Married And Flirting Chat

Go Back   Married And Flirting Chat > Married And Flirting Chat Forums > Jokes, Stories & Games

Jokes, Stories & Games Have a good joke to tell or a story to share. How about a game to play, Post it here and share it with us.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 07-06-2017, 02:33 AM   #1151
shhh_she_might_hear_me
Flirting God
 
shhh_she_might_hear_me's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Age: 42
Posts: 1,647
Thanks: 303
Thanked 361 Times in 320 Posts
shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like shhh_she_might_hear_me Is God Like
Default

Um...smoke.
__________________
Yoga Pants Gives Me Yogurt Pants
shhh_she_might_hear_me is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to shhh_she_might_hear_me For This Useful Post:
GlassyLady (07-06-2017)
Old 07-06-2017, 10:08 AM   #1152
DomesticDiva
~*Concentrated Awesome*~
 
DomesticDiva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: "In That WalMart Parkin' Lot"
Age: 42
Posts: 65,637
Thanks: 28,785
Thanked 17,025 Times in 11,320 Posts
Blog Entries: 30
DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like
Default

constantly complain
__________________

~If you smash into something good, you should hold on until it's time to let go.~
DomesticDiva is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to DomesticDiva For This Useful Post:
southern1 (07-14-2017)
Old 07-06-2017, 10:27 AM   #1153
Cotties.
CharminNdashin
 
Cotties.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Thumb
Age: 44
Posts: 36,899
Thanks: 1,413
Thanked 5,685 Times in 4,377 Posts
Blog Entries: 4
Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like
Default

stick to the truth
Cotties. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2017, 12:14 PM   #1154
SpecialK
Hah Bumhug
 
SpecialK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Currently Panhandling
Age: 51
Posts: 18,171
Thanks: 7,646
Thanked 6,537 Times in 5,095 Posts
Blog Entries: 5
SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like
Default

Never trim your toenails
__________________
Life is a lot like a penis - soft, relaxed and hanging free... then a woman makes it hard.
SpecialK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-14-2017, 08:39 PM   #1155
dixiechik
Can you see me now?
 
dixiechik's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Where peaches grow and the confederate flag flows
Age: 47
Posts: 23,284
Thanks: 6,871
Thanked 8,625 Times in 5,533 Posts
dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like dixiechik Is God Like
Default

Call them out on their bullshit not they tuck and run then.
__________________

If I offend you cry me a river, I'll bring snacks and a raft. I will literally float down your tears while munching on chips and working on my tan.
dixiechik is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to dixiechik For This Useful Post:
66rockman (07-24-2017), JerseyGirl (07-14-2017), Just A Girl (07-24-2017)
Old 07-14-2017, 08:51 PM   #1156
southern1
Let's Ride!
 
southern1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Heart of Dixie
Age: 53
Posts: 20,784
Thanks: 10,001
Thanked 8,398 Times in 6,245 Posts
southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like
Default

Whiners
southern1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-14-2017, 09:13 PM   #1157
RisingSun
4.5% GDP Forecasted
 
RisingSun's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: My alternate Reality
Age: 65
Posts: 18,100
Thanks: 4,898
Thanked 2,755 Times in 2,547 Posts
RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like RisingSun Is God Like
Default

Stay the course
__________________


Common sense is " Genius" dressed in it's working clothes
RisingSun is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-14-2017, 09:15 PM   #1158
southern1
Let's Ride!
 
southern1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Heart of Dixie
Age: 53
Posts: 20,784
Thanks: 10,001
Thanked 8,398 Times in 6,245 Posts
southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like southern1 Is God Like
Default

P
O
S
T
L
I
K
E
T
H
I
S
southern1 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to southern1 For This Useful Post:
Just A Girl (07-24-2017)
Old 07-16-2017, 07:44 PM   #1159
Aradia
Court Jester
 
Aradia's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Age: 36
Posts: 6,272
Thanks: 2,945
Thanked 2,673 Times in 2,042 Posts
Blog Entries: 15
Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like Aradia Is God Like
Default

Sing in the supermarket. Dance in the supermarket. Wave at people you don't know and enjoy that they will be trying to figure out who you are for awhile.
Aradia is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Aradia For This Useful Post:
scoobertina (07-21-2017)
Old 07-17-2017, 06:18 AM   #1160
Lubbs
Married And Flirting
 
Lubbs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2017
Age: 32
Posts: 44
Thanks: 0
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute Lubbs has a reputation beyond repute
Default

Throwing cigarette butt wherever you please (that annoys me)
Lubbs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-17-2017, 06:49 AM   #1161
Cotties.
CharminNdashin
 
Cotties.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Thumb
Age: 44
Posts: 36,899
Thanks: 1,413
Thanked 5,685 Times in 4,377 Posts
Blog Entries: 4
Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like
Default

chew before I swallow
Cotties. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-17-2017, 09:09 AM   #1162
DomesticDiva
~*Concentrated Awesome*~
 
DomesticDiva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: "In That WalMart Parkin' Lot"
Age: 42
Posts: 65,637
Thanks: 28,785
Thanked 17,025 Times in 11,320 Posts
Blog Entries: 30
DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like DomesticDiva Is God Like
Default

ignore their existence...online even without ignoring them at all. It's a craft
__________________

~If you smash into something good, you should hold on until it's time to let go.~
DomesticDiva is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to DomesticDiva For This Useful Post:
Just A Girl (07-24-2017)
Old 07-17-2017, 11:06 AM   #1163
SpecialK
Hah Bumhug
 
SpecialK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Currently Panhandling
Age: 51
Posts: 18,171
Thanks: 7,646
Thanked 6,537 Times in 5,095 Posts
Blog Entries: 5
SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like SpecialK Is God Like
Default

for some people, it's as easy as me still breathing..
__________________
Life is a lot like a penis - soft, relaxed and hanging free... then a woman makes it hard.
SpecialK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2017, 02:44 PM   #1164
JerseyGirl
(。♥‿♥。)
 
JerseyGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Age: 51
Posts: 44,284
Thanks: 16,829
Thanked 17,803 Times in 13,858 Posts
JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like JerseyGirl Is God Like
Default

I found out just be yourself smile and ignore works well .
JerseyGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to JerseyGirl For This Useful Post:
leggy (07-21-2017), Lyric~* (07-21-2017)
Old 07-21-2017, 04:05 PM   #1165
Lyric~*
*~🦋~*
 
Lyric~*'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Bouncing between logic & magic
Age: 39
Posts: 15,441
Thanks: 9,312
Thanked 7,277 Times in 5,372 Posts
Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like Lyric~* Is God Like
Default

Form and voice your own opinion.
Lyric~* is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Lyric~* For This Useful Post:
66rockman (07-24-2017), JerseyGirl (07-21-2017), Just A Girl (07-24-2017), leggy (07-21-2017)
Old 07-21-2017, 04:09 PM   #1166
leggy
..
 
leggy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: stage left
Age: 55
Posts: 14,160
Thanks: 3,981
Thanked 3,349 Times in 2,632 Posts
Blog Entries: 1
leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like
Default

Ask a man why is it ok for you and not me???:mu That'll get them revved!!!
__________________
leggy is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to leggy For This Useful Post:
JerseyGirl (07-21-2017)
Old 07-24-2017, 09:32 AM   #1167
Cotties.
CharminNdashin
 
Cotties.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Thumb
Age: 44
Posts: 36,899
Thanks: 1,413
Thanked 5,685 Times in 4,377 Posts
Blog Entries: 4
Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by leggy View Post
Ask a man why is it ok for you and not me???:mu That'll get them revved!!!
are you kidding me.

The answer is because I said so.
Cotties. is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Cotties. For This Useful Post:
leggy (07-24-2017)
Old 07-24-2017, 09:47 AM   #1168
madmax
Donator
 
madmax's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: UK
Age: 57
Posts: 19,779
Thanks: 7,077
Thanked 5,987 Times in 4,661 Posts
madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like madmax Is God Like
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aradia View Post
Sing in the supermarket. Dance in the supermarket. Wave at people you don't know and enjoy that they will be trying to figure out who you are for awhile.
If I sang in the supermarket people would have every right to be annoyed
__________________
madmax is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2017, 10:07 AM   #1169
hijiller
Hmmmm...
 
hijiller's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: In a New York state of mind
Age: 43
Posts: 27,450
Thanks: 10,371
Thanked 11,892 Times in 8,126 Posts
Blog Entries: 3
hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like hijiller Is God Like
Default

Pick lint off their sweater while they are telling a boring story.
hijiller is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2017, 10:54 AM   #1170
66rockman
Tigertalker
 
66rockman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Way down south in the land of cotton ...
Age: 50
Posts: 3,714
Thanks: 5,083
Thanked 886 Times in 766 Posts
66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like 66rockman Is God Like
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by DomesticDiva View Post
constantly complain

So very true!
__________________
MAKE AMERICA
GREAT AGAIN!


66rockman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2017, 10:58 AM   #1171
Just A Girl
The Notorious J.A.G.
 
Just A Girl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Age: 44
Posts: 59,149
Thanks: 30,658
Thanked 34,036 Times in 21,055 Posts
Blog Entries: 21
Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like
Default

Respond to everything they say with "that's what she said".
Just A Girl is online now   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Just A Girl For This Useful Post:
hijiller (07-24-2017), ImNotYourWife (07-24-2017), leggy (07-24-2017)
Old 07-24-2017, 11:12 AM   #1172
Cotties.
CharminNdashin
 
Cotties.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Thumb
Age: 44
Posts: 36,899
Thanks: 1,413
Thanked 5,685 Times in 4,377 Posts
Blog Entries: 4
Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hijiller View Post
Pick lint off their sweater while they are telling a boring story.
that was so funny when you let me scold you for underestimating mans double standards....

I rock
Cotties. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2017, 11:14 AM   #1173
Cotties.
CharminNdashin
 
Cotties.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Thumb
Age: 44
Posts: 36,899
Thanks: 1,413
Thanked 5,685 Times in 4,377 Posts
Blog Entries: 4
Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like Cotties. Is God Like
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Just A Girl View Post
Respond to everything they say with "that's what she said".
why do chicks press thanks to shit I would just ignore
Cotties. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2017, 11:44 AM   #1174
Just A Girl
The Notorious J.A.G.
 
Just A Girl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Age: 44
Posts: 59,149
Thanks: 30,658
Thanked 34,036 Times in 21,055 Posts
Blog Entries: 21
Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like Just A Girl Is God Like
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cotties View Post
why do chicks press thanks to shit I would just ignore
Cuz you're missing a chromosome.
Just A Girl is online now   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Just A Girl For This Useful Post:
66rockman (07-24-2017)
Old 07-24-2017, 12:27 PM   #1175
leggy
..
 
leggy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: stage left
Age: 55
Posts: 14,160
Thanks: 3,981
Thanked 3,349 Times in 2,632 Posts
Blog Entries: 1
leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like leggy Is God Like
Default

walk past me like you don't see them, same as ignoring
__________________
leggy is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:58 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.