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The Day I Stole The Bat Mobile Pt 1

Posted 12-06-2017 at 11:57 AM by Iceburn
Weird title yeah..I know
And whilst most in here are pouring out their feelings (of which some are truly heart wrenching) here I am..your resident clown with some light relief to shine a little fun into those dark lonely corners for a few minutes.

Before I start..I'd just like to state that I'm truly pissed off right now, I deleted my previous blogs for whatever reason..a fit of pique maybe?..or just fed up with them being up there..who knows?..but...Im particularly vexed because I dont have a copy of my "Slaughterhouse Blues" blog..and I kinda liked that one..so if any blogger was crazy enough to copy that one (he prays hopefully),,,yeah?
I can remember big chunks of it..but I dont think I could re-write it in quite the same way...and that's sad.

Anyways,

This one is gonna be another venture into the crooked childhood of Ice (oh no!..they groan) which makes those weird signs from the Twilight Zone look like welcoming neon riddled directions of warmth and safety.

You would be forgiven for thinking that at some point in my life, I had donned ninja gear and snuck stealthily around the suburbs of Gotham City dodging Police Commissioners and well meaning folk alike, searching for Wayne Mansion and the unlikely depths it contained, hunting for my four wheeled quarry whilst keeping a keen peripheral gaze out for the Boy Wonder and that latex clad fellow in black..but let me stop you right there...no dice.
Once again..Im gonna attempt to take you back to your childhood days with me..if thats ok?

Remember me telling you that those friendships you formed when you were say, eight or nine years old? How utterly binding they seemed, like..you would walk across hot coals for each other should the situation occur or demand?

Yeah...well..forget that shit..my cowardly mates ran hell for leather when they......wait!..Im gettin ahead of the story here..let me start at the beginning, k?

It was already hot when when we met up in the usual place, a barren piece of land littered with the remnants of broken houses and bombed out cars. Cats with ears and fur missing stalked this savage land hunting for field mice, and the occasional half eaten sandwich.There were five of us on that soon to be sweltering day, and we were the most raggedy ass set of urchins you could care to meet. Dressed in our finery of sannies (that's plimsolls or sneakers to you American upstarts)big baggy ass shorts and three sizes too big t-shirts that your mother insisted you wore because "Kids in Africa would be glad to see them"..we gradually assembled..a little like The Avengers assembled...but The Lord of the Flies version right? If you owned a snake belt and had no holes in your soles those days..you were considered "well off"

Like most kids of our time...we had no plan...we laughed...joked around , threw rocks aimlessly and started in on the "mom" jokes. Casting my eyes back over the decades now, it was eerily like the movie "Stand By Me"...but without make up, takes...and direction..oh..and no dead body.Well..not in this particular instance, there wasn't. I can also understand and empathize with the way Richard Dreyfuss was sat in his car, the melancholy creeping up on him as he watched the two kids cycle down the dusty path , remembering how utterly terrifying but at the same time, how fantastically liberating it felt to be that age again.

Once we had exhausted the ritual of parental insults, we did what any other group of nine year old kids would on a hot summer morning without a care in the world. We telepathically got off our asses and went walking. No one picked a direction, not one of us said "oh hey..lets go to..." we just rose...borg like....and all headed off in the same direction at once.Ive often reminisced about this over time..with a furrowed brow thinking of the uncanniness of how you could be so in tune with not just one person, but a whole group of people to the point where it seemed the most natural thing in the world to just do it?..crazy right?

The path we took that day, although I wasnt aware of it at the time, obviously, had trouble written all over it, and me in particular, at the centre of it.There are times in your lives..and Im sure you will all agree with me on this point, where you think to yourself "please God..let me take this back, I want to take the left path in that there fork in the road this time, if you dont mind?..please?"

As I may have mentioned earlier..or at least alluded to, we weren't rich kids..hell..we weren't even comfortable kids..maybe "bones of our asses" kids would fit the bill here. The pocketmoney we were given was probably spent up about three nano seconds from the moment we were handed it...so our "shopping" trips mostly consisted of pressing our grubby little faces up against the local toy store window, drooling over what we would like to have, given the run of the place sans shopkeeper for five minutes or so, and to anyone looking across at this scenario..we must have looked like some weird mini version of The Walking Dead...all arms and pointy fingers, clambering at the huge glass fronted window like there were some tasty humans to be had inside.

tbc
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Old
hijiller's Avatar
I learned hard way. Print out all writings, and keep file online too. My hard drive fizzled and thankfully most of my blogs were here. I printed them all asap.

That's a lot of writing to remember, brother.
Posted 12-06-2017 at 10:46 PM by hijiller hijiller is offline
Old
Bratty's Avatar
I remember the Slaughterhouse Blues!

Going to read all 4 parts before I offer a comment however I'm already smiling.
Posted 12-07-2017 at 11:35 AM by Bratty Bratty is offline
Old
ByronBay's Avatar
Loving the line - 'the path we took that day, although I wasn't aware of it, obviously had trouble written all over it and me in particular at the centre of it'

Hmm! That sounds like you on this forum!! Lol!!
Posted 12-17-2017 at 02:28 PM by ByronBay ByronBay is offline
 
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