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Today is April 1. 29 years ago today my daughter Rachel was born, and 16 months later she was gone from this earth. Today is always a day I spend reflecting on my life, like New Year's Eve I suppose. I think of all that was, is, will never be and might be. I think of the good in my life...my daughter that is alive now, and is going to be 24 soon. How somehow in my crazy, mixed-up life I raised her to be a sweet, confident and amazing woman, and how blessed I am to have her as my daughter and friend.
My work...how when I work it takes my mind off of all the doubts, the fears, and the friends I have made who help me through.
Now I can add this site to the list...to those of you have become friends, thank you for your posts, your emails, IM's and for making me laugh...often out loud. Thank you for being insightful, and for allowing me to explore this new world. Thank you for your advice and your patience. For those of you I don't know, but who have given me a rep or a thank you for a post, thank you also...those are appreciated more than you know.
I don't know yet if this is where I fit in...I think my emotions may be too much for this...but while I am here I just wanted to let you all know that this helps alleviate the pain and the loneliness in my life.
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Weaving the Tapestry

Posted 10-22-2014 at 12:31 PM by mschevious1
Updated 10-22-2014 at 12:34 PM by mschevious1
Lately I have seen myself becoming someone that I don’t like again. My entire adult life I have tried to live a good life and treat everyone the way that I would like to be treated, and at times I have failed miserably. This online life for me is sometimes hard to navigate and quite confusing, as there are genuine people who treat others the same as they do in real life, and there are others who hide behind the screens and perhaps have forgotten that there are real people who live, love, hurt...
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Perfectly Imperfect
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thoughts on life

Posted 09-05-2014 at 09:45 AM by mschevious1
I have never truly felt anger toward anyone that has hurt me my entire life. There are so many times I wish that just once I could. I feel it toward people who hurt others weaker than themselves….wife, child, animal abusers…I will walk up to someone twice my size with no fear and tell them that they are a poor excuse for a man and that what they are doing does not make them strong, it only shows what a weak and pathetic excuse for a human being that they are. Foolish? Hell, yes….but I have...
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(“This Is Gonna Be) The Best Day of My Life”

Posted 05-09-2014 at 04:53 PM by mschevious1
Updated 05-09-2014 at 09:53 PM by mschevious1
I LOVE that song! (By American Authors). In case you have been living under a rock, here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyd_qWt_jJU It has become my theme song and my mantra.

Almost 18 months ago, I woke up one day and decided that I was tired of living in limbo. I had become numb, almost like one of the walking dead. I went through the motions of life, but I wasn’t really living. A little background…. two reasons….my marriage…I married my best friend, and to this...
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Friends and Other Strangers

Posted 04-17-2014 at 08:07 AM by mschevious1
First of all, I still love a lot of things about this site. I’ve met some good friends, had some fun times and it has allowed me to express thoughts and feelings that I don’t have another outlet for, and for that I’m grateful. Last night I was on, got a little bored and started taking a good, hard look at my “friends” list. The whole concept always makes me laugh, because it reminds me of junior high school and popularity, which I didn’t understand then and I still don’t to this day.
...
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2013, my first year in review

Posted 01-01-2014 at 11:39 AM by mschevious1
Updated 01-01-2014 at 07:17 PM by mschevious1
2013 was a year of discovery, joy, laughter and pain for me. I came to the site a wide-eyed, naïve newbie, full of hope. I’ve gone through many stages since then—I’ve been to the top of Mt. Everest and plunged for brief moments into the depths of hell.



When I first came onto the site, as we all have experienced, I felt completely alone. I remember looking around and thinking that I would never fit in. People seemed to care about one another and be a part of a fun...
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