for the rest of your life despite the fact that they no longer want sex...and you also have to invite their family for a function at your house at least once a year...Sound fun?
:naAnd that is exactly why I have never worn one.
dave42
07-03-2007, 12:57 AM
Uhm..that would be a 3 caratOh hell, Lets just make it an even 4 I'll even throw in half my investments.
UltimateNaneki
07-03-2007, 01:02 AM
I hope I can help...I was separated once from my husband, but we never divorced. We actually reconciled several months later. I didn't wear my ring during that time. I don't think you should do anything with it, except to not wear it. Believe me, I am in no way insinuating that you would reconcile or would want to...But emotions are raw right now...you need some time and distance from all of this...put it away and revisit the subject at a later date...
thanks Dsparate Hswife!!:kk
UltimateNaneki
07-03-2007, 01:04 AM
Hmm, if it's a 2c engagement ring, please send it to Suz for me and tell her it's from me. Tks.:D
:nu Outta, my hubby was lucky there, I refused the diamonds. I have but a simple band with pink,white and yellow gold!
Oh hell, Lets just make it an even 4 I'll even throw in half my investments.
Now you're talkin':55
Niceandsmove
08-02-2007, 10:43 PM
Have fun... Have fun.
UltimateNaneki
08-02-2007, 10:51 PM
Have fun... Have fun.
Hello darling...I have been trying to have some fun...but the ex is now finding that he misses me....poor thing:nu
suzie147
08-02-2007, 11:51 PM
Ult,
I have been separated since May... at first I wore the ring - but after awhile I took it off since I felt that it was giving everyone the wrong message. I put it in my Jewelry box... who knows what I will do with it one day. Since I have not told anyone that I work with about my situation, I have found it handy when I need to see people that I do not want to know... so keep it... put it away... and use it if needed... that is what I would advise.
Good Luck to you - I truly understand how you feel... I am totally happy that I pulled the trigger... but sometimes it is bittersweet - it is kind of like the end of an era and the beginning of a new chapter - which is always pretty scary... exciting... but scary!!
Congrats... I really mean that!!!
UltimateNaneki
12-04-2007, 02:25 AM
Been without my hubby now for 5months and I don't feel any worse.
He recently asked me if I was any happier then when we were together. I truthfully explained that I cry like I use to when we were together. I'm just alone now.
See if you guys don't know, ex and I work at the same office. Not together but the same office.
Yet I have felt better these days.
I know that I will heel! And all my friends here have helped me so much!! THANK YOU!
SEXAHOLIC
12-04-2007, 04:15 AM
take the ring off and put it away.
UltimateNaneki
12-04-2007, 04:17 AM
take the ring off and put it away.
The ring is away....
SEXAHOLIC
12-04-2007, 05:48 AM
The ring is away....
Well done....Now start living the life you deserve.:)
Pebbles
12-04-2007, 06:51 AM
The ring is away....
UltimateNaneki...good for you! You deserve the best in life! You are truly a wonderful person! :)
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