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Old 07-30-2008, 05:24 PM   #1
tallguy32
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Default Rules for having an affair

Do you have any? New to this so I don't. Here are some no brainers. What are yours?

Never within 50 miles of home
Always pay cash
Leave no record on your cell phone
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Old 07-30-2008, 07:39 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tallguy32 View Post
Do you have any? New to this so I don't. Here are some no brainers. What are yours?

Never within 50 miles of home
Always pay cash
Leave no record on your cell phone
The number 1 rule is don't assume you won't get caught.
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Old 07-30-2008, 07:43 PM   #3
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he has to be clean...
he has to have all his own teeth... or be able to purchase them...
he has to have a decent job...

oh wait... I am listing the things I am looking for in my new man...
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Old 07-30-2008, 07:47 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by scoobertina View Post
he has to be clean...
he has to have all his own teeth... or be able to purchase them...
he has to have a decent job...

oh wait... I am listing the things I am looking for in my new man...

OMG Scoob..........
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Old 07-30-2008, 08:07 PM   #5
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  • He has to havea space ship.
  • He has to have a wookie for a friend.
  • He has to like Princesses
  • He has to look good in black pants.
  • He has to be a scoundrel.
  • He has to have a highly functioning, powerful, good shooting blaster pistol.
  • He has to be good at the Word Game Thread.
  • He has to be sarcastic.
  • He can't cry when I yell at him.
  • He has to have a lot of endurence.
  • He has to be Han Solo
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Old 07-30-2008, 08:34 PM   #6
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Actually, the number 1 rule is ALWAYS wear a condom!!
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Old 07-30-2008, 08:41 PM   #7
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Having an affair is sort of about breaking rules so having rules for an affair just seems wrong. Of course, maybe that's why I'm not in the middle of an affair.
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Old 07-30-2008, 10:50 PM   #8
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1. Keep eyes open for the van from "cheaters"
2. NO affectionate touching out in public... you never know when someone will take a picture.


And that is about all I can think of.
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Old 07-30-2008, 10:54 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by torin30 View Post
1. Keep eyes open for the van from "cheaters"
2. NO affectionate touching out in public... you never know when someone will take a picture.


And that is about all I can think of.

LOL.....thanks, wench.
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Old 07-30-2008, 10:57 PM   #10
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Never wear the gorilla suit on the train home.
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Old 07-30-2008, 10:58 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sneaky View Post
  • He has to havea space ship.
  • He has to have a wookie for a friend.
  • He has to like Princesses
  • He has to look good in black pants.
  • He has to be a scoundrel.
  • He has to have a highly functioning, powerful, good shooting blaster pistol.
  • He has to be good at the Word Game Thread.
  • He has to be sarcastic.
  • He can't cry when I yell at him.
  • He has to have a lot of endurence.
  • He has to be Han Solo
I always knew you were tough to please, but this is ridiculous.....there is no mere mortal that can POSSIBLY live up to this description......this is a description of possibly the most erotically imaginative super stud the universe has ever known.....good luck with THAT search
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Old 07-31-2008, 11:27 AM   #12
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Always label your extra partners with something easy to remember... like.. oh i dunno lets say letters ( Guy A, B, C, and so on) ... that way you will never slip up and call out a wrong name or something
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Old 07-31-2008, 11:30 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawn_N_Sandiego View Post
Always label your extra partners with something easy to remember... like.. oh i dunno lets say letters ( Guy A, B, C, and so on) ... that way you will never slip up and call out a wrong name or something
OMG Shawn.............I haven't even had my coffee YET and this was funny!!!!
Just imagine it.........
"Oh baby..you know how I like it..Ohhhh...Ohhhh Q!!!!!!)
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Old 07-31-2008, 02:37 PM   #14
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She has to be super-intelligent
She has to be blond and beautiful
She has to be tall and athletic
She has to have been a model
She has to be unattainable
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Old 07-31-2008, 02:50 PM   #15
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1)Make sure your phone bill is not itemized with phone calls
2) Delete all text messages
3) no pictures
4) use a pet name i.e. honey, hon, thus avoiding saying the wrong name, even in your sleep.
5) always have a plausible excuse ready in case someone sees you in public
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Old 07-31-2008, 03:20 PM   #16
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request your lover wear no cologne/perfume.
that way your spouse won't smell it and raise a bunch of questions.

Never pay for hotel rooms with your credit card.
Try eplaining THAT one to your spouse when the bill comes in.
Oh, and NEVER keep reciepts from your affair in your wallet, or pocket.


For the guys: ask your lover NOT to wear makeup,
the pretty shade of pink might look good on her lips, but
not so good on your shirt, and even worse if it isnt your wife's shade.

Oh, and NEVER, EVER, EVER..bring your lover to your house.
Thats how I caught my hubby cheating on me...
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Old 07-31-2008, 03:22 PM   #17
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I think you also must add that your partner should be married also...this way there are no expectations.
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Old 07-31-2008, 03:40 PM   #18
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tin heart Is he still your husband?
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Old 07-31-2008, 04:00 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawn_N_Sandiego View Post
Always label your extra partners with something easy to remember... like.. oh i dunno lets say letters ( Guy A, B, C, and so on) ... that way you will never slip up and call out a wrong name or something

I once asked my wife where her sticky was. When she gave me a questioning look I tapped her forehead and said you know the one that goes right here so I don't say the wrong name.
She was less than impressed. I thought it was halarious.
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Old 07-31-2008, 04:02 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by helloscooter View Post
I think you also must add that your partner should be married also...this way there are no expectations.


Good point. However even married people develop expectations.
Maybe amend that one to say be with someone who has more to loose than you
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Old 07-31-2008, 04:05 PM   #21
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Good point....it's best if her husband makes lots of $ but doesn't give her love she needs.....this way she doesn't want to leave him....but wants to keep coming back to you
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Old 07-31-2008, 04:18 PM   #22
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Got to think way way ahead on some things
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Old 07-31-2008, 06:53 PM   #23
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the number one rule is you WILL get caught. maybe you can keep it going but it will happen. no one can be that enamored with someone and not make a mistake. sooner or later you get sloppy and underestimate your spouse or make it so obvious that it cant but help but be noticed( which in some cases is probably what someone wants. )
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Old 07-31-2008, 08:17 PM   #24
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Always pay cash (and if you need a large amount of it, withdraw it over several days).
NO PICS OR VIDS (that's how I eventually got caught ).

No pefume/colonge...we all like to, but it lingers.

Should likewise be married.

Don't call out his/her name in bed...use a pet name, or something you use now (oh, fuck yeah, baby, etc) . I almost called out the wrong name with my wife once--ouch!!

Go through all your pockets before going back home.

Always check for hairs! Those damn things stick everywhere!
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Old 07-31-2008, 08:22 PM   #25
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kinky sex...
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