Cliches and Sayings

[Huzyerdaddi]

Did you hang around older folks growing up? Do people in your neck of the woods express themselves with clever phrases? Share your favorites here.

[Han Solo]

Referring to someone as "Having Diarrhea of the Mouth and Constipation of the Brain":lmao

[Huzyerdaddi]

Uglier than a bucket full of armpits

[cyclops]

I've seen more life in a tramp's vest

[Annie]

Referring to someone as "the cat's meow" or a "hoser", "hose head", referring to dancing as "trip the light fantastic", those a just a few I can think of now.... I'm sure there will more later.

[cyclops]

Referring to a rather efeminate man - "He's as camp as a row of pink tents"

[Huzyerdaddi]

I've seen more life in a tramp's vest

lol Good one!

[Han Solo]

Referring to a rather efeminate man - "He's as camp as a row of pink tents"
Oh, that is so wrong on at least two different levels..........Pink tents?? Well that applies a couple different ways there.............either way I don't think I want a merit badge from that camp out! LMAO

[Huzyerdaddi]

As confused as a hungry baby in a topless bar

[Huzyerdaddi]

About as welcome as a fart in a telephone box

[Huzyerdaddi]

He's about as subtle as a flying brick

[Han Solo]

About as welcome as a fart in a telephone box
I was gonna go with fart in a space suit, but that works too!:55

[Huzyerdaddi]

She's got more wrinkles than an Elephants scrotum

[Huzyerdaddi]

As confused as a blind lesbian in a fish market

[Huzyerdaddi]

You're As useful as a one armed trapeze artist with an itchy ass

[Huzyerdaddi]

Confucious Say: man who go to sleep with itchy ass wake up with stinky finger

[Huzyerdaddi]

As pissed as a fart in a vacuum cleaner

[Huzyerdaddi]

I'm as worn out as a cucumber in a convent

[Cotties]

wanker seems common.....I was called a wanker a million times even before I had ever wanked

[bryan3636]

It's hotter than a monkey's uterus!!!

[Annie]

wanker seems common.....I was called a wanker a million times even before I had ever wankedOh gimme a break! You probably came out of your mother's womb wankin!

[Huzyerdaddi]

Oh gimme a break! You came out of your mother's womb wankin!


wow! You gonna take that?

[p.J]

All Cliches should be avoided like the plaque, however, I hadn't realised that I actually use them quite a lot! With finesse and in the right context they can be bloody useful!!


A favourite saying of mine... though unfortunately one I cannot take credit for, is:

“today’s striking thought is tomorrow’s platitude, and next week’s cliche”.

My favourite cliche?

"All talk and no action" :rolleyes:

[RedVixen]

My grandmother is always saying and still gets a chuckle out of me:

'all you whippersnappers'

[bryan3636]

Even a blind squirrel can find an acorn every now and then

[hoss]

something i dont hear alot nowadays ........

money doesnt grow on trees u know ............

[My_Secrets_Kept]

something i dont hear alot nowadays ........

money doesnt grow on trees u know ............


I say this all the time to both my husband and my son!

[hoss]

I say this all the time to both my husband and my son!

good for u ....seeing all these young kids in bmws and fast cars ,i dont think they hear that often

[My_Secrets_Kept]

good for u ....seeing all these young kids in bmws and fast cars ,i dont think they hear that often


yup, what happened to a kids first car being an used car? Heck I didn't have a new car until I was capable enough of purchasing and paying for it all on my own & still have only ever had two brand spanking new cars!

[GeekMaster]

"Useless as tits on a boar hog."

"Hotter than a $2 pistol."

"As crooked as a dog's hind leg."

[cyclops]

It's as big as a baby's arm holding an orange ;)

[My_Secrets_Kept]

"Everything happens for a reason"

even though this does hold true for the most part, still not too keen on this saying

[My_Secrets_Kept]

"Useless as tits on a boar hog."

"Hotter than a $2 pistol."

"As crooked as a dog's hind leg."


ok, this is not the one I've always heard

how bout: "As crooked as a dogs dick"

[cyclops]

Or an English saying:


"As bent as a 9 bob note"

[Annie]

in a New York minute

slow as sap in January

[cyclops]

as much use as a chocolate fireguard

[MCat]

Colder than a well-diggers ass...

Hotter than a whore in heat...

Colder than a witches tit...

Hotter than a two peckered goat...

[toowildtotame]

easy as pie

there's no place like home
Many hands make light work
any friend of yours is a friend of mine
ONCE A Cheater always a Cheater

[hank69]

Hotter than 3 nuns at a dirty movie..

Slicker than cat shit on a linoleum floor

[p.J]

Hotter than 3 nuns at a dirty movie..

Slicker than cat shit on a linoleum floor


:D

[ldon]

A bucket of balls, a 12 inch dick, enough hair to weave a rug and you call me a boy?

Heard that one time somewhere.

[My_Secrets_Kept]

"Half past a monkeys ass and a quarter till his balls"

this is the response that my grandmother would give when someone would ask her for the time :D

[Sneaky]

So fast your head will spin....

[OICurready4me]

Cold as a witches tit

[Sneaky]

Uglier than sin

[OICurready4me]

Cold as a well diggers ass in the Yukon

[Han Solo]

She's so ugly she'd make a freight train take a dirt road!

[Sneaky]

Woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.

[unctarheel_32]

She is so ugly she would have to tie a porkchop around her neck to get the dog to play with her.

[bryan3636]

...yeah, and if that rabbit hadn't stopped to take a shit he would have won the race...

[fly]

Slicker than cat shit on a linoleum floor

:lmao Thanks for THAT mental image!!!!
(remind me to wear my shoes in the house from now on!)

[MCat]

Finer than Frogs hair

Shit fire and Piss Kindlin

[My_Secrets_Kept]

"I'll be a monkeys uncle"

[OICurready4me]

tight as a frog's ass....and that's waterproof

[fly]

Dumber than a doorknob.....
or how bout
a brick short of a load.

[My_Secrets_Kept]

"Dumber than a box of rocks"

[OICurready4me]

treat others the way you would like to be treated yourself

[Huzyerdaddi]

Odder than a football bat

[Huzyerdaddi]

Odder than a three dollar bill

[bryan3636]

If he had a brain his whole family would fight over it!

[MIGHTY]

If he had a brain his whole family would fight over it!

Lol...that's a good one......

[OICurready4me]

dumb as a box of rocks

[cyclops]

mad as a box of frogs

[angelis]

mad as a box of frogs

haha!! i love that saying cyclops!! use it a lot!!

(not in reference to myself i hasten to add!!!)

[MCat]

A few cards short of a full deck....

[duanehofner]

Slower than Als gravy

Dumber than a bag of hammers

Well I'll be dipped in shit

When in doubt, punt

Get the hell outta Dodge

[bryan3636]

Not the sharpest tool in the shed

[mrclark76]

fast as shit through a tin horn

[mrclark76]

...rode hard and hung up wet

...well smack my ass and call me Judy

[cyclops]

A sandwich short of a picnic

[cyclops]

My mum used to say this when she heard some suprising news:

"Well I'll go to the foot of our stairs!!"

Answers on a postcard please :whee:

[PlayfulMale69]

"It's as cold as a brass john in the Yukon"

[cyclops]

As rare as rocking horse shit

[cyclops]

Shes got a face like a Bulldog licking piss off a thistle :D

[PlayfulMale69]

She has a face that would make a train take a dirt road!

[flamengo130]

"More smoke and mirrors than a tire fire in a cat house"
"Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey" (which is actually a seafaring saying)
"Even a broken clock is right twice a day"

[razorsedge]

Oh the tangled webs we weave.

[toowildtotame]

Best part of him/her ran down his mommy's butt. or his daddy's leg-- (heard it said both ways.)

[toowildtotame]

She could eat corn through a picket fence
SO ugly she has to sneak up on a river to get a drink

[p.J]

Kiss my ass!

Just fancied saying it... :)

[Vicious305]

Kiss my ass!

Just fancied saying it... :)

well bend over then!

I fancied saying that! and fancy doing it too:D

[bryan3636]

I feel like a pair of brown shoes in a tuxedo world

[duanehofner]

Chuck You, Farley

[duanehofner]

This came up in the lounge yesterday:

Fair to Middlin (or Middling)

[cyclops]

If I stand in front of the TV my wife says "You make a better door than a window"

[My_Secrets_Kept]

If I stand in front of the TV my wife says "You make a better door than a window"

or "Your daddy wasn't a glass blower"

[unctarheel_32]

You are so old that you can give serial numbers off the dirt

[MIGHTY]

You weren't raised in a barn ya know.......

[hank69]

few fries short of a happy meal

[dartgirl]

that was as useful as pissing into the wind.

[MIGHTY]

Well, butter my ass and call me a biscuit!

[Sneaky]

Let me tell you what really frosts my cookies!

[MIGHTY]

Don't piss on my shoes and tell me it's raining.....:nu

[OICurready4me]

Well, butter my ass and call me a biscuit!

You have no idea how good that sounds....I will butter it, bake it and take a big bite out of it

[cyclops]

Sticks like shit to a blanket

[cyclops]

Hornier than a three balled tomcat

[majorfun]

That is like rearranging seats on the Titanic

[majorfun]

That is like trying to separate the salt from the fly shit

[Sneaky]

I had to pick through a couple of weeds to get to the flower.

[OICurready4me]

light her on fire and fuck her for the hell of it

[FRMale]

Oh gimme a break! You probably came out of your mother's womb wankin!

Annie... :lmao I can't remember if I did.... but being rubbed does feel good:lmao

[FRMale]

Kiss my ass!

Just fancied saying it... :)

Is that an invitation;) :lf

[FRMale]

or "Your daddy wasn't a glass blower"

How did you guess... hehehe:D :lmao

[FRMale]

You weren't raised in a barn ya know.......

I wasn't I was raised on a beach....

[Annie]

Is that an invitation;) :lf:sc I think it's instructional...

[Annie]

She's so fat, you'd have to roll her in flour to find the wet spot.How rude!!

[cyclops]

How rude!!

I know but my Grandad used to say it all the time though :whee:

[My_Secrets_Kept]

"You need your head examined"

or when saying to ones self

"I need my head examined" lol

[OICurready4me]

Dumb as a box of rocks

[razorsedge]

that was funnier than watching a monkey trying to fuck a football

[OICurready4me]

cold as a witches tit

[OICurready4me]

call in the dogs and shoot the gun in the air, 'cause this raccoon hunt is over!

[dartgirl]

Don't worry be happy!

Happy as a pig in shit!

[AL(m)]

"Life is a cabaret old friend"

[FRMale]

:sc I think it's instructional...

that would everyday life... being instructional...:lf ;)

[OICurready4me]

when life gives you lemons, make lemonade

[Sneaky]

I was told today that I have more balls than sense. Is that a cliche? LOL.

[cherokeered]

You're only as old as you feel.......................God, I hope that isn't true........lol

[Han Solo]

I was told today that I have more balls than sense. Is that a cliche? LOL.
Ewwwwwwwwwwww! YICK!...................I thought I saw an Adam's Apple in that avatar!! :lmao

[Sneaky]

Ewwwwwwwwwwww! YICK!...................I thought I saw an Adam's Apple in that avatar!! :lmao

It's a figure of speech. :mad:

[FRMale]

You're only as old as you feel.......................God, I hope that isn't true........lol

That isn't you... not by any means;)

[FRMale]

Don't worry be happy!

Happy as a pig in shit!

I'm happy life being a bowl of cherries... The pits

[Annie]

Cram it, clown

[FRMale]

Cram it, clown

Clown yes... but cram it where? where would you like... I'm here to please:lf ;)

[redcat]

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

[redcat]

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer...

Older than dirt.

[PunkyBob]

Don't Run With The Scissors!!!

[PunkyBob]

Not the brightest bulb on the tree

I didn't spend ____ hours (later, days) in labor just for this!

[redcat]

Like the monkey said when he caught his tail in the lawnmower......it won't be long now.

(Gives the kids something to think about when they keep asking..."are we there yet?")

[redcat]

Don't buy a pig in a poke.

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

[p.a]

Cheaters never prosper. Liars can never be trusted

[ldon]

Close enough for government work.

It don't mean nothing,

Colder than a witche's tit in a brass bra.

[MIGHTY]

Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?:sc

[OICurready4me]

Damned if I know....

[redcat]

You're a day late and a dollar short.

He/she/it doesn't stand a snowball's chance in hell!

There are 2 things I like hot.....and one of 'em is chili.

I brought you into this world and I can take you out (Bill Cosby)

[OICurready4me]

Life goes on...

[redcat]

Ain't no bigger than a bar of soap, and it half used.

[OICurready4me]

If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

[Annie]

I was born when the Dead Sea was only sick.

[FRMale]

Dirtier than dirt, and just as old

[spare_change]

Sheeeeeeit!

[spare_change]

She's so ugly she has to wear a pork chop just to get the dog to play with her.

[spare_change]

She's got more chins than a Hong Kong phonebook.

[spare_change]

They call her Taco Bell, cuz when guys see her, they run for the border!

[spare_change]

She'd make a freight train turn down a dirt road.

[spare_change]

He's so ugly his mama takes him everywhere just so she doesn't have to kiss him goodbye.

[spare_change]

He's ugly as grandpa's toenails.


(Now THERE is an image for ya)

[spare_change]

She's so ugly her shadow ran away.

[cherokeered]

Slow as molasses in the winter time

[tiger50]

Slow as molasses in the winter time

is that a slow roll......??????

[hoss]

she acts like her shit dont stink ...........

[lilolekimba67(f)]

Its whats on the inside thats counts not the outside

[Wil]

Better the devil you know...:satan:

[cyclops]

That baby is so ugly his mother feeds him with a catapult

[p.J]

A bad case of colon nose...

[cyclops]

About as useful as tits on a bull.

[p.J]

All hammer, no nail.

[cyclops]

Madder than a baptist in a brothel.

[Sneaky]

It's like comparing apples to oranges

[Papa Chubby]

"I'm going to drive the skin bus to tuna town."

[MIGHTY]

H E double hockey sticks!

[OICurready4me]

homely as a bag of assholes

[a_hungm_houston]

dumb as a bag of hammers

[a_hungm_houston]

you intentionally put those close on?

[a_hungm_houston]

its not you its me

[a_hungm_houston]

thats going to leave a mark

[a_hungm_houston]

this wont hurt me a bit

[guitarman26]

he couldnt get laid in a monkey whore house carrying 2 dozen bannannas

[FRMale]

error easily slides down an incline plain, while truth has to laboriously make its way up

[ldon]

How can you tell if a redneck is married? There's dried tobacco juice on both sides of his pick-up.

[cyclops]

They couldn't hit a cows arse with a banjo (The England Football Team)

[My_Secrets_Kept]

H E double hockey sticks!

haha, haven't heard that in ages!

[OICurready4me]

If you put his brain in a gnats ass, the gnat would fly backwards

[JordanG]

1 tree short of a forest if you know what i mean

[SEXAHOLIC]

About as much use as tits on a greyhound.

[Sneaky]

Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

[Sneaky]

You can take that to the bank!

[Bama River Man]

This ain't my first rodeo.

[Han Solo]

All Hat and No Horse

[Sneaky]

A guy at work always says he has to "Go see a guy about a horse" when he goes to the bathroom.

[Han Solo]

A guy at work always says he has to "Go see a guy about a horse" when he goes to the bathroom.
Does he also say he "needs to go check the weather" when he needs to excuse himself to go break wind?.................On second thought don't answer that.....we might be a little grossed out if we found out you knew that. LOL

[Sneaky]

Does he also say he "needs to go check the weather" when he needs to excuse himself to go break wind?.................On second thought don't answer that.....we might be a little grossed out if we found out you knew that. LOL

He doesn't say anything thank goodness. This is, however, the same wonderful man that puts his hands in his pockets and "adjusts" himself and talks as if everything is normal.

[Han Solo]

He doesn't say anything thank goodness. This is, however, the same wonderful man that puts his hands in his pockets and "adjusts" himself and talks as if everything is normal.
LMAO....I'll stay away from the "and what's wrong with that comment" and change it to..."well we men would appreciate it if the ladies would do some self adjusting during a conversation or two"...........might make it more stimulating.......Just brainstorming is all ;) ......

[Sneaky]

LMAO....I'll stay away from the "and what's wrong with that comment" and change it to..."well we men would appreciate it if the ladies would do some self adjusting during a conversation or two"...........might make it more stimulating.......Just brainstorming is all ;) ......

So to stimulate the conversation we women start adjusting our boobs and stratching ourselves as you talk to us? It's hard enough to get you to listen! If we did that you would hear even LESS of what we say.:whee: Since this is the cliche' thread...it's sometimes like "talking to a brick wall". LOL.

[Han Solo]

So to stimulate the conversation we women start adjusting our boobs and stratching ourselves as you talk to us? It's hard enough to get you to listen! If we did that you would hear even LESS of what we say.:whee: Since this is the cliche' thread...it's sometimes like "talking to a brick wall". LOL.
Just an observation..........but I don't think YOU have a hard time getting someone to listen to you........I realize you are quite the soft spoken delicate flower and all :rolleyes: ;)

[Sneaky]

Just an observation..........but I don't think YOU have a hard time getting someone to listen to you........I realize you are quite the soft spoken delicate flower and all :rolleyes: ;)

:gs Why yes I am. Full of sugar and spice. But I have that "scary chick" side deep inside for when I need to be heard.:nu I know it's shocking. Don't tell anyone. Shshsh.;)

[Han Solo]

:gs Why yes I am. Full of sugar and spice. But I have that "scary chick" side deep inside for when I need to be heard.:nu I know it's shocking. Don't tell anyone. Shshsh.;)
You got it...that secret is safe with me............oh, and the other 18,891 users of this site! ;)

[p.J]

"as focused as a fart"

[cyclops]

"as focused as a fart"

Is that a reference to my eyewear? :nu

[p.J]

Is that a reference to my eyewear? :nu

well now you mention it... no!! daft bugger!

ah well...

Don't blame him, he's from Uranus!

[cyclops]

Drier than a nuns nasty.

[p.J]

wooo hooo!


"Loves a good insult, but can never remember any."

[cyclops]

Hornier than a three balled tomcat.

[p.J]

Moves his lips to pretend he's reading.

[p.J]

nutty as a fruitcake >>>> http://re3.mm-a1.yimg.com/image/1999687086 (http://uk.wrs.yahoo.com/_ylt=AnPPMRBqzD5Isy.HboNYC.FNBQx.;_ylu=X3oDMTBpc2V vdmQ2BHBvcwM3BHNlYwNzcgR2dGlkAw--/SIG=1ia13fasl/**http%3A//uk.images.search.yahoo.com/search/images/view%3Fback=http%253A%252F%252Fuk.images.search.ya hoo.com%252Fsearch%252Fimages%253Fei%253DUTF-8%2526p%253Dcyclops%2526SpellState%253Dn-1131336674_q-Z9tRErPDPZ20lyxTQE.NnQAAAA%252540%252540%2526fr2%2 53Dtab-web%2526fr%253D%26w=259%26h=400%26imgurl=www.hallo ween-mask.com%252Fmorris%252Fhalloween_mask_10042004%25 2Fcyclops_pm7588_mor.jpg%26rurl=http%253A%252F%252 Fwww.halloween-mask.com%252Fcyclops_pm7588_mor.htm%26size=20.4kB% 26name=cyclops_pm7588_mor.jpg%26p=cyclops%26type=j peg%26no=7%26tt=128,768%26oid=265d960ad03947a6%26e i=UTF-8)

[cyclops]

Fit as a buck rat! (and twice as sexy)

[cyclops]

nutty as a fruitcake >>>> http://re3.mm-a1.yimg.com/image/1999687086

:lmao:lmao :nu :lmao:lmao

[simplygrace]

colder than a witched tit. and when your done eating ret up the table,and corn on the cob is roastenears. Grandma's saying.:lmao

[Sylar]

Luckier than a dog with two dicks. :D

[piman]

...yeah, and if that rabbit hadn't stopped to take a shit he would have won the race...

If the dog hadn't stopped to take a piss, it would have caught the rabbit.

[piman]

Reality is an illusion created by lack of alcohol!

[KMike66]

I'm as fine as a frog hair split 4 ways.

[gkeet]

good one piman

[gkeet]

if frogs had wings, they would not bump their asses