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For those of you who do not know me I have been married 21 yrs. A long time. In this amount of time I have found that I have come accustomed to feelings of guilt.

My husband is not the most secure person. I was naive and young when we married and was not the strong person I am today. I let him dictate to me. I allowed him to belittle me and tell me how stupid my interests were. Friends were never good enough, etc...

It is strange how you begin to second guess your every move and allow this garbage you have been fed to eat it's way into your brain like a worm in an apple.

U know the things you enjoy and the goals you have are normal but yet you ask yourself, "am I being unfair?"

I suppose it is like a disease. I can't believe I allowed it and to this day allow it, to a degree. I hate confrontation and hate the way it affects a family.

Family, I look at my son and pray he never treats women that way. I will personally kick his ass! And my daughters, they better not allow this to happen to them. I see my oldest with boyfriends and I don't think she will.

It is easy to say I am weak and I should leave. Maybe I am. I guess that is for me to determine and to work out myself and I have a feeling I will in due time.

What really intrigues me is how a person can be so oblivious to what they are doing. My husband thinks he loves tremendously and sees no faults.

Maybe someone will read this and know they are not alone, or maybe they will read it and think, that I am crazy!
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Posted 03-29-2017 at 01:33 PM by gdgrl
Good morning peeps. Ready for a new blog? Seems a new friend of mine is, he says I'm overdue. You may disagree.

Now, what to write about. I've considered sharing a personal experience chock full of love, sex and heartache, not exactly in that order......YAWN. Boring right? I'll save you the sordid details and write about something else that is dear to me.

I awoke this morning knowing I had many depending on me, waiting for me to have my first cup of java and to get my ass in gear. I walked outside to their grunts and stares. Some looking at me as if to say, "it's about damn time."

My cows were hungry you see, they depend on us humans to make sure their needs are met. I don't take that responsibility lightly either. The return is triple fold. For they not only provide for us as well, but we learn from them. There's responsibility, compassion and the complexities of nature.

So the machine was turned on, I put feed into each stall where they will milk, 2 at a time and I went to get my first cow, June. June was born in, guess what month.......that's right, June. We are a clever family, so unique in our naming abilities. Her mother, rest her soul, was Janice. (moment of silence)

Anyway, I have to go get June, she's alone in a pen we made for her. She's been in a lot of pain and had a horrible popping in her hip when she walked. We've had her xrayed and they can't seem to pinpoint the issue. We try to keep her in a small area so as not to hurt herself further.

I opened the gate to her pen and she took her sweet time walking to the milk barn, stopping to nibble some oats and dip her head in the feed barrel along the way. She takes after her momma, in no hurry, very leisurely.

I let in another cow, Flicka and prime them before I put on the machines. They are quite content eating their feed as they wait. June is quite the milker, lovely udder and she gives quite a bit of milk, so much, I have to shut down and empty some out of the holding tank we have. At that time I feel some buckets and my daughter goes to feed the three calves that have their own individual hutch. Oh what a life!!

I continue the process of letting them in, 2 x 2, until I am done. I have 6 to milk total. There's Jean, Janet, Little Girl and Jolene. Do we appear to be partial to J?

As they are milking, I feed the others in the corral, throwing them oats and alfalfa in the manger. I forgot to mention the one who was waiting for me with the most anticipation this morning, Vindicator. He's our bull. He likes me, but he's not so partial to others. It's a respect thing and a "do unto others," thing. I give him a good scratch on the head and some feed and he doesn't try to run me over. Win/win!

Milking is done, what happens to all this milk you ask? I know you're on pins and needles, such a suspenseful tail. Get it, tail....a bit of cow humor. Sooo, the milk is emptied from the holding tank into 5 gallon buckets and dumped into a 50gal barrel. The barrel has had holes drilled all the way around it and nipples with tubes are placed in the holes. We wheel it out to the pasture and the older calves suck on the nipples. Ingenious!

Believe it or not, this is not how we make a living, it's more like a hobby. Our cows are well treated and are more like pets. Some go to fair for showing and we have saved many of their lives. In a more commercial setting, that wouldn't be the case.

This part is not for the squeamish, but it's just an example of the lengths we have gone to to care for these lovely creatures.

We have had a cow get blue bag and that's basically an infection that takes over a quarter in the udder, the udder is broken down into quarters. Under most conditions the cow dies, but we doctored her, that quarter ended up sloughing off and she now only has 3 teats. We don't milk her, a couple of calves feed off of her.

Very recently, one of our smaller girls had an issue delivering. Unbeknownst to us, she'd been in labor for several hours and the calf was big, got stuck and it died. Sadly, the vet had to decapitate the calf to save the cow. We were all saddened by the event, but were thankful to have saved the momma.

Janice, which I spoke of earlier, stopped eating and the vet couldn't figure out what was wrong with her. We went everywhere trying to get her hay that we thought she might eat, even traveling couple hours away for fodder, sadly we'd exhausted everything and had to have her put down. That broke all of our hearts and she is buried on our ranch. I know this isn't ethical to have a cow burial plot and she's the only one we did that for. She was very special.

Well, I hope you liked this latest blog from the city girl turned cow lover. I've kept my end of the deal.
Total Comments 15


bryan3636's Avatar
Posted 03-29-2017 at 03:55 PM by bryan3636 bryan3636 is offline
bryan3636's Avatar
This story goes a long way to show how cowrageous you are when it comes to your second family. I highly cowmend you for your efforts. I know you'd never steer us wrong on this and that you'd milk every moment of the story, a very mooving tribute.
Posted 03-29-2017 at 03:55 PM by bryan3636 bryan3636 is offline
gdgrl's Avatar
And this is why I love you so moooch!!! Thank you for recownizing my efforts. <3
Posted 03-29-2017 at 06:02 PM by gdgrl gdgrl is offline
Pinewood's Avatar
So to summarize.............some of my key take outs...

You milk cows titties to give the milk BACK to cows via fake titties...
Cows suffer from the same blue bag conditions we men do when not milked proper-like..

and my FAV....
You actually know what a "lovely udder" must look like! !!

Nice blog addition!
Posted 03-30-2017 at 04:41 AM by Pinewood Pinewood is offline
SunnyD's Avatar
I love when you talk about your cows! You talk about them much like I do my fur babies now that the "other" kids have grown up
Posted 03-30-2017 at 12:45 PM by SunnyD SunnyD is offline
gdgrl's Avatar
First Mr. Pine or is it Mr. Wood? I certainly do know what a good udder looks like, the feel and firmness of it. I could teach you. And I'm afraid your affliction with blue bag, is quite unlike theirs.

Thank you Sunny. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Posted 03-30-2017 at 01:09 PM by gdgrl gdgrl is offline
hijiller's Avatar
Omg, I really enjoyed this, but want to jump off bridge for being such a lazybones.

I talk a good story about nature, but no way I could do what you do.

Great blog!
Posted 03-30-2017 at 04:20 PM by hijiller hijiller is offline
gdgrl's Avatar
Thank you Jill.
Posted 03-30-2017 at 07:22 PM by gdgrl gdgrl is offline
SophieC's Avatar
Great blog. I'm very sorry about Janet.
Posted 03-31-2017 at 03:36 PM by SophieC SophieC is offline
gdgrl's Avatar
Thank you Sophie. I wish I could share a pic of my new girl. She's a cutie. I call her Cara, short for Cara Branca, meaning white face in Portuguese.
Posted 03-31-2017 at 03:43 PM by gdgrl gdgrl is offline
*Brad*'s Avatar
Milk maid milk maid
in the barn
Is it just your raven hair?
Or your cow dung every where
That makes a man just simply yearn
For udder joy to contemplate
A friend who is so really great
Posted 04-01-2017 at 11:11 AM by *Brad* *Brad* is offline
Just A Girl's Avatar
So adorable. You make me wanna have a cow, man
Posted 04-07-2017 at 10:34 AM by Just A Girl Just A Girl is offline
gdgrl's Avatar
It sounds silly, but in a lot of ways, they are like many of our fav pets. They read our moods. When I was upset, I'd go out to the pasture and my Kathy would nudge me and it was like she knew I was down.

Not that she can be replaced, but my lil Kara (with a K in memory of Kathy) is the sweetest, she loves to be petted on and when I call her name, she becomes very alert and runs out of her pen for attention.

I'm a nut, what can I say....
Posted 04-07-2017 at 01:36 PM by gdgrl gdgrl is offline
Iceburn's Avatar
I always thought Cows were hardy creatures, the kind that could withstand Tsunami's and Nuclear war, ya know?

Didn't realize so many things affect them so thanks for this illuminating insight into our Bovine friends..and for curing a little of my ignorance

Great read Gd
Posted 12-11-2017 at 02:34 AM by Iceburn Iceburn is offline
jboogie's Avatar
I never thought that I would be moved by your posting I just want to say thank you for opening my eyes
Posted 01-10-2018 at 12:37 AM by jboogie jboogie is offline
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