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|05-08-2015, 12:49 AM||#1|
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Greatest place on earth
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50 things chicks think about while giving a blow job
just read this... Made me laugh
50 Things I Think About While Going Down On A Man
When men go down on women, itís called eating out.
Who doesnít love going out to eat, right? When you were a kid, going out to eat was such treat. No wonder men like going down on women so much ó itís just like another Pizza Hut to them.
Instead of calling blowjobs jobs, why donít we call it something more exciting? Like Blow Happy Hour or Blow Brunch? Who doesnít love going to brunch? Every women loves going to brunch!
ďIím about to go to brunch on this man.Ē
It already sounds so much more fun.
Itís not that I donít like going down on a man; it can always be fun and sexy to turn someone on, and blowjobs are a big part of foreplay. Itís just that sometimes, going down on a man can get very tedious and my ADD mind tends to wander.
Here are the 50 things that definitely go through my head while going down on a man:
1. Alright, I got this!
2. Youíre about to rock his world.
3. Breathe through your nose, idiot.
4. I hope my throat wonít hurt tomorrow.
5. Should I try butt stuff? Maybe heíll like it. No, Kristin! Donít do it.
6. I will never understand this hand thing.
7. Is it supposed to be a lollipop or Popsicle stick?
8. If you touch my head one more time, Iím going to f*cking kill you.
9. Should I make eye contact?
10. Pretty sure itís like a Popsicle.
11. Ugh, just cum already.
12. I have so much hair. I wish I had a hair tie.
13. Just maybe try butt stuff?
14. Make some noise, Kristin.
15. Well, that was weird.
16. Jesus, Kristin, be careful of teeth.
17. Do you think he felt that?
18. Just because you can deep throat doesnít mean that ó
20. Ew, our parents totally used give blowjobs.
21. Maybe they still do?
22. Ew, get that out of your mind.
23 Ah, so much hair.
24. Okay, here it goes. Iím going to try some butt ó
25. NOPE, NOPE. WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? GO BACK UP!
26. You can try to finger his butt, but you cant ask him to go on a date with you? What is wrong with you?
27. Oh god, why is this still happening to me ?
28. Aw, I canít believe my cat Fluffy died. RIP.
29. Who was the first person to ever do this?
30. ďTurn around, every now and then I get a little bitÖ Total eclipse of the heartÖĒ
31. I think I have to pee.
32. Oh, right. My hand.
33. Heís making weird noises, so this canít suck.
34. It probably sucks.
35. Haha, sucks.
36. Okay, Iím over this.
37. He better go down on me this long.
38. I wish I had a dick.
39. When can women stop giving blowjobs?
40. ďTurn around, bright eyes. Every now and then I fall apartÖĒ
41. I wonder if he is in love with me yet?
42. I better be getting breakfast in the morning.
43. Look whoís ready to cum!
44. YES! Bring it on!
45. Where is it?
46. Oh God. Itís happening.
47. Just smile.
48. Good job, sport.
46. Well, now that thatís over, my turn!
50. Oh, now heís tired? Loser.
My Life is just a bunch of "It seemed like a good idea at the time" strung together.
|06-06-2015, 06:10 PM||#6|
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|12-03-2017, 10:57 PM||#7|
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Sometimes none, sometimes all
If we only have this moment, let's make it last
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Just A Girl (12-04-2017)
|12-04-2017, 12:30 AM||#8|
The Notorious J.A.G.
Join Date: Oct 2010
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Always number 8 and 11...and usually whining about my mouth getting tired
I know I'm a handful but that's why you got two hands...