Just a small incite into how it was for me as a stay at home mum.
By the time I was 27 I had three children under 5. I was lucky not to have to work during this time, although in hindsight it may have been better if I did.
When the youngest was 3mths money was running low and we needed an extra income. Because of my lack of skills, not having a steady career and the fact that we would need to spend money on babysitting, it was decided the best option was for hubby to get a second job. The one he had was an early start and finished early afternoon.
So the second job needed to be an evening one. He became a filler, stacking shelves at Coles. It was another physical job. He usually only had time to have a sleep, feed and change before going to his evening job. Sometimes he didn't even get to come home between jobs. Just went straight from one to the other and I would not see him for nearly 24hrs. This went on for 11 years.
All I had was 3 kids and four walls to keep me occupied. I couldn't drive and even if I could we couldn't afford two cars and impracticle for me to use it and run him to his jobs. At this point my sister and close friends had all moved away and my mother had died when I was 19. So I felt very alone. As for hubby his main job was one of a social nature, talked to people all day and then with the night job it became even more of a social nature. The employees would organise, lunches, dinners, see shows, have drinks. I was lucky enough to attend less than half a dozen of these as the rest I was told were 'no spouses allowed'. Years later I found out this was not the case.
I raised our children on my own feeling very alone, deserted, unattractive, unintelligent and worthless. I had the kids and four walls, he had friends, outings etc.
By the time I was 27 I had three children under 5. I was lucky not to have to work during this time, although in hindsight it may have been better if I did.
When the youngest was 3mths money was running low and we needed an extra income. Because of my lack of skills, not having a steady career and the fact that we would need to spend money on babysitting, it was decided the best option was for hubby to get a second job. The one he had was an early start and finished early afternoon.
So the second job needed to be an evening one. He became a filler, stacking shelves at Coles. It was another physical job. He usually only had time to have a sleep, feed and change before going to his evening job. Sometimes he didn't even get to come home between jobs. Just went straight from one to the other and I would not see him for nearly 24hrs. This went on for 11 years.
All I had was 3 kids and four walls to keep me occupied. I couldn't drive and even if I could we couldn't afford two cars and impracticle for me to use it and run him to his jobs. At this point my sister and close friends had all moved away and my mother had died when I was 19. So I felt very alone. As for hubby his main job was one of a social nature, talked to people all day and then with the night job it became even more of a social nature. The employees would organise, lunches, dinners, see shows, have drinks. I was lucky enough to attend less than half a dozen of these as the rest I was told were 'no spouses allowed'. Years later I found out this was not the case.
I raised our children on my own feeling very alone, deserted, unattractive, unintelligent and worthless. I had the kids and four walls, he had friends, outings etc.
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