Women Aroused by Men Doing Housework

[Annie]

Women Aroused by Men Doing Housework
By Dr. Laura Berman

Say goodbye to French maid costumes. If you want to increase the amount of sex in your relationship, hand the duster to your man!

A recent survey featured in Parentingmagazine has found that 15% of women are aroused when their partners pitch in around the house. Additionally, a 2006 study found that men who helped with household chores were more attractive to their spouses.

Why is this? Well, aside from the fact that some of us simply enjoy the sight of a man in an apron, it could be that women love their own version of Mr. Clean because it gives us a chance to take a much-needed break. Even though the majority of women now work outside the home, most of us still perform the bulk of household chores.

Indeed, a U.K. survey found that women who are coupled performed 15 hours of housework a week, while similarly coupled men only perform 5 hours of housework a week. (The survey also found that being part of a couple increases a woman's workload by 5 hours a week, while coupled men experience a decrease in the amount of chores they perform.) Thus, once a man leaves behind the bachelor's life, the woman begins to pick up the slack (and the socks!).

While it is unfair to ask a woman to do more hours of housework a week simply because she is a woman, most people find that this gender role is hard to escape... and women themselves are not blameless in how these roles play out in their relationships. After all, so-called "man" chores, like cutting the grass, changing the oil, or taking out the trash are still often relegated to the male of the species. Not to mention, some women suffer from the "do-it-all" syndrome, which further prevents them from handing over the mop.

Indeed, being in charge of the household chores means that we get to be in control-we get to decide how the towels are folded, where the mop resides, and when to dust. Sharing the chores with our spouse means relinquishing some of this control, which can be difficult for those of us who like things to be done "just so." Unfortunately, by refusing to share household responsibilities and adding more things on to our plate, we are increasing our own stress level and putting strain on our relationships. Women need to be willing to hand over the mop once in a while, even if it means that the floor isn't as perfect and shiny as when we mop it!

But what happens if your partner isn't willing or eager to share the mopping duties? Positive reinforcement does much more good than nagging. If you want your partner to wipe up his dinner crumbs, ask him once and then leave it alone. When and if he cleans up after himself, reward him with his favorite treat... in the bedroom. Within a couple months, house cleaning will be akin to the ringing of Pavlov's bell, and the sound of a vacuum might just get him drooling!

Remember, a partner who loves and respects you will agree to pitch in more around the house (after all, it's his mess, too), and when you tell him the reward will be a less-stressed environment and more sex for him... you might just have to drag him away from the dirty dishes!

http://health.yahoo.com/experts/sexualhealing/28360/women-aroused-by-men-doing-housework

[MCat]

My hubby regularly does dishes, laundry, and jumps in to help with housework.

It is a turn on....and so nice to come home and find my mess cleaned up...

He's a gem...with a sloppy wife...lol

[Sensual Woman]

Women Aroused by Men Doing Housework
By Dr. Laura Berman

Say goodbye to French maid costumes. If you want to increase the amount of sex in your relationship, hand the duster to your man!

A recent survey featured in Parentingmagazine has found that 15% of women are aroused when their partners pitch in around the house. Additionally, a 2006 study found that men who helped with household chores were more attractive to their spouses.

Why is this? Well, aside from the fact that some of us simply enjoy the sight of a man in an apron, it could be that women love their own version of Mr. Clean because it gives us a chance to take a much-needed break. Even though the majority of women now work outside the home, most of us still perform the bulk of household chores.

Indeed, a U.K. survey found that women who are coupled performed 15 hours of housework a week, while similarly coupled men only perform 5 hours of housework a week. (The survey also found that being part of a couple increases a woman's workload by 5 hours a week, while coupled men experience a decrease in the amount of chores they perform.) Thus, once a man leaves behind the bachelor's life, the woman begins to pick up the slack (and the socks!).

While it is unfair to ask a woman to do more hours of housework a week simply because she is a woman, most people find that this gender role is hard to escape... and women themselves are not blameless in how these roles play out in their relationships. After all, so-called "man" chores, like cutting the grass, changing the oil, or taking out the trash are still often relegated to the male of the species. Not to mention, some women suffer from the "do-it-all" syndrome, which further prevents them from handing over the mop.

Indeed, being in charge of the household chores means that we get to be in control-we get to decide how the towels are folded, where the mop resides, and when to dust. Sharing the chores with our spouse means relinquishing some of this control, which can be difficult for those of us who like things to be done "just so." Unfortunately, by refusing to share household responsibilities and adding more things on to our plate, we are increasing our own stress level and putting strain on our relationships. Women need to be willing to hand over the mop once in a while, even if it means that the floor isn't as perfect and shiny as when we mop it!

But what happens if your partner isn't willing or eager to share the mopping duties? Positive reinforcement does much more good than nagging. If you want your partner to wipe up his dinner crumbs, ask him once and then leave it alone. When and if he cleans up after himself, reward him with his favorite treat... in the bedroom. Within a couple months, house cleaning will be akin to the ringing of Pavlov's bell, and the sound of a vacuum might just get him drooling!

Remember, a partner who loves and respects you will agree to pitch in more around the house (after all, it's his mess, too), and when you tell him the reward will be a less-stressed environment and more sex for him... you might just have to drag him away from the dirty dishes!

http://health.yahoo.com/experts/sexualhealing/28360/women-aroused-by-men-doing-housework


A partner who loves and respects you enough to help out around the house, will respect your needs in bed too...why my husband doesn't do any housework

[sweet]

I do the majority of the household chores, and my husband does one...taking out the garbage. I've asked him to help me out around the house more, but I always get the "I work all day so I am too tired to do anything" speech. I also work outside of the home, even though it's only part time. On the days that I'm pulling 12 hour shifts, I'm still expected to clean, cook, take care of the kids, do laundry, etc... If he actually helped me out more, especially on the days that I have to work, I wouldn't feel so much resentment towards him. So, ladies, if you do have a man who will help you out around the house, you are one lucky woman! :)

[qazed]

While my wife is thankful when I do housework.. it does not turn her on.

[bri_guy_mich]

Anyone in need of a male maid service???

[cheerymissy_34]

aroused hell...i would be passed out on the floor if he ever help me out with the housework..lol

[Torin]

There are few things sexier than a helpful man. ;)

[Sylar]

There are few things sexier than a helpful man. ;)

I'll be right back...I'm gonna go get the laundry. ;)

[spare_change]

You can't be serious.


I've seen con jobs, but this is one of the best.

[Torin]

You can't be serious.


I've seen con jobs, but this is one of the best.

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Dude, it works! :nu

[spare_change]

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Dude, it works! :nu


.... on some.

[Me]

You can't be serious.


I've seen con jobs, but this is one of the best.


Ummmmmmmmmm con??? geesh man...try it! :D

[FLfire4u(m)]

While my wife is thankful when I do housework.. it does not turn her on.
I agree with qazed, so if there are any women that would like me to get down on all fours and mop that floor for ya, just give me a ring>

[spare_change]

Ummmmmmmmmm con??? geesh man...try it! :D


Sorry, hun --- The article offends me ... read it again. It's been a long time since I have seen an article so demeaning and disrespectful to men.

[Me]

Sorry, hun --- The article offends me ... read it again. It's been a long time since I have seen an article so demeaning and disrespectful to men.

read it and re-read it....sorry, don't find it demeaning at all :(

[GeekMaster]

You can't be serious.
I've seen con jobs, but this is one of the best.
.... on some.
Sorry, hun --- The article offends me ... read it again. It's been a long time since I have seen an article so demeaning and disrespectful to men.



:55 :55 :55

[Atrebla Rose]

I agree with qazed, so if there are any women that would like me to get down on all fours and mop that floor for ya, just give me a ring>

Ring Ring....:kk:wa:

[spare_change]

A recent survey featured in Parentingmagazine has found that 15% of women are aroused when their partners pitch in around the house. Additionally, a 2006 study found that men who helped with household chores were more attractive to their spouses.

Why is this? Well, aside from the fact that some of us simply enjoy the sight of a man in an apron, it could be that women love their own version of Mr. Clean because it gives us a chance to take a much-needed break. Even though the majority of women now work outside the home, most of us still perform the bulk of household chores.

So, let's con the poor slob into thinking he's going to get laid more if he does the dishes.


Indeed, a U.K. survey found that women who are coupled performed 15 hours of housework a week, while similarly coupled men only perform 5 hours of housework a week. (The survey also found that being part of a couple increases a woman's workload by 5 hours a week, while coupled men experience a decrease in the amount of chores they perform.) Thus, once a man leaves behind the bachelor's life, the woman begins to pick up the slack (and the socks!).

Men are arrogant lazy slobs who need somebody to take care of them.

While it is unfair to ask a woman to do more hours of housework a week simply because she is a woman, most people find that this gender role is hard to escape... and women themselves are not blameless in how these roles play out in their relationships. After all, so-called "man" chores, like cutting the grass, changing the oil, or taking out the trash are still often relegated to the male of the species. Not to mention, some women suffer from the "do-it-all" syndrome, which further prevents them from handing over the mop.

Let's make a blanket opinion statement, as if it were fact, that clearly puts all the blame on the man. Further, let's criticize, minimize, and sneer at the simplicity of so-called "man" chores. And, after all, women are clearly in charge.

Indeed, being in charge of the household chores means that we get to be in control-we get to decide how the towels are folded, where the mop resides, and when to dust. Sharing the chores with our spouse means relinquishing some of this control, which can be difficult for those of us who like things to be done "just so." Unfortunately, by refusing to share household responsibilities and adding more things on to our plate, we are increasing our own stress level and putting strain on our relationships. Women need to be willing to hand over the mop once in a while, even if it means that the floor isn't as perfect and shiny as when we mop it!

Women are in charge ... we just need to exercise it more smartly to take advantage for poor, stupid men.

But what happens if your partner isn't willing or eager to share the mopping duties? Positive reinforcement does much more good than nagging. If you want your partner to wipe up his dinner crumbs, ask him once and then leave it alone. When and if he cleans up after himself, reward him with his favorite treat... in the bedroom. Within a couple months, house cleaning will be akin to the ringing of Pavlov's bell, and the sound of a vacuum might just get him drooling!

If he doesn't do what we want when we want it, we just have to train him like he is some puppy who pees on the rug. You don't have to be smart to control men, you just have to think like they do .... simplistically.

Remember, a partner who loves and respects you will agree to pitch in more around the house (after all, it's his mess, too), and when you tell him the reward will be a less-stressed environment and more sex for him... you might just have to drag him away from the dirty dishes!

That's right! A man who kowtows to your not-so-subtle extortion will do anything you want. Just promise him a little pussy, and he'll follow you around like the lap dog you have trained him to me.

Guess it depends on whether you're the trainer, or the trainee ....

[fourisit]

A recent survey featured in Parentingmagazine has found that 15% of women are aroused when their partners pitch in around the house. Additionally, a 2006 study found that men who helped with household chores were more attractive to their spouses.

Why is this? Well, aside from the fact that some of us simply enjoy the sight of a man in an apron, it could be that women love their own version of Mr. Clean because it gives us a chance to take a much-needed break. Even though the majority of women now work outside the home, most of us still perform the bulk of household chores.

So, let's con the poor slob into thinking he's going to get laid more if he does the dishes.


Indeed, a U.K. survey found that women who are coupled performed 15 hours of housework a week, while similarly coupled men only perform 5 hours of housework a week. (The survey also found that being part of a couple increases a woman's workload by 5 hours a week, while coupled men experience a decrease in the amount of chores they perform.) Thus, once a man leaves behind the bachelor's life, the woman begins to pick up the slack (and the socks!).

Men are arrogant lazy slobs who need somebody to take care of them.

While it is unfair to ask a woman to do more hours of housework a week simply because she is a woman, most people find that this gender role is hard to escape... and women themselves are not blameless in how these roles play out in their relationships. After all, so-called "man" chores, like cutting the grass, changing the oil, or taking out the trash are still often relegated to the male of the species. Not to mention, some women suffer from the "do-it-all" syndrome, which further prevents them from handing over the mop.

Let's make a blanket opinion statement, as if it were fact, that clearly puts all the blame on the man. Further, let's criticize, minimize, and sneer at the simplicity of so-called "man" chores. And, after all, women are clearly in charge.

Indeed, being in charge of the household chores means that we get to be in control-we get to decide how the towels are folded, where the mop resides, and when to dust. Sharing the chores with our spouse means relinquishing some of this control, which can be difficult for those of us who like things to be done "just so." Unfortunately, by refusing to share household responsibilities and adding more things on to our plate, we are increasing our own stress level and putting strain on our relationships. Women need to be willing to hand over the mop once in a while, even if it means that the floor isn't as perfect and shiny as when we mop it!

Women are in charge ... we just need to exercise it more smartly to take advantage for poor, stupid men.

But what happens if your partner isn't willing or eager to share the mopping duties? Positive reinforcement does much more good than nagging. If you want your partner to wipe up his dinner crumbs, ask him once and then leave it alone. When and if he cleans up after himself, reward him with his favorite treat... in the bedroom. Within a couple months, house cleaning will be akin to the ringing of Pavlov's bell, and the sound of a vacuum might just get him drooling!

If he doesn't do what we want when we want it, we just have to train him like he is some puppy who pees on the rug. You don't have to be smart to control men, you just have to think like they do .... simplistically.

Remember, a partner who loves and respects you will agree to pitch in more around the house (after all, it's his mess, too), and when you tell him the reward will be a less-stressed environment and more sex for him... you might just have to drag him away from the dirty dishes!

That's right! A man who kowtows to your not-so-subtle extortion will do anything you want. Just promise him a little pussy, and he'll follow you around like the lap dog you have trained him to me.

Guess it depends on whether you're the trainer, or the trainee ....

Your additions clarified things very well and although you dont see yourself falling under this description many men do. The artical may sound bad but unfortunitly is very true to alot of men.

[spare_change]

Your additions clarified things very well and although you dont see yourself falling under this description many men do. The artical may sound bad but unfortunitly is very true to alot of men.


Many men are helpless little lapdogs who will do anything you ask just for the promise of getting laid?


Not where I come from ...

[GeekMaster]

Many men are helpless little lapdogs who will do anything you ask just for the promise of getting laid?


Not where I come from ...


Ditto!!!

[fourisit]

Many men are helpless little lapdogs who will do anything you ask just for the promise of getting laid?


Not where I come from ...

I was not talking about a lap dog..I was talking about being lazy, self important, ungrateful, pathetic, did I say lazy yet, men who think there only contribution to the running of the house hold is to take out the trash. What makes them more important that when they come home from work they get to sit on there butt all night while the wife runs herself ragged doing "womens work". Come on dont act like this is a surprise to you. If the promise of getting laid is all it takes to get him motivated I say dangle that carrot for all your worth girls!!

[Me]

I was not talking about a lap dog..I was talking about being lazy, self important, ungrateful, pathetic, did I say lazy yet, men who think there only contribution to the running of the house hold is to take out the trash. What makes them more important that when they come home from work they get to sit on there butt all night while the wife runs herself ragged doing "womens work". Come on dont act like this is a surprise to you. If the promise of getting laid is all it takes to get him motivated I say dangle that carrot for all your worth girls!!


:55

[spare_change]

I was not talking about a lap dog..I was talking about being lazy, self important, ungrateful, pathetic, did I say lazy yet, men who think there only contribution to the running of the house hold is to take out the trash. What makes them more important that when they come home from work they get to sit on there butt all night while the wife runs herself ragged doing "womens work". Come on dont act like this is a surprise to you. If the promise of getting laid is all it takes to get him motivated I say dangle that carrot for all your worth girls!!


Wow -- do I sense a little hostility here? I think it is important that we paint all men with the same brush ... it makes it so much easier.

I guess it comes down to a matter of priorities .... if that new car is so important that you need a second income to "survive", then the chores are the price to be paid. If, on the other hand, your family is more important than that new car, there is a price to be paid there, too.

I feel bad that you think so poorly of men ... I can assure you they aren't ALL like you have painted them. Judging them all thru that prism will only give you a distorted view.

[TLChandler]

If this is so then I must be the sexiest man around , cause I havent stopped taking her :lmao

[Cotties]

I support role playing....but this goes too far

[TLChandler]

I support role playing....but this goes too far

Then why play roles ? PLay reality.

[kaycee727(m)]

My wife is so lazy and the worst house keeper. If I didn't do some of the cleaning or house work it would never get done. If anyone out there needs a live in maid I am ready willing and able. It would only cost you some sexual favors.

[TLChandler]

Sorry but dont think I am ya're type ! But if female wants help just let me know and will show up in frenchmaid outfit

[Zarret]

House chores are not a problem here. My husband will always help with the cleaning and cooking and he is the one who runs most of the errands. Laundry.....I don't let him do that. He makes things change color :D

[duanehofner]

The only arousal my wife gets from me doing housework, is the thoughts of what other house work I can do!

[private beaches]

My husband wants a buxom French maid to come help out with the housework.
I want the chippendale guy. Hmmm, maybe we could reach a compromise-:D

[trucker200719]

well i don't agree with the article i no i am gone all week but when i am at home on the weekends i do all the cooking and clean the kitchen and bathroom, i also work on the vechicals and don't ask her to help(witch she would look at me and laugh if i did) and i still practically have beg to get laid. i am just so tired of the game thats played out

[Torin]

Wow -- do I sense a little hostility here? I think it is important that we paint all men with the same brush ... it makes it so much easier.

I guess it comes down to a matter of priorities .... if that new car is so important that you need a second income to "survive", then the chores are the price to be paid. If, on the other hand, your family is more important than that new car, there is a price to be paid there, too.

I feel bad that you think so poorly of men ... I can assure you they aren't ALL like you have painted them. Judging them all thru that prism will only give you a distorted view.

I don't think this article applies to all men. There are exceptions to everything, and this type of generalization is not fair to men. I completely agree with you on that. I took a more humorous spin off of the article, because honestly, it doesn't really apply in my life. My husband DOES help, and our chores are not gender specific, in the traditional way. I am more than happy to do the "man chores" such as mowing the grass and changing the oil, and my husband does the laundry, etc, as he sees that it needs done, NOT because I offer him sex in exchange. He does it simply because he veiws our home as something we create together, and the maintenence of it is both of our responsibility. I really appreciate that, as I do work as well (although from home) and take care of our children all day. And we do have sex almost every day. I don't know that the two are related. But it is a possibility... I have not examined my motivation in having sex much beyond, "Damn, I want him."

A woman doing all the work was not so much of an issue before women HAD to work, to be able to survive in today's society. But it is unfair to expect a woman to work, raise children, and clean the entire house while a man works the same number of hours, and gets to come home and lay on the couch playing X-box. NOT all men do this, but if MY man did this, I know it would build resentment in me. Unfortunately, many men that I know personally in real life actually DO this....

In my opinion, the men on this website are exceptions to many of the sterotypes that are typically used... just as the women of this site are. I can see why this article is insulting to men. But it does not change the fact that this article is describing a very real "type" of man.

[househub]

stop over any day and be aroused as much as you want

[qazed]

I have even gone as far as tell my wife that would switch places with her and stay home with our son and do the housework if she would go out and get a job making as much as I do.

She hasn't started looking for a job yet.

[Me]

Wow -- do I sense a little hostility here? I think it is important that we paint all men with the same brush ... it makes it so much easier.

I guess it comes down to a matter of priorities .... if that new car is so important that you need a second income to "survive", then the chores are the price to be paid. If, on the other hand, your family is more important than that new car, there is a price to be paid there, too.

I feel bad that you think so poorly of men ... I can assure you they aren't ALL like you have painted them. Judging them all thru that prism will only give you a distorted view.

First of all....lets clear something up. I DO NOT work so I can have a new car or any other toy. I work firstly, because I have to in order to survive. Secondly because I choose to work because I deserve to have that kind of worth in the community. I am completely offended that you imply that my family is less important than a new car. My family is my #1 and my daughter looks up to me because of what I do.
I also agree that this does not apply to all men. But unfortunately it applies to many of our husbands. It is a true and honest issuse for many of us. And I for one am insulted by the implication that a woman should stay at home and take care of these things.
Lastly...to those of you that do respect and honor your wifes enough to help out and not generalize the housework as HER job....I look up to you and respect what you do for her.
As far as the sex goes....it will not solve everone's issues...but for some that little break in her day would help her feel relaxed and loved enough to make love to her husband.

[Barkiss]

I don't think this article applies to all men. There are exceptions to everything, and this type of generalization is not fair to men. I completely agree with you on that. I took a more humorous spin off of the article, because honestly, it doesn't really apply in my life. My husband DOES help, and our chores are not gender specific, in the traditional way. I am more than happy to do the "man chores" such as mowing the grass and changing the oil, and my husband does the laundry, etc, as he sees that it needs done, NOT because I offer him sex in exchange. He does it simply because he veiws our home as something we create together, and the maintenence of it is both of our responsibility. I really appreciate that, as I do work as well (although from home) and take care of our children all day. And we do have sex almost every day. I don't know that the two are related. But it is a possibility... I have not examined my motivation in having sex much beyond, "Damn, I want him."

A woman doing all the work was not so much of an issue before women HAD to work, to be able to survive in today's society. But it is unfair to expect a woman to work, raise children, and clean the entire house while a man works the same number of hours, and gets to come home and lay on the couch playing X-box. NOT all men do this, but if MY man did this, I know it would build resentment in me. Unfortunately, many men that I know personally in real life actually DO this....

In my opinion, the men on this website are exceptions to many of the sterotypes that are typically used... just as the women of this site are. I can see why this article is insulting to men. But it does not change the fact that this article is describing a very real "type" of man.

Excellent point...but I hope this article does not pertain to all women either. It appears to me that it generalizes female wants and needs also...

[Me]

Excellent point...but I hope this article does not pertain to all women either. It appears to me that it generalizes female wants and needs also...

Agreed

[SunnyD]

Can't say it does anything extra for me, but he has always done housework. But to be completely fair the cleaning lady does nothing for me either!

[qazed]

Thats what we need... a cleaning lady.

[Cotties]

still a bit wound up I see...I haven't even met you and you have no respect for me....


housework girls job.....me drink beer... me happy ..I buy you diamonds to show love...

so really...my wife is on to a good thing...she likes to clean.I don't..and she can buy beer that turns into expensive jewellery over night...friggin genious in her opinion and she gets to be boss
First of all....lets clear something up. I DO NOT work so I can have a new car or any other toy. I work firstly, because I have to in order to survive. Secondly because I choose to work because I deserve to have that kind of worth in the community. I am completely offended that you imply that my family is less important than a new car. My family is my #1 and my daughter looks up to me because of what I do.
I also agree that this does not apply to all men. But unfortunately it applies to many of our husbands. It is a true and honest issuse for many of us. And I for one am insulted by the implication that a woman should stay at home and take care of these things.
Lastly...to those of you that do respect and honor your wifes enough to help out and not generalize the housework as HER job....I look up to you and respect what you do for her.
As far as the sex goes....it will not solve everone's issues...but for some that little break in her day would help her feel relaxed and loved enough to make love to her husband.

[trucker200719]

Thats what we need... a cleaning lady.
not sure that is always the best answer when i was 15 my mom had a cleaning lady and she ended up being the first lady i slept with while my mom was at work ..then again ur kids might like that idea....

[Atrebla Rose]

My wife is so lazy and the worst house keeper. If I didn't do some of the cleaning or house work it would never get done. If anyone out there needs a live in maid I am ready willing and able. It would only cost you some sexual favors.

is that like screwing you to the bed to get the housework done? :D :knuddel:

[FLfire4u(m)]

Ring Ring....:kk:wa:


OH yea Baby, I'm on the next plane up. Do me a favor and get the water ready. :D :knuddel:

[Me]

still a bit wound up I see...I haven't even met you and you have no respect for me....


housework girls job.....me drink beer... me happy ..I buy you diamonds to show love...

so really...my wife is on to a good thing...she likes to clean.I don't..and she can buy beer that turns into expensive jewellery over night...friggin genious in her opinion and she gets to be boss


:lmao :lmao :lmao funny...that works too!

[fourisit]

Wow -- do I sense a little hostility here? I think it is important that we paint all men with the same brush ... it makes it so much easier.

I guess it comes down to a matter of priorities .... if that new car is so important that you need a second income to "survive", then the chores are the price to be paid. If, on the other hand, your family is more important than that new car, there is a price to be paid there, too.

I feel bad that you think so poorly of men ... I can assure you they aren't ALL like you have painted them. Judging them all thru that prism will only give you a distorted view.

Damn right you sense hostility. You really should actually read the posts before you climb up on your pulpit. I never said ALL MEN were like that.
It must be nice to be so perfect but unfortunitly not all men are.

As for the whole car thing I dont really follow that at all. The decision to need a second car or second income do not in any way have a connection to who does the household chores. There should not be "a price to pay" because of either of those choices. Both people in a realtionship should give equally but in reality that doesnt always happen.

I dont think "poorly" of men in general. Just the ones that are lazy as I said in my post. If you dont fall in that catagory then you have nothing to get all bent out of shape about do you? I have a crystal clear view thank you. I have lived with him everyday for the last 13 years and I have talked to alot of girlfriends with the same issues as well as talked to many men here who dont have the same issues so I have not lumped them all in the same catagory.

[Sunfiresix]

I have always done at least half the housework--now I do it all and I don't mind it keeps me busy--I will never be as good at it as my wife is, women just do it better(cleaning that is--well some other things too)

[Nomad(m)]

A bit of a touchy subject here..


Lastly...to those of you that do respect and honor your wifes enough to help out and not generalize the housework as HER job....I look up to you and respect what you do for her.
As far as the sex goes....it will not solve everone's issues...but for some that little break in her day would help her feel relaxed and loved enough to make love to her husband.

I do pitch in around the house as much as I can. Wash dishes, bath the kids(just last night), I do take out the trash, I try with the laundry, but mess this one up sometimes, so she would rather do this. Not because I think I am going to get some lovin, but because I want a clean house and enjoy doing this for my family. If I had more time to do this, I would do more. I think I am begining to understand a womans thought process more after reading Jelly's comment. Women want to feel loved and respected. One way of showing this is by becoming more involved around the house, shows that we care enough, right? I dont think men view this the same, but we can all learn a lesson here.

[cherokeered]

Must be nice to have someone to share the responsibility of daily living with...maybe someday before I die I'll have that....in my dreams most likely

[Nomad(m)]

Can't say it does anything extra for me, but he has always done housework. But to be completely fair the cleaning lady does nothing for me either!

I am assuming you mean the cleaning lady does nothing for you sexually, right? I think the cleaning lady is a wise investment for those who have an issue with this subject. It can take away some of the PITA (pain in the ass) chores from either side, like toilets, showers, floors. Send your clothes to the dry cleaner too. Realitively inexpensive, but worth there weight in gold from the overload factor by many women who are doing 2 full time jobs.

[Me]

A bit of a touchy subject here..



I do pitch in around the house as much as I can. Wash dishes, bath the kids(just last night), I do take out the trash, I try with the laundry, but mess this one up sometimes, so she would rather do this. Not because I think I am going to get some lovin, but because I want a clean house and enjoy doing this for my family. If I had more time to do this, I would do more. I think I am begining to understand a womans thought process more after reading Jelly's comment. Women want to feel loved and respected. One way of showing this is by becoming more involved around the house, shows that we care enough, right? I dont think men view this the same, but we can all learn a lesson here.

:hug: hugs cause u deserve one! What a smart man ;)

[Nomad(m)]

:hug: hugs cause u deserve one! What a smart man ;)

I guess I never understood this before, or had it explained to me in the way you did. Men view sex as a sign of love and emotion, so the more we get, the more we feel loved. I think for a woman, this works the opposite. In order to have sex, they need to feel loved and respected first, and one way of showing love, is to help out around the house.

This may be an epiphany of some sorts for many. Am I off the mark?

Thanks for the hug, its been a while. Heres one back, but I cant find the hug icon....

[Me]

I guess I never understood this before, or had it explained to me in the way you did. Men view sex as a sign of love and emotion, so the more we get, the more we feel loved. I think for a woman, this works the opposite. In order to have sex, they need to feel loved and respected first, and one way of showing love, is to help out around the house.

This may be an epiphany of some sorts for many. Am I off the mark?

Thanks for the hug, its been a while. Heres one back, but I cant find the hug icon....


EXACTLY!!! R u sure u didn't already know this??? ;)

[Hotshotfireguy]

I do all my own laundry, and others if it needs to be done at that time. I am not allowed to touch the wifes laundry (something bout a shrunken sweater really pisses them off :lmao ) . As far as the other stuff, I guess I am a little old school. Having two teenagers and an almost teenager, we have built in vacumers and dishwashers :D . I do all the outdoor stuff, which is great, lawnmower time is my "me time". Put on the stereo headphones climb on the mower and take off. But nothing is granted as anybody's "certain" job. If it needs to be done, it just gets done by whoever sees it first. And, hell, I can't hardly get sex any other time, so haven't ever seen where doin housework makes a difference in that category.

[Nomad(m)]

EXACTLY!!! R u sure u didn't already know this??? ;)

I have read a few books, but they didnt give me the revalation you just did, or make the point in a way that I understood.

I do these things out of love and respect for my family, b/c I want to. I dont know that it has helped in the bedroom though.

[Shafe]

It's all about being a partner. If one person's doing everything, they're going to feel like the maid. If the chores are shared equally, it (in theory anyway) should bring the relationship closer together with teamwork. I've never had a woman tell me it turns them on, though :)

Just stopped in for a second while the dishwasher was running. Now I'm off to vaccuum the floors and take out the garbage before it's done and I put the dishes away! :D

[Zarret]

My husband wants a buxom French maid to come help out with the housework.
I want the chippendale guy. Hmmm, maybe we could reach a compromise-:D

Yup a chippendale in a french maid outfit :lmao

[fourisit]

A bit of a touchy subject here..



I do pitch in around the house as much as I can. Wash dishes, bath the kids(just last night), I do take out the trash, I try with the laundry, but mess this one up sometimes, so she would rather do this. Not because I think I am going to get some lovin, but because I want a clean house and enjoy doing this for my family. If I had more time to do this, I would do more. I think I am begining to understand a womans thought process more after reading Jelly's comment. Women want to feel loved and respected. One way of showing this is by becoming more involved around the house, shows that we care enough, right? I dont think men view this the same, but we can all learn a lesson here.

It is nice to have someone actually read the post and try to see where we are coming from instead of shooting it down as stupid. Your wife is a very lucky girl and I hope she appreciates you.

[sweet]

Yup a chippendale in a french maid outfit :lmao

LOL! Now that's hot!

[Zarret]

stop over any day and be aroused as much as you want

Ok, I'll bring the pledge and we can polish you up hmmmmmm:D

[Nomad(m)]

It is nice to have someone actually read the post and try to see where we are coming from instead of shooting it down as stupid. Your wife is a very lucky girl and I hope she appreciates you.

Isnt that why we are here? Arent we all trying to grow and learn something?

Thanks, and I hope she appreciates me too.

[spare_change]

Damn right you sense hostility. You really should actually read the posts before you climb up on your pulpit. I never said ALL MEN were like that.
It must be nice to be so perfect but unfortunitly not all men are.

As for the whole car thing I dont really follow that at all. The decision to need a second car or second income do not in any way have a connection to who does the household chores. There should not be "a price to pay" because of either of those choices. Both people in a realtionship should give equally but in reality that doesnt always happen.

I dont think "poorly" of men in general. Just the ones that are lazy as I said in my post. If you dont fall in that catagory then you have nothing to get all bent out of shape about do you? I have a crystal clear view thank you. I have lived with him everyday for the last 13 years and I have talked to alot of girlfriends with the same issues as well as talked to many men here who dont have the same issues so I have not lumped them all in the same catagory.

I didn't climb on a pulpit -- I offered an observation. I find the article to be demeaning and dismissive of men in general. I am highly offended by the characterizations and tone of the article .... as, apparently, were some other men who commented here. Last time I checked, we ARE allowed to have our own opinions, and we ARE allowed to express them here.

As for the other, clearly the article targets working married women. Yale University did a study in 2004 that showed that 1) 94% of all working women say they work because they have to, 2) of that 94%, only 13% actually did have to. The remaining 87% worked in order to improve their lifestyle (buy a new car is an easy example - have a larger house - etc, etc, etc).

I do financial management counseling - I deal with couples every day. My personal experience mirrors the findings of the Yale study. There was also a corollary study conducted by Yale at the same time. They investigated the real reason women worked ... for approximately 78%, the real reason was to improve lifestyle .... 13% was to get out of the house ... and 5% was to avoid the rigor and routine of motherhood.

Yale did a follow-up study in 2006 that showed that, in 68% of households, the fact that the woman was working actually COST the household money. The concordant increase in cost of living was not offset by the income earned.

The second car didn't have anything to do with it? If the assumption is that the person is a stay-at-home wife, wouldn't it seem unfair that the husband should be asked to be the sole breadwinner AND come home to do laundry? Where was her commitment? What is her contribution?

But, more basic than that, I am extremely offended at the idea of using sex as a bargaining chip -- whether it is to get a bigger diamond or to get the dishes washed. Too many women get into the ... "if you do this, than I'll do that" mode. It demeans the relationship, and it demeans both the seller and the buyer --- because, in the end, that is exactly what it is ---- a business arrangement. I guess you don't have to get money to be considered a prostitute ... sometimes, trading it for the laundry being ironed qualifies as well.

[cherokeered]

I didn't climb on a pulpit -- I offered an observation. I find the article to be demeaning and dismissive of men in general. I am highly offended by the characterizations and tone of the article .... as, apparently, were some other men who commented here. Last time I checked, we ARE allowed to have our own opinions, and we ARE allowed to express them here.

As for the other, clearly the article targets working married women. Yale University did a study in 2004 that showed that 1) 94% of all working women say they work because they have to, 2) of that 94%, only 13% actually did have to. The remaining 87% worked in order to improve their lifestyle (buy a new car is an easy example - have a larger house - etc, etc, etc).

I do financial management counseling - I deal with couples every day. My personal experience mirrors the findings of the Yale study. There was also a corollary study conducted by Yale at the same time. They investigated the real reason women worked ... for approximately 78%, the real reason was to improve lifestyle .... 13% was to get out of the house ... and 5% was to avoid the rigor and routine of motherhood.

Yale did a follow-up study in 2006 that showed that, in 68% of households, the fact that the woman was working actually COST the household money. The concordant increase in cost of living was not offset by the income earned.

The second car didn't have anything to do with it? If the assumption is that the person is a stay-at-home wife, wouldn't it seem unfair that the husband should be asked to be the sole breadwinner AND come home to do laundry? Where was her commitment? What is her contribution?

But, more basic than that, I am extremely offended at the idea of using sex as a bargaining chip -- whether it is to get a bigger diamond or to get the dishes washed. Too many women get into the ... "if you do this, than I'll do that" mode. It demeans the relationship, and it demeans both the seller and the buyer --- because, in the end, that is exactly what it is ---- a business arrangement. I guess you don't have to get money to be considered a prostitute ... sometimes, trading it for the laundry being ironed qualifies as well.
Please don't even get me started on this.....

I work full time in corproate finance.....my hubby is a blue collar worker in a small company....I earn more (not a lot mind you), do 95% of the household crap, pay 95% of the bills, provide 100% of the medical coverage and retirement money......

So, how is this fair? I sleep on a couch..he sleeps in a king-size bed I paid for....I put all my check in the bank to pay all the bills I have to ( mortgage 100%, car payment 100%, car insurance 100%, food 100%, utilities 100%), he does what he wants with his money and complains when he has to pay a bill......I have a pension & 401K...he has nothing....I supply the medical coverage...he has none....
So don't ever think all women or all men are the same and that situations are the same....they aren't...statistcs mean nothing in the real world....
as for demeaning a relationship...well servitude is demeaning

[fourisit]

I guess we will have to agree to disagree here since you are a professional I would hate to go aginst your opinion.

[cherokeered]

[QUOTE=fourisit]I guess we will have to agree to disagree here since you are a professional I would hate to go aginst your opinion.[/QUOTE


lol....

[Torin]

I didn't climb on a pulpit -- I offered an observation. I find the article to be demeaning and dismissive of men in general. I am highly offended by the characterizations and tone of the article .... as, apparently, were some other men who commented here. Last time I checked, we ARE allowed to have our own opinions, and we ARE allowed to express them here.

As for the other, clearly the article targets working married women. Yale University did a study in 2004 that showed that 1) 94% of all working women say they work because they have to, 2) of that 94%, only 13% actually did have to. The remaining 87% worked in order to improve their lifestyle (buy a new car is an easy example - have a larger house - etc, etc, etc).

I do financial management counseling - I deal with couples every day. My personal experience mirrors the findings of the Yale study. There was also a corollary study conducted by Yale at the same time. They investigated the real reason women worked ... for approximately 78%, the real reason was to improve lifestyle .... 13% was to get out of the house ... and 5% was to avoid the rigor and routine of motherhood.

Yale did a follow-up study in 2006 that showed that, in 68% of households, the fact that the woman was working actually COST the household money. The concordant increase in cost of living was not offset by the income earned.

The second car didn't have anything to do with it? If the assumption is that the person is a stay-at-home wife, wouldn't it seem unfair that the husband should be asked to be the sole breadwinner AND come home to do laundry? Where was her commitment? What is her contribution?

But, more basic than that, I am extremely offended at the idea of using sex as a bargaining chip -- whether it is to get a bigger diamond or to get the dishes washed. Too many women get into the ... "if you do this, than I'll do that" mode. It demeans the relationship, and it demeans both the seller and the buyer --- because, in the end, that is exactly what it is ---- a business arrangement. I guess you don't have to get money to be considered a prostitute ... sometimes, trading it for the laundry being ironed qualifies as well.

Sooooooo.... let me get this straight. If I feel sexual after noticing my husband doing a kind, small household chore, I am a prostitute? :sc So, by that same standard... if my husband gets aroused by the fact that I packed him a special lunch, with a love note inside, then HE is the prostitute?

What is wrong with a loving, generous act leading to sex? It's not as if sex is "used as a bargaining chip"... We dont sit down at the table, and draw out a contract. I still don't understand why seeing a man doing household chores arousing a woman is such a bad thing.

It's all about EFFORT. If I see him making an effort to be kind or helpful to me (in ANY way) it just melts me. It reminds me that he loves me, and is committed to making our lives happier. And it goes both ways.

[spare_change]

I guess we will have to agree to disagree here since you are a professional I would hate to go aginst your opinion.



.... or, you could just admit you were wrong. That would work.

[Me]

.... or, you could just admit you were wrong. That would work.

or, you could step back and realize you yourself have made several sexist remarks and admit that YOU are wrong too. Imagine

[RedVixen]

Back to *on-topic*: I've never been turned on with the husband doing housework. Appreciative, yes - turned on, no.

[Shawn]

Wow...just read all these posts...looks like a hot topic.

My 2 cents, I can not ...nor would not speak for anyone other than myself. With that being said, to me it doing "housework" is just part of the relationship, if I do dishes or fold laundry I do not feel that sex should be the pay off, but more importantly I would not want my wife to feel that she has to "give it up" to reward me either.

When did it become what they do vs what we do?....I know its a touchy subject for many but my perspective is we are in it together...no one WANTS to spend their day cleaning, and doing the chores...but we do it, now if the other thinks "they" are just going to sit on their ass while the other slaves away...seems to me that is going to only be met with a lot resentment, and it should.

My wife works, as do I ...she makes sacrifices as do I ..as far as using housework for sex... who has the time?...I've got these dishes to do!

[Me]

Wow...just read all these posts...looks like a hot topic.

My 2 cents, I can not ...nor would not speak for anyone other than myself. With that being said, to me it doing "housework" is just part of the relationship, if I do dishes or fold laundry I do not feel that sex should be the pay off, but more importantly I would not want my wife to feel that she has to "give it up" to reward me either.

When did it become what they do vs what we do?....I know its a touchy subject for many but my perspective is we are in it together...no one WANTS to spend their day cleaning, and doing the chores...but we do it, now if the other thinks "they" are just going to sit on their ass while the other slaves away...seems to me that is going to only be met with a lot resentment, and it should.

My wife works, as do I ...she makes sacrifices as do I ..as far as using housework for sex... who has the time?...I've got these dishes to do!

:kk

[Micwar]

Hell just live in a hotel then the problem goes away........

[Annie]

Sooooooo.... let me get this straight. If I feel sexual after noticing my husband doing a kind, small household chore, I am a prostitute? :sc So, by that same standard... if my husband gets aroused by the fact that I packed him a special lunch, with a love note inside, then HE is the prostitute?

What is wrong with a loving, generous act leading to sex? It's not as if sex is "used as a bargaining chip"... We dont sit down at the table, and draw out a contract. I still don't understand why seeing a man doing household chores arousing a woman is such a bad thing.

It's all about EFFORT. If I see him making an effort to be kind or helpful to me (in ANY way) it just melts me. It reminds me that he loves me, and is committed to making our lives happier. And it goes both ways.
Exactly! It melts me, I think of it as his "love in action"!

[1hotrod]

I don't know....I have worn the French Maid outfit when I clean the house....Doesn't seem to do anything for my wife....I get a little worked up though;)

No one really likes to do the house work...but when you just do it when it needs to be done eather of you its not that bad.....weather the wife works outside the house or not has nothing to do with it. It is both your house so both should take care of it. In our house if one cooks the other cleans not a contract just common sense.

Just my thoughts and what works for us. Now I will crawl back out of this can of worms...

[sweet]

Wow...just read all these posts...looks like a hot topic.

My 2 cents, I can not ...nor would not speak for anyone other than myself. With that being said, to me it doing "housework" is just part of the relationship, if I do dishes or fold laundry I do not feel that sex should be the pay off, but more importantly I would not want my wife to feel that she has to "give it up" to reward me either.

When did it become what they do vs what we do?....I know its a touchy subject for many but my perspective is we are in it together...no one WANTS to spend their day cleaning, and doing the chores...but we do it, now if the other thinks "they" are just going to sit on their ass while the other slaves away...seems to me that is going to only be met with a lot resentment, and it should.

My wife works, as do I ...she makes sacrifices as do I ..as far as using housework for sex... who has the time?...I've got these dishes to do!

Wanna come over and help me with my dishes too? lol
Great post hun :kk

[Barkiss]

I don't know....I have worn the French Maid outfit when I clean the house....Doesn't seem to do anything for my wife....I get a little worked up though;)

No one really likes to do the house work...but when you just do it when it needs to be done eather of you its not that bad.....weather the wife works outside the house or not has nothing to do with it. It is both your house so both should take care of it. In our house if one cooks the other cleans not a contract just common sense.

Just my thoughts and what works for us. Now I will crawl back out of this can of worms...

Sounds like my house. I suppose, based on reading everyone's responses, my wife does not get aroused when I do housework, because I've been doing it well before I met her. To me it is just something that has to get done, and I'm a person to do it.

Maybe I should stop for a while...then I could start back up and see if it works.

[Annie]

Sounds like my house. I suppose, based on reading everyone's responses, my wife does not get aroused when I do housework, because I've been doing it well before I met her. To me it is just something that has to get done, and I'm a person to do it.

Maybe I should stop for a while...then I could start back up and see if it works.or you could try doing wearing nothing but an apron... always works for Andrew!

[Barkiss]

or you could try doing wearing nothing but an apron... always works for Andrew!

What makes you think that I'm not already doing that??? ;)

[cherokeered]

Seems to me the men who share the household jobs with their spouse are probably taken for granted a bit....and those of us who don't get the help, well we feel taken for granted.....and would it turn me on, probably not....but it might make me feel more like a partner and more appreciated or thought of....which I guess could make me feel more warm and fuzzy towards him....
But at this stage....it wouldn't help....sigh

[Nomad(m)]

Suffice it to say, I think many of us will have differing opinions on this one. :sc

[sweet]

What makes you think that I'm not already doing that??? ;)

I'm gonna have to see a picture of that! :D

[Barkiss]

I'm gonna have to see a picture of that! :D

I e-mailed it...enjoy ;)

[Me]

Seems to me the men who share the household jobs with their spouse are probably taken for granted a bit....and those of us who don't get the help, well we feel taken for granted.....and would it turn me on, probably not....but it might make me feel more like a partner and more appreciated or thought of....which I guess could make me feel more warm and fuzzy towards him....
But at this stage....it wouldn't help....sigh


I agree...I am amazed at the help some of the guys here are actually giving their wives! Points to them!!! :kk

[Shawn]

I agree...I am amazed at the help some of the guys here are actually giving their wives! Points to them!!! :kk


Or we know we can lie and get away with it:55

[Lacey]

I've talked about this before,in another thread. I do 100% of the housework,and I work, it started out as part time ,but now it's a normal work week for me,I make almost as much money as he does.But he also gets weekends off, gets to enjoy Holidays,and basically does whatever he wants with his free time.While I have another job waiting at home for me,with no days off.And he does have a habit to think if he takes out the trash,that he did me a favor,and in turn I owe him.It doesn't work well for him.My point being ,I understand what these women are saying,in most homes it's the women who are responsible for the house work.And it get's tiresome and you do start resenting the fact that it's all on you,and then when your day is almost over and your ready to just drop,and all you can think of is going to sleep,there they are waiting to be serviced.*sighs*

[Misty]

Just as much as he is, seeing me do housework...... but not all the time or we'd never get the work done :D:D:D:D

[cherokeered]

I've talked about this before,in another thread. I do 100% of the housework,and I work, it started out as part time ,but now it's a normal work week for me,I make almost as much money as he does.But he also gets weekends off, gets to enjoy Holidays,and basically does whatever he wants with his free time.While I have another job waiting at home for me,with no days off.And he does have a habit to think if he takes out the trash,that he did me a favor,and in turn I owe him.It doesn't work well for him.My point being ,I understand what these women are saying,in most homes it's the women who are responsible for the house work.And it get's tiresome and you do start resenting the fact that it's all on you,and then when your day is almost over and your ready to just drop,and all you can think of is going to sleep,there they are waiting to be serviced.*sighs*

I love that...the little thing they do and think, hey look what I did for you....lol
My hubby will rinse out the petfood cans....but leave behind a dirty sink, unwashed silverware and dishes now covered in petfood.....all for me...how generous...huh
or I clean the stove top...and the next thing I know, there are spots of dripped petfood on it...and picese under the grates....just for me to clean....
these are the "gifts" given to me on a daily basis....

[Nomad(m)]

Is it fair that if you start to do an additional thing at home, like put the dishes in the dishwasher, that if you dont continue to do it, the other gets annoyed? Or to say it another way, should it become routine? I think this is where people get taken for granted.

[Lacey]

I love that...the little thing they do and think, hey look what I did for you....lol
My hubby will rinse out the petfood cans....but leave behind a dirty sink, unwashed silverware and dishes now covered in petfood.....all for me...how generous...huh
or I clean the stove top...and the next thing I know, there are spots of dripped petfood on it...and picese under the grates....just for me to clean....
these are the "gifts" given to me on a daily basis....



LOL.........mine does things like that too!!

[skinnyone]

As I sit here typing this, I have one load of laundry in the washer and one in the dryer.
I have already done most of the laundry and put it away, for me, my wife, my son and my daughter. Since I am off on Friday's, this is my routine and I regularly help or do most of the household cleanup. I don't do it for sex, although, it would be nice but I do it as my part of our relationship. Believe me, I would love for sex to be the payoff but I know that it won't be. I think I can look forward to having sex sometime in May but that is the subject of another thread.

It is frustrating to me that my wife doesn't help more around the house but I can't make her. Even when she does, usually, I have to go behind her and do it again.
I am ALWAYS cleaning up behind her too.

[spare_change]

Sooooooo.... let me get this straight. If I feel sexual after noticing my husband doing a kind, small household chore, I am a prostitute? :sc So, by that same standard... if my husband gets aroused by the fact that I packed him a special lunch, with a love note inside, then HE is the prostitute?

What is wrong with a loving, generous act leading to sex? It's not as if sex is "used as a bargaining chip"... We dont sit down at the table, and draw out a contract. I still don't understand why seeing a man doing household chores arousing a woman is such a bad thing.

It's all about EFFORT. If I see him making an effort to be kind or helpful to me (in ANY way) it just melts me. It reminds me that he loves me, and is committed to making our lives happier. And it goes both ways.


Yes, let's get this straight .... nobody said anything about a gift, freely given, without strings or expectations ..

What was said, however, was "If the promise of getting laid is all it takes to get him motivated I say dangle that carrot for all your worth girls!!"

I'm sorry -- in my opinion, that is sexist, dismissive, and demeaning. Any way I read that, it comes out "I'll trade this for that ...", and that qualifies as a business transaction.

[cherokeered]

As I sit here typing this, I have one load of laundry in the washer and one in the dryer.
I have already done most of the laundry and put it away, for me, my wife, my son and my daughter. Since I am off on Friday's, this is my routine and I regularly help or do most of the household cleanup. I don't do it for sex, although, it would be nice but I do it as my part of our relationship. Believe me, I would love for sex to be the payoff but I know that it won't be. I think I can look forward to having sex sometime in May but that is the subject of another thread.

It is frustrating to me that my wife doesn't help more around the house but I can't make her. Even when she does, usually, I have to go behind her and do it again.
I am ALWAYS cleaning up behind her too.

This is most likely why she doesn't bother....if you said thanks for doing that, instead of...let me do it, ya did it wrong....she might feel more part of the team perhaps....just my opinion of course...
but I think it's great you do what you do...it should never be about being rewarded, it should always be about being part of the team that a marriage is supposed to be....a partnership where both are responsible for keeping the nest clean

[spare_change]

or, you could step back and realize you yourself have made several sexist remarks and admit that YOU are wrong too. Imagine


Sorry -- I'm not the one making generalizations around here. I guess some just bring a more romantic concept to the bed ... it isn't a commodity to be traded. I would, however, challenge you to show me a single sexist remark that I made ...

I welcome the opportunity to disavow such a comment.

[cherokeered]

Yes, let's get this straight .... nobody said anything about a gift, freely given, without strings or expectations ..

What was said, however, was "If the promise of getting laid is all it takes to get him motivated I say dangle that carrot for all your worth girls!!"

I'm sorry -- in my opinion, that is sexist, dismissive, and demeaning. Any way I read that, it comes out "I'll trade this for that ...", and that qualifies as a business transaction.

kinda like if a man buys you dinner or a drink or gives you a gift and figures that allows him to touch your ass, cop a feel or take you to bed????

[Torin]

Yes, let's get this straight .... nobody said anything about a gift, freely given, without strings or expectations ..

What was said, however, was "If the promise of getting laid is all it takes to get him motivated I say dangle that carrot for all your worth girls!!"

I'm sorry -- in my opinion, that is sexist, dismissive, and demeaning. Any way I read that, it comes out "I'll trade this for that ...", and that qualifies as a business transaction.

Spare, I think you need a hug. :hug:

[MCat]

This is most likely why she doesn't bother....if you said thanks for doing that, instead of...let me do it, ya did it wrong....she might feel more part of the team perhaps....just my opinion of course...
but I think it's great you do what you do...it should never be about being rewarded, it should always be about being part of the team that a marriage is supposed to be....a partnership where both are responsible for keeping the nest clean


I doubt he tells her she did it wrong...and I don't think we need to praise or thank each other for doing routine crap around the house. It comes with the partnership....some people are just more willing partners.

There are women slobs and men slobs....if you love them you put up with it and work around it without complaining.

Just my opinion....

[Annie]

kinda like if a man buys you dinner or a drink or gives you a gift and figures that allows him to touch your ass, cop a feel or take you to bed???? BINGO!



... but I'll bet no one here has ever done THAT!

[PunkyBob]

OMG...get over it, people. I get turned on watching my wife do dishes...because her ass is to me and it looks good. She gets turned on watching me chop wood...because it's some kind of many testonerone-y thing. It's not a business deal if I go shopping, do the laundry, mop the floor, feed the animals, etc...it's because we live together and division of labor and all that. We do things for each other, which lets each of us know that we care enough to attend to the mundane stuff and not let it pile up. We generally express our appreciation thru acts of intimate affection... a hug, kiss...sometimes this escalates into all-out sex...sometimes not.

Besides...I'm a much better house cleaner than she is.

[spare_change]

Spare, I think you need a hug. :hug:



What's it going to cost me? Dishes? Laundry? Ironing? :lmao

[MCat]

OMG...get over it, people. I get turned on watching my wife do dishes...because her ass is to me and it looks good. She gets turned on watching me chop wood...because it's some kind of many testonerone-y thing. It's not a business deal if I go shopping, do the laundry, mop the floor, feed the animals, etc...it's because we live together and division of labor and all that. We do things for each other, which lets each of us know that we care enough to attend to the mundane stuff and not let it pile up. We generally express our appreciation thru acts of intimate affection... a hug, kiss...sometimes this escalates into all-out sex...sometimes not.

Besides...I'm a much better house cleaner than she is.

Goooo Punky....:knuddel:

[Torin]

What's it going to cost me? Dishes? Laundry? Ironing? :lmao

Nah, from you all I need is a smile. Even a tiny grin will work. ;)

[Me]

Spare, I think you need a hug. :hug:


ya think?

[Sneaky]

OMG...get over it, people. I get turned on watching my wife do dishes...because her ass is to me and it looks good. She gets turned on watching me chop wood...because it's some kind of many testonerone-y thing. It's not a business deal if I go shopping, do the laundry, mop the floor, feed the animals, etc...it's because we live together and division of labor and all that. We do things for each other, which lets each of us know that we care enough to attend to the mundane stuff and not let it pile up. We generally express our appreciation thru acts of intimate affection... a hug, kiss...sometimes this escalates into all-out sex...sometimes not.

Besides...I'm a much better house cleaner than she is.

:55 Yeah. Although a guy that is helpful helping around the house, and doesn't leave it all up to his wife, will probobly have a more relaxed and willing to be amorous wife. Or, that's how if SHOULD be anyway.

[cherokeered]

OMG...get over it, people. I get turned on watching my wife do dishes...because her ass is to me and it looks good. She gets turned on watching me chop wood...because it's some kind of many testonerone-y thing. It's not a business deal if I go shopping, do the laundry, mop the floor, feed the animals, etc...it's because we live together and division of labor and all that. We do things for each other, which lets each of us know that we care enough to attend to the mundane stuff and not let it pile up. We generally express our appreciation thru acts of intimate affection... a hug, kiss...sometimes this escalates into all-out sex...sometimes not.

Besides...I'm a much better house cleaner than she is.

Yeh, that is nice...when you realize you both are responsible for the mess and are both responsible for the upkeep...:)

[Cotties]

when you use to get upset at me I always use to think it was my fault.....


now I realise it had nothing to do with me.....so I really am perfect after all
Please don't even get me started on this.....

I work full time in corproate finance.....my hubby is a blue collar worker in a small company....I earn more (not a lot mind you), do 95% of the household crap, pay 95% of the bills, provide 100% of the medical coverage and retirement money......

So, how is this fair? I sleep on a couch..he sleeps in a king-size bed I paid for....I put all my check in the bank to pay all the bills I have to ( mortgage 100%, car payment 100%, car insurance 100%, food 100%, utilities 100%), he does what he wants with his money and complains when he has to pay a bill......I have a pension & 401K...he has nothing....I supply the medical coverage...he has none....
So don't ever think all women or all men are the same and that situations are the same....they aren't...statistcs mean nothing in the real world....
as for demeaning a relationship...well servitude is demeaning

[cherokeered]

when you use to get upset at me I always use to think it was my fault.....


now I realise it had nothing to do with me.....so I really am perfect after all


:lmao :lmao .........:kk

[Dir]

My wife is so lazy and the worst house keeper. If I didn't do some of the cleaning or house work it would never get done. If anyone out there needs a live in maid I am ready willing and able. It would only cost you some sexual favors....for me were very expensive rate :D:D your wife should be share with my husb for one day ..i bet at the end of the day they would be able to find themselves in shuch a mess!!!

[scoobertina]

I love a man who will clean house... and if he is sweating I love it even more... I am ready to take him to the shower when he finishes to finish him...


and ohhhhhh... a man in the kitchen... omg.... watching his back side as he is whipping something... yeah... it turns me on alright

[dcowboy09]

I love a man who will clean house... and if he is sweating I love it even more... I am ready to take him to the shower when he finishes to finish him...


and ohhhhhh... a man in the kitchen... omg.... watching his back side as he is whipping something... yeah... it turns me on alright

whipping something? whipping up a batch of pancakes?

[duanehofner]

What's the big deal, I live here too?

[kay1965]

it could be a turn on if hubby would help clean house but ha he never has don't know how . so turn on I wouldn't know .

[kay1965]

whipping something? whipping up a batch of pancakes?


dc is that all that you are whipping ? I doubt that !!!!!!

[surfnchat]

Wow! Great thread with lots of... er... enthusiasm.

As for the article, I wish getting laid was as easy as doing the dishes or vacuuming the floor. For now, I have to rely on giving my wife deep passionate kisses and warm gentle caresses to get her aroused! That's much more work. :D

[Atrebla Rose]

It's all about being a partner. If one person's doing everything, they're going to feel like the maid. If the chores are shared equally, it (in theory anyway) should bring the relationship closer together with teamwork. I've never had a woman tell me it turns them on, though :)

Just stopped in for a second while the dishwasher was running. Now I'm off to vaccuum the floors and take out the garbage before it's done and I put the dishes away! :D


I thought it was about partners too, somewhere along the way it is just me.....I would feel less tired and have alot more time and energy for sex if I wasnt the only one in this relationship. So I guess it would turn me on to have a partner who shared!!! life is so wonderful!!:(

[Sunfiresix]

Dang--I do all the housework where are these panting women????

[OICurready4me]

I love a man who will clean house... and if he is sweating I love it even more... I am ready to take him to the shower when he finishes to finish him...


and ohhhhhh... a man in the kitchen... omg.... watching his back side as he is whipping something... yeah... it turns me on alright

So, a man, giving you a spanking turns you on? then again...spanking a woman turns ME on also....now, to get back to cooking...how about cooking you a big batch of breakfast sausage or a breakfast burritto? You game?

[dave42]

I am the organized one in this household. My wife will pile stuff where ever she can. Things that should be put away in a cabinet are left out. My sons room scares the hell out of me. I might get eaten by something if I went in there! I have no problem running the vacum cleaner,doing the dishes or picking up things. Our least favorite chore is cleaning the bathroom and shower.

[Sensual Woman]

What's the big deal, I live here too?

Hey it is a big deal when a man realizes that and shares in the responsibility...not all men do...just another thing I love about you

[Sylar]

Just to clarify ~

I do not help out around the house so I can get laid. If seeing me help out or pitch in turns her on, fantastic. But it is not the motivation behind helping. I help because I understand and respect how difficult her job is, how tireless, and how neverending. If I can provide a little assistance to show her that I love her, and to give her a break...THAT'S why I do what I do.

...but I do love the gratitude! :D

[Barkiss]

Just to clarify ~

I do not help out around the house so I can get laid. If seeing me help out or pitch in turns her on, fantastic. But it is not the motivation behind helping. I help because I understand and respect how difficult her job is, how tireless, and how neverending. If I can provide a little assistance to show her that I love her, and to give her a break...THAT'S why I do what I do.

...but I do love the gratitude! :D

Yeah yeah...that might work for the girls, but I hope you know us guys are reading right through you...;)

[Sylar]

Yeah yeah...that might work for the girls, but I hope you know us guys are reading right through you...;)


Shhhhhhhh! Dammit Barkiss! At least let me THINK I'm pulling this off! :nu

[duanehofner]

I really love to vacumn. I can't hear her yell ay be because of the noise the thing makes! hehehe

[mower]

Ok I played Mr Mom for the past few years and I am here to tell ya that the laundry imho is one of the hardest things to get right, took me at least 30 loads to figure out what it meant by delicate cycle but finaly got it to where things don't shred LOL
Mower

[hoss]

what is this housework u speak of ...i am not familiar with this activity ...

[dcowboy09]

it may arouse the women but does nothing for me:D

[Dir]

it may arouse the women but does nothing for me:Dmaybe not all is clean:sc ..keep cleaning and try neighbors too maybe it works :D:D:kk

[dcowboy09]

maybe not all is clean:sc ..keep cleaning and try neighbors too maybe it works :D:D:kk

maybe lol should i clean somemore?:D

[dcowboy09]

maybe not all is clean:sc ..keep cleaning and try neighbors too maybe it works :D:D:kk

maybe i need a french maid lol:D

[Annie]

what is this housework u speak of ...i am not familiar with this activity ...Well hun, I hope you are at least re-familiarizing yourself with the fine art of diaper changing!

[real guy]

hi there, lets chat sometime.

[Dir]

maybe i need a french maid lol:D:D:D

[Dir]

maybe lol should i clean somemore?:D:D:D lol i think so ...get something for your knees:D:D

[dcowboy09]

:D:D lol i think so ...get something for your knees:D:D

I don't get on my knees lol that is someone else's area :D

[Wil]

:D:D lol i think so ...get something for your knees:D:D

maybe those hard to reach places D?;)

[Dir]

I don't get on my knees lol that is someone else's area :Dhumm now i understand why the house is not clean enough ..what do you do clean or something else ...hahahah with that french maid :nu:D

[dcowboy09]

humm now i understand why the house is not clean enough ..what do you do clean or something else ...hahahah with that french maid :nu:D

the second part something else, but haven't caught maid yet still chasing :D

[Dir]

the second part something else, but haven't caught maid yet still chasing :D :D....could be because she speaks French :sc:D

[dcowboy09]

:D....could be because she speaks French :sc:D


hmmm could be have to brush up on the french lessons, know a good teacher?:D

[Dir]

hmmm could be have to brush up on the french lessons, know a good teacher?:Dwell i can try but my french still in basic level could teach wrong words make you in trouble :D:D...will look for a nice looking one any suggestions ???

[dcowboy09]

well i can try but my french still in basic level could teach wrong words make you in trouble :D:D...will look for a nice looking one any suggestions ???

on words or teacher?:D

[Dir]

on words or teacher?:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D lol both

[dcowboy09]

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D lol both

well always up for learning new things and words are always a good thing:D

[Dir]

well always up for learning new things and words are always a good thing:D ok then i guess i have the perfect teacher..she may have some little problems but guess would work:D:D ...

[dcowboy09]

ok then i guess i have the perfect teacher..she may have some little problems but guess would work:D:D ...

as long as she is nice and is a good teacher does she give out alot of homework?:D:D

[Dir]

as long as she is nice and is a good teacher does she give out alot of homework?:D:D yes ..specially verbs she thinks that the best way to learn a foreign languages is by alive demonstration ..that is what i referred as little problem....:D:D

[dcowboy09]

yes ..specially verbs she thinks that the best way to learn a foreign languages is by alive demonstration ..that is what i referred as little problem....:D:D


hmmmmmm problems are always worked out in some manner:D

[Dir]

hmmmmmm problems are always worked out in some manner:D yes i know depends how smart are you ...in learning lenguajes ...the slower the more homework ...

[dcowboy09]

yes i know depends how smart are you ...in learning lenguajes ...the slower the more homework ...

hmmm dam i will be doing a lot of homework and probably extra work as well lol:D:D
i am very very slow

[Dir]

hmmm dam i will be doing a lot of homework and probably extra work as well lol:D:D
i am very very slow only for learning languages ?

[dcowboy09]

only for learning languages ?


maybe maybe not, i walk slow does that count lol:D:D

[Dir]

maybe maybe not, i walk slow does that count lol:D:D:D:D:D

[dcowboy09]

:D:D:D


and talk slow :D:D

[Dir]

and talk slow :D:D....:D:D:D me too

[dcowboy09]

....:D:D:D me too

rrrrreeeeeaaaaaaaallllllllllll ssssssssssslllllllloooooowwwwwww :D:D:D:D:D

[cherokeered]

Well, am sitting here listening and watching as hubby cleans the grill up and rinses out some of the petfood cans....heard him move the silverware out of the way...lol
Nope, not doing a thing for me.....:D

[Dir]

rrrrreeeeeaaaaaaaallllllllllll ssssssssssslllllllloooooowwwwwww :D:D:D:D:D well guess i am due to languages problems but according to this ...you ... hem i am sorry for that :D:kk

[dcowboy09]

well guess i am due to languages problems but according to this ...you ... hem i am sorry for that :D:kk

can u help speed me up?:D

[Dir]

can u help speed me up?:D sure i can figure out something :sc:sc

[dcowboy09]

sure i can figure out something :sc:sc

bet u could :D:D

[MIGHTY]

Oh YES! Watching the hubby clean the toilet gets me sooooo very wet! Come on people, soo much I could say about this thread. I do understand how it could be offensive to both men AND women. Me? Hell, he makes dinner for him and my son and I do appreciate that. I work midnight shifts, am freaking tired all of the time, yet still come home in the morning and take out the overflowing trashcan (and the trash on the floor), do the dishes and wipe everything down...this is all before I change out of my work clothes. On my days off every week I do that, and the laundry, and clean the rest of the house as well. I won't even ask him to pitch in anymore, futile. But, when he did help I did not get turned on. When we were sleeping together his cleaning had no effect either way. I understand how it feels to be on the overloaded and unappreciated side of the "partnership". But, I'm sure there is a list of complaints he has for me as well. Resentment can add up quickly, but I believe that lack of sex, or sexual motivation, has soo much more to it than merely sharing chores.

[peteperfect]

I'm going to give it a go, nothing else seames to work at the mo, lol

[Zarret]

As I sit here typing this, I have one load of laundry in the washer and one in the dryer.
I have already done most of the laundry and put it away, for me, my wife, my son and my daughter. Since I am off on Friday's, this is my routine and I regularly help or do most of the household cleanup. I don't do it for sex, although, it would be nice but I do it as my part of our relationship. Believe me, I would love for sex to be the payoff but I know that it won't be. I think I can look forward to having sex sometime in May but that is the subject of another thread.

It is frustrating to me that my wife doesn't help more around the house but I can't make her. Even when she does, usually, I have to go behind her and do it again.
I am ALWAYS cleaning up behind her too.

You can come and clean with me skinny anytime.

[qazed]

Oh YES! Watching the hubby clean the toilet gets me sooooo very wet! Come on people, soo much I could say about this thread. I do understand how it could be offensive to both men AND women. Me? Hell, he makes dinner for him and my son and I do appreciate that. I work midnight shifts, am freaking tired all of the time, yet still come home in the morning and take out the overflowing trashcan (and the trash on the floor), do the dishes and wipe everything down...this is all before I change out of my work clothes. On my days off every week I do that, and the laundry, and clean the rest of the house as well. I won't even ask him to pitch in anymore, futile. But, when he did help I did not get turned on. When we were sleeping together his cleaning had no effect either way. I understand how it feels to be on the overloaded and unappreciated side of the "partnership". But, I'm sure there is a list of complaints he has for me as well. Resentment can add up quickly, but I believe that lack of sex, or sexual motivation, has soo much more to it than merely sharing chores.


I believe this is how my wife feels.

[Zarret]

I'm going to give it a go, nothing else seames to work at the mo, lol

Never give and never say die darlin.....and welcome to the site BTW :wa:

[meow meow]

Especially If They Do It Naked. RAWR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :yks

[learman3]

Right out of high school I got a job for a cleaning service. We had accounts and went to many peoples homes to clean. I dusted, vacuumed, bathrooms, kitchens and even windows. It wasn't that bad, I rather enjoyed it.

[happygirl101]

Do I get turned on when he cleans...Umm Did the wind blow? Did the sun come up? Do we live on Earth...When do I not get turned on! I love being in my 40's, I do, but where in the manual did it say I was going to be horny all the time!!!

[learman3]

Do I get turned on when he cleans...Umm Did the wind blow? Did the sun come up? Do we live on Earth...When do I not get turned on! I love being in my 40's, I do, but where in the manual did it say I was going to be horny all the time!!!
What the hell...either I got the wrong model or it's defective. Does anyone remember there being a manufactures recall?

[dixiechiknga]

Only if he has a dog collar on and I got a whip!