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Eli is not the guy

Posted 07-16-2012 at 03:00 PM by Ally
Updated 07-16-2012 at 04:01 PM by Ally
Some people may call me shallow. Maybe fickle. I say I'm smart. I'm smart to get out before I waste any more time.

Eli is not the guy for me. Here are some of the reasons why

1. Upon closer inspection, he had really poor dental hygiene. He always seems to have this buildup of stuff around his gums. As he is leaning in to kiss me, all I see is this stuff and I feel like screaming! Plus the night of our drive-in date, I really did not enjoy the buttery oily kisses. He could have wiped his mouth before coming in to kiss me. Ew!! Now, you have to understand. My ex had REALLY bad breath all the time. And he was a bad kisser. So this time around, I really can't settle for someone who doesn't have the necessary skills there. I'm not asking for much. Just a clean mouth, some soft lips, and a bit of tongue.

2. He talks about his ex WAYYYY too much as I have talked about before. It's not getting any better. I had a conversation with him about it and he reassured me that it wasn't because he was still hung up on her. But then he proceeds to talk about Sarah this and Sarah that...UGH.

3. Apart from the bad mouth hygiene, I AM physically attracted to him....and he's physically attracted to me...but I think that's where it ends. We aren't really connecting on a mental level at all. The conversation on our first couples dates was AWESOME. But since then we are struggling to find things to talk about and to find some common ground.

4. I'm just not feeling it! The chemistry just isn't there like I thought it would be. I don't really miss him when I'm not with him, I am just barely excited to see him now, and I'm just kinda blah about it.

Soooooooooooooo.....back to the dating blogs. I'm not going to jump back into it right away. I still have to have a conversation with Eli to let him know what's up. That might take a few days...maybe a week. I need to grow a pair before that happens.

Oh and there's another guy I need to deal with as well. There's someone in the background who pops up every now and again still. I need to deal with that as well. SIGH.

Oh...an added note...today I find out Eli owns a FLESHLIGHT. I posted about it. It's a creepy thing. I saw he sent me a pic on my phone and I was like "Oh nice...he sent me a nice pic". Then I open it. His junk was stuck in this contraption and I was like...WTF?!?!?
Total Comments 12

Comments

Old
LucasR's Avatar
In the meantime I can satisfy any of your animalistic sexual want and desires if you want. I'll even give you can fare. Jut no dinner
Posted 07-16-2012 at 03:08 PM by LucasR LucasR is offline
Old
Ally's Avatar
I'm all for it, Lucas. But one question - do you by any chance own a fleshlight? This is now on my list of dealbreakers...
Posted 07-16-2012 at 03:59 PM by Ally Ally is offline
Old
Flesh light??? Good Lord! I know I am one of the most naive gals around here...having to look up dozens of things on Urban Dictionary or Google...but Good Lord!!! I wasn't prepared for the image that came up when I googled "Flesh Light!" I think I am permanently scarred! And your picture was his "package" attached to that thing!!....I'm feeling a bit queezy....sort of like the night I danced with "You want some of this? Guy" and he breathed his puke breath on me...

Sorry, Ally, but you are SOOOOOOOOO way beyond him. And I agree about the kissing aspect and good dental hygiene. A definite must in my book too! You are not demanding too much and you are not being fickle by any means.....any woman as awesome and beautiful as you deserves only the best!!

Take a step back....take a deep breath....and then get back into the ring again....I'm sure your prince is yet to come...
Posted 07-16-2012 at 04:18 PM by cougargirl cougargirl is offline
Old
DomesticDiva's Avatar
Ok Lucas Av is PERFECT for the FleshLight revelation..........

I don't blame ya, for the record....And better to get out now...Onto bigger & better
Posted 07-16-2012 at 05:27 PM by DomesticDiva DomesticDiva is offline
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Ally's Avatar
Yes...Lucas' av is a PERFECT image of what I looked like when I saw Eli's junk stuck in this thing....well except I'm a very white chick and much more attractive I hope...lol
Posted 07-16-2012 at 05:52 PM by Ally Ally is offline
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bryan3636's Avatar
Hmmmm, have you totally ruled out women???? lol
Posted 07-16-2012 at 05:59 PM by bryan3636 bryan3636 is offline
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Shawn's Avatar
Just curious ...thought Canada had some sort of medical plan for these types of sexual related things....here I was about to move just for health care.
Posted 07-16-2012 at 06:12 PM by Shawn Shawn is offline
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southernboy's Avatar
On my shopping list for if/when I become single again... Orbitz and a Fleshlight. Winning.
Posted 07-16-2012 at 07:43 PM by southernboy southernboy is offline
Old
A Fleshlight?? Really?? and he took a pic and sent it to you. there is a reason that it's sent in discrete packaging, cause NOONE wants it to be public. If that is your gig, but all means, rock out with your cock out.. But, do NOT, advertise that..
Posted 07-16-2012 at 10:14 PM by D4k D4k is offline
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wayneypoo's Avatar
why do you bother putting yourself through this ,you know im the guy"the only question is are you the women?
Posted 07-17-2012 at 05:23 AM by wayneypoo wayneypoo is offline
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HOTlantaM's Avatar
hmmm...why haven't you been posting any dating updates?
Posted 08-02-2012 at 08:00 AM by HOTlantaM HOTlantaM is offline
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caniplay4aday's Avatar
Ima not sure where your saga is now but I wish you all the best in this rediscovery of who just might be the one who has that kisss that you long for.
For the record I do not own a flesh light and although I think sexual toys are fun in a relationship I feel strongly that they are to be used together.
Good luck,
~Ray
Posted 08-06-2012 at 06:17 AM by caniplay4aday caniplay4aday is offline
 
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