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Everyday Life For Married Couples A forum for couples to chat about your everyday married life. This would be a good place for women and men to get to know eachother.

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Old 08-16-2007, 02:33 PM   #1
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Default I think I lost my man card.

I just posted in love and advice yesterday about why women dont press for sex like we do. LOL!!! I found out today I guess I turned her down twice in the last week. ??? Did'nt even know it. LOL I think I lost my man card. Do all you beautiful women on this site apparently ask for it in some way that you understand, but as for us men, It goes completly over our heads? It's the suttle hints we dont grasp. If you dont come up and grab our cocks out of our pants, cahnces are we wont figure it out!!!!
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Old 08-16-2007, 02:49 PM   #2
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You know Slick, I have been accused of "reading too much into things" because I always look for the subtleties. It wasn't until not long ago that I realized when my husband says he doesn't like pea soup, it doesn't mean that he hates my cooking! This made me understand the concept that when a man says "Women never flirt with me." they are usually very wrong!

Men take everything at face value, and women like to beat around the bush... no pun intended.
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Old 08-16-2007, 03:16 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by slick69
It's the suttle hints we dont grasp. If you dont come up and grab our cocks out of our pants, cahnces are we wont figure it out!!!!
Yep, most women use subtle hints.

Women are like your VCR, just about the time you think you've got her programmed, the electricity goes off and you have to start all over. The only problem is women don't come with a instruction book, but we should lol.

SOME Men however are like picture books, there are no hidden messages, they are straight forward when it comes to sex.

Last edited by Shiane; 08-16-2007 at 04:19 PM.
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Old 08-16-2007, 03:41 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by slick69
I just posted in love and advice yesterday about why women dont press for sex like we do. LOL!!! I found out today I guess I turned her down twice in the last week. ??? Did'nt even know it. LOL I think I lost my man card. Do all you beautiful women on this site apparently ask for it in some way that you understand, but as for us men, It goes completly over our heads? It's the suttle hints we dont grasp. If you dont come up and grab our cocks out of our pants, cahnces are we wont figure it out!!!!
Ya know, this is stupid but anyway...years ago I for some unknown reason, thought that lightly scratching the palm of my husbands hand when he was holding mine was some sort of universal signal that the woman wanted sex.

I used to be so disappointed when I would do this to him in church, at the movies, in the car and then he didn't respond to me. It wasn't until a couple years ago I was telling him this and he said he had no clue it was supposed to mean that.

Don't know where I ever got the notion.....I guess I should have let him know about " the signal"
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Old 08-16-2007, 03:58 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shiane
Yep, most women use subtle hints.

Women are like your VCR, just about the time you think you've got her programmed, the electricity goes off and you have to start all over. The only problem is women don't come with an instruction book, but we should lol.

Men however are like picture books, what you see if what you get. Men have very basic needs.... sex, food, and more sex. If they have all of those, they are typically pretty content.
SHIANE: Please be careful not to place all MEN in the same boat. If you are talking of primary basic men, perhaps they have basic needs like sex and food and that it's.
I am surprised at you that you could generalise that simple way.
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Old 08-16-2007, 04:11 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by SirFox
SHIANE: Please be careful not to place all MEN in the same boat. If you are talking of primary basic men, perhaps they have basic needs like sex and food and that it's.
I am surprised at you that you could generalise that simple way.
Well Foxy this is slick's boat, and I wasn't referring to YOU.

This was not a huge discussion on the many needs and differences of men and women. This was a quick answer about a discussion yesterday about how different men and women are when it comes to initiating sex, the complexity versus the simplicity.
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Old 08-16-2007, 04:19 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shiane
Well Foxy this is slick's boat, and I wasn't referring to YOU.

This was not a huge discussion on the many needs and differences of men and women. This was a quick answer about a discussion yesterday about how different men and women are when it comes to initiating sex, the complexity versus the simplicity.
Sweet Heart...I am glad you cleared that misunderstanding up. You know how much I treasure you... and I thought suddenly that my radar was ..well..off...

When you and I make love, remember all that eye contact, the kiss in the neck that I give you...and your fingers in my hair....Oh lala...just thinking about it again...well...you know...
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Old 08-17-2007, 04:54 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by SirFox
When you and I make love, remember all that eye contact, the kiss in the neck that I give you...and your fingers in my hair....Oh lala...just thinking about it again...well...you know...
ummmmm no, I don't remember.

The Fantasy thread is over there =========>
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Old 08-17-2007, 05:27 PM   #9
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I've the awareness of a twig. Everytime my wife gets the urge all she has to do look at me and I'm all over her. I often get it wrong...which annoys the crap outta her.
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Old 08-17-2007, 06:04 PM   #10
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I lost my man card awhile back, when I lost interest in my wife. She gets made at me for not wanting sex as much as she does. I don't have the heart to tell her that I just don't want to have sex with her, but I would take it from anyone else.
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Old 08-17-2007, 06:12 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by onceamarine
I lost my man card awhile back, when I lost interest in my wife. She gets made at me for not wanting sex as much as she does. I don't have the heart to tell her that I just don't want to have sex with her, but I would take it from anyone else.
This intrigues me, as there are a few women on here that don't understand why their men have lost interest in sex, ok there is the obvious bollocks, but why have you lost interest in your wife? I am not picking you out, ok I am a little as you seem pretty level-headed, and horses for courses an' all that... but I am interested.
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Old 08-17-2007, 06:24 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by pragmaticJenny
This intrigues me, as there are a few women on here that don't understand why their men have lost interest in sex, ok there is the obvious bollocks, but why have you lost interest in your wife? I am not picking you out, ok I am a little as you seem pretty level-headed, and horses for courses an' all that... but I am interested.
It isn't that my wife is unattractive, although she could exercise a little more. I think it is because she is not very adventurous. Aside from the occasional bj, sex is kind of boring with her. I like to make sure that we don't just stop when I climax, to make sure she gets taken care of too. But, that takes longer these days, and some nights I think to myself that it would be faster if I just masturbated and went to sleep. If she was a little more exciting to be with, and would try new things, I am sure I would think differently about sex with her.

This may not answer your question at all, but its what came to my mind.
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Old 08-17-2007, 06:28 PM   #13
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Hey Lonely1in maine...welcome. Enjoy...
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Old 08-17-2007, 06:32 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by onceamarine
It isn't that my wife is unattractive, although she could exercise a little more. I think it is because she is not very adventurous. Aside from the occasional bj, sex is kind of boring with her. I like to make sure that we don't just stop when I climax, to make sure she gets taken care of too. But, that takes longer these days, and some nights I think to myself that it would be faster if I just masturbated and went to sleep. If she was a little more exciting to be with, and would try new things, I am sure I would think differently about sex with her.

This may not answer your question at all, but its what came to my mind.
No no I appreciate you being so candid! I am going be a completely boring now and ask the ultimate question; "Good lovers are made, not born." so if you truly wanted your sexual relationship with your wife to be all that it can be, do you talk about your expectations, your desires etc etc...
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Old 08-17-2007, 06:37 PM   #15
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PS> However, you can also say sod off you nosey cow!!

Last edited by pragmaticJenny; 08-17-2007 at 06:58 PM.
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Old 08-18-2007, 03:55 PM   #16
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No no I appreciate you being so candid! I am going be a completely boring now and ask the ultimate question; "Good lovers are made, not born." so if you truly wanted your sexual relationship with your wife to be all that it can be, do you talk about your expectations, your desires etc etc...
I tried discussing this with her a couple of years ago, when I first started having these feelings. She got embarrassed by the whole conversation. It did lead to her initiating sex more, but the only thing new she would try pertained to her clothing. I am not saying I have no blame here either. I am sure that my porn intake doesn't help the situation much, because I know I will never get her to do some of the things I see in the porn.
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Old 08-18-2007, 03:58 PM   #17
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PS> However, you can also say sod off you nosey cow!!
LOL...I absolutely love the "true" English language. And Jenny always has a way with words.
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Old 08-18-2007, 04:34 PM   #18
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I would always try and make it simple. I usually wear pants or boxers and a tank top to bed. So, when I would come walking out of the room with only thongs or lingere on he would usually get the hint.....
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Old 08-18-2007, 04:52 PM   #19
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Originally Posted by onceamarine
It isn't that my wife is unattractive, although she could exercise a little more. I think it is because she is not very adventurous. Aside from the occasional bj, sex is kind of boring with her. I like to make sure that we don't just stop when I climax, to make sure she gets taken care of too. But, that takes longer these days, and some nights I think to myself that it would be faster if I just masturbated and went to sleep. If she was a little more exciting to be with, and would try new things, I am sure I would think differently about sex with her.

This may not answer your question at all, but its what came to my mind.

.... will venture where no man has gone before. Yep, that's me .... sorry if this doesn't work.

But, I'm curious -- I get the sense that sex, for you, is all about mechanics (an overdose of porn will do that to you). Of course it's boring .... it's the same ol' think all the time. I guess your phrase ".. would be faster if I just masturbated and went to sleep" led me to believe it's all about getting to the climax.

Forget sex for a minute -- how's the romance surrounding it? Is it nice, is it stimulating, is it enticing, or is it "Well, the news is over. Let's go to bed. We gonna fuck tonight?" As you say, "... to make sure she gets taken care of too" I get the sense you think that's a task rather than a joy. You say it seems to take her longer --- ever think about why that is?

I dunno -- I just get the sense that she's doing you a favor, rather than wanting it -- and that might be your fault.
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Old 08-19-2007, 04:43 AM   #20
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I would always try and make it simple. I usually wear pants or boxers and a tank top to bed. So, when I would come walking out of the room with only thongs or lingere on he would usually get the hint.....
You could be wearing a wearing a suit of armor and you!d be sexy to me, baby, and I'd get you out of that thing so I could ravish you. Nothing is more simpler than "Mighty is sexy and I want her BAD".
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Old 08-19-2007, 06:01 PM   #21
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Well, unlike many of the women who have posted here, I'm not very subtle when it comes to initiating sex. I'm discreet about it if we're out in public, but if we're home, I just come right out and ask, or get things started.

Yes, sometimes he says no - sometimes he's too tired, or too stressed, or whatever, but so what? Not all of us feel like having sex all day, every day. (well, I do, but that's another story...)
Guys don't lose their "man card" just because they say no to sex once in a while. Men are human, not fucking machines, ready to spring into action any time of the day.
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Old 08-19-2007, 06:16 PM   #22
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Well spoken, Jazzy. There is that one-tenth of our brain that isn't fixated on you know what... ha ha... but, really, thanks for speaking up for us. It means a lot more coming from an desirous and intelligent female.
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Old 08-19-2007, 06:48 PM   #23
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Well spoken, Jazzy. There is that one-tenth of our brain that isn't fixated on you know what... ha ha... but, really, thanks for speaking up for us. It means a lot more coming from an desirous and intelligent female.
HERO: JAZZY is one of the exceptional ladies of the Site who mixes beauty and intelligence.
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Old 08-19-2007, 06:51 PM   #24
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HERO: JAZZY is one of the exceptional ladies of the Site who mixes beauty and intelligence.
Oh, and what a potent combination that is! Truly intoxicating...
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Old 08-20-2007, 04:11 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by spare_change
.... will venture where no man has gone before. Yep, that's me .... sorry if this doesn't work.

But, I'm curious -- I get the sense that sex, for you, is all about mechanics (an overdose of porn will do that to you). Of course it's boring .... it's the same ol' think all the time. I guess your phrase ".. would be faster if I just masturbated and went to sleep" led me to believe it's all about getting to the climax.

Forget sex for a minute -- how's the romance surrounding it? Is it nice, is it stimulating, is it enticing, or is it "Well, the news is over. Let's go to bed. We gonna fuck tonight?" As you say, "... to make sure she gets taken care of too" I get the sense you think that's a task rather than a joy. You say it seems to take her longer --- ever think about why that is?

I dunno -- I just get the sense that she's doing you a favor, rather than wanting it -- and that might be your fault.
You make good points, and I am quite certain that I can be blamed as well. It does take two for us make love. And like I said, it is usually me that doesn't want to do it. Perhaps I do need to focus more on the romance part of it, rather than the sex aspect. That seems to be harder these days with a 2 year old running rampant. I appreciate your input.
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