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Everyday Life For Married Couples A forum for couples to chat about your everyday married life. This would be a good place for women and men to get to know eachother.

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Old 07-04-2011, 11:01 AM   #1
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Default It dawned on me today that....

I don't think we have a thread like this, to share those things that sometimes just hit you as go about the course of day to day life. So here it is!

It dawned on me today that happiness in a long term relationship can hinge on how in sync you and your partner are as to when each of you reaches your "breaking point" on when the house absolutely positively needs to be cleaned! I swear - this is one of the biggest hot buttons in my relationship. She reaches the boiling point far more quickly than I do, and as hilarious as that sounds, it really has been a major contributor to the wedge that has been driven between us over many years. She reaches her point and once there, everyone in the house needs to drop what they are doing, and the yelling and screaming starts. I think if I were an anal retentive neat freak, she'd actually like me better. And maybe vice versa (though I'd probably think she was a slob!).

What dawned on you today?
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Old 07-04-2011, 04:58 PM   #2
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Ha ha ha , i learned i have a neighbor lady who thinks im all that and a bag of chips , some people should NOT drink . I suspect she is regretting her comments by now . I found it rather embarrsing seems i was sober .

To make this confusing , last i knew she despised me or maybe thats her sober opinion .
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Old 07-04-2011, 05:39 PM   #3
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That eventually you really do run out of excuses
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Old 07-04-2011, 05:45 PM   #4
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It dawned on me that your love for someone doesn't just evaporate when you agree to part. That in your heart, even down to your soul, you are still connected to them. He feels sorrow, I feel sorrow. He feels joy when he's tossing his kid around, I feel happy. And, I wonder does it go the other direction? Or even happen to anyone else? Or is it just my misfortune to connect to people like this. Like they intertwine with who I am, how I feel, what I think. That they become part of the fabric of who I am.
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Old 07-04-2011, 05:52 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by katydid2 View Post
It dawned on me that your love for someone doesn't just evaporate when you agree to part. That in your heart, even down to your soul, you are still connected to them. He feels sorrow, I feel sorrow. He feels joy when he's tossing his kid around, I feel happy. And, I wonder does it go the other direction? Or even happen to anyone else? Or is it just my misfortune to connect to people like this. Like they intertwine with who I am, how I feel, what I think. That they become part of the fabric of who I am.
I don't think you're alone in that. An interesting image in them becoming part of the fabric of who you are. Like a big patchwork quilt that you wrap around yourself and keeps you warm and comfy. I wonder if somebody truly loves another if it will ever stop? I believe that I have loved only a few people in my life (at least outside family) and with each of them I still feel a connection. I may no longer like this person. Indeed I may no longer be able to be around them. But when I objectively examine my feelings for them - there is still love. At least a definition of love that includes compassion, concern and care (I do love my alliteration).
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Old 07-04-2011, 05:57 PM   #6
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I don't think you're alone in that. An interesting image in them becoming part of the fabric of who you are. Like a big patchwork quilt that you wrap around yourself and keeps you warm and comfy. I wonder if somebody truly loves another if it will ever stop? I believe that I have loved only a few people in my life (at least outside family) and with each of them I still feel a connection. I may no longer like this person. Indeed I may no longer be able to be around them. But when I objectively examine my feelings for them - there is still love. At least a definition of love that includes compassion, concern and care (I do love my alliteration).
I thought quilt too. Or maybe an intricate tapestry whose beauty is missed until it's done. I imagine part of that work of a lifetime includes our sorrows and disappointments too. And, it becomes a part of it somehow. So that it is even stronger and more beautiful. Like you I've only loved a few people. And, I loved all of them for different reasons. But, they all touched my heart. Became tied to me with silver threads. How can that just disappear? Thanks for sharing so I know I'm not alone.

P.S. I liked your alliteration. Very much.
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Old 07-06-2011, 07:30 AM   #7
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It dawned on me today is Wednesday and my Friday. My days are screwed up from the holiday.
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Old 07-06-2011, 07:45 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by katydid2 View Post
It dawned on me that your love for someone doesn't just evaporate when you agree to part. That in your heart, even down to your soul, you are still connected to them. He feels sorrow, I feel sorrow. He feels joy when he's tossing his kid around, I feel happy. And, I wonder does it go the other direction? Or even happen to anyone else? Or is it just my misfortune to connect to people like this. Like they intertwine with who I am, how I feel, what I think. That they become part of the fabric of who I am.
I think for some people, you only really connect with people who were already part of who you are, in a way. And I've retyped this three times, but the words aren't quite there.
As if you're both magnets- the pull, the field, is there, but it takes proximity to make you aware of it. Or like a key that unlocks part of you that was always there, but you couldn't fully access.

but it's the poetic, romantic geek stuff that really gets me
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/80...le-scientists/

Of all the weirdness in the universe, the quantum mechanics phenomenon called “entanglement” may be the most mind-boggling. Physicists have long shaken their heads at the theory that two particles that become entangled will always and instantly mirror each other’s properties, no matter how far they are separated, which seems to go against all other physical understanding.
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Old 07-06-2011, 08:00 AM   #9
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It dawned on me today that some people never grow out of the petty bitchy drama thing.
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Old 07-06-2011, 09:13 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TomIAm View Post
I don't think we have a thread like this, to share those things that sometimes just hit you as go about the course of day to day life. So here it is!

It dawned on me today that happiness in a long term relationship can hinge on how in sync you and your partner are as to when each of you reaches your "breaking point" on when the house absolutely positively needs to be cleaned! I swear - this is one of the biggest hot buttons in my relationship. She reaches the boiling point far more quickly than I do, and as hilarious as that sounds, it really has been a major contributor to the wedge that has been driven between us over many years. She reaches her point and once there, everyone in the house needs to drop what they are doing, and the yelling and screaming starts. I think if I were an anal retentive neat freak, she'd actually like me better. And maybe vice versa (though I'd probably think she was a slob!).

What dawned on you today?
omg, i get just like your wife! the yelling and screaming works though. once every three months you could stand to do a little something around here!
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Old 07-06-2011, 09:35 AM   #11
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...no only I alone benefits of my morning workouts, the difference in mood is very apparent when I don't...
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Old 07-06-2011, 10:25 AM   #12
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I need to listen to that voice inside of me that tells me what's right. It is quiet and steady because it comes from way deep within. The part of me that simply knows. We all have a deep, inner wisdom that comes from life's experiences, but we don't always listen to it.
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Old 07-06-2011, 10:29 AM   #13
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I've been blessed with two healthly kids and I have nothing to complain about
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Old 07-06-2011, 10:34 AM   #14
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.... holidays are awaited for because we get tired and stressed out and once on holiday, we try to pack it full of activities and in the end, go back to work as tired as we were!
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Old 07-21-2011, 07:52 AM   #15
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..........that he will never be mine...
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Old 07-21-2011, 08:07 AM   #16
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true friends have the ability to separate their own sense or morality and ethics in a way that makes it possible for them to be there for you. That a true friend can be there for you even if you act contrary to what THEY think is best or honorable or even least likely to cause you heartache. That they can let their opinions/concerns be heard and then move on to loving you and supporting you. I guess it IS really hard to be a true friend. But, not impossible. I've certainly been friends with those who have acted contrary to what I thought was "right". It never occurred to me that friendship is contingent on our ethics, morality, decision making be in alignment at all times.
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Old 07-21-2011, 10:22 AM   #17
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all you can do is your best.
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Old 10-16-2011, 12:57 PM   #18
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There were long stretches of time were I wanted to be somebody. What did I found out?
That I already was somebody it just wasn't the person that I envisioned myself as. And that was the mistake. I expected to be someone I wasn't. When I accepted who I really was then things fell in place and the anxiety and frustration left.
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Old 10-16-2011, 01:13 PM   #19
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it dawned on me today that I am really running out of time to pack and need to get off of this site and get some work done
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Old 10-16-2011, 01:14 PM   #20
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....truly free thinkers don't bother me. Zombies do.
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Old 10-16-2011, 06:17 PM   #21
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it dawned on me today that someone was right... I do have a way of putting men off of me... both online and offline... god I am so good at it too
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Old 10-16-2011, 08:57 PM   #22
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I thought I knew what I was looking for and now I'm not really sure.
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Old 10-16-2011, 08:59 PM   #23
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I need some playtime...
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Old 10-16-2011, 09:09 PM   #24
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that he really does care..
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Old 10-16-2011, 09:18 PM   #25
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...tomorrow is Monday and I am actually looking forward to it.
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