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What is intimacy to you? - Page 2 - Married And Flirting Chat
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Everyday Life For Married Couples A forum for couples to chat about your everyday married life. This would be a good place for women and men to get to know eachother.

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Old 09-14-2009, 08:26 PM   #26
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it's lieing in bed and holding hands just watching tv or reading a book.
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:23 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by Tempest View Post
For me, intimacy represents what is missing in my marriage right now. Sitting close when you're on the couch; checking in throughout the day (just once) to see how you are; the easy communication; a hug just because; cooking together. The sense that you are a unit, not just two people co-existing. The thing that joins you...
That seems to be my problem. We co-exist together. It works very well, But there is no passion or flame anymore. I'm in no hurry to get home at the end of the day, If you know what I mean, The marriage seems somewhat one sided when it comes to giving affection. My family tells me she is selfish. However she does cook, clean, and does the laundry. Not sure what to do with her. I think that a lot of men are hostages in marriages because they work so hard and have too much to lose. I meet nice women everywhere, But none of them wants a married guy.
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:30 PM   #28
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staring into her eyes, brushing her hair off her face, tracing her lips with my finger, caressing her cheek, holding hands and telling her how much I adore her!
Now that's what I'm talkin about! Someone you can really cherish and can't wait to come home to at the end of the day. Someone you can dress up and take to a dinner or a party and not be embarrassed by.
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:35 PM   #29
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Now that's what I'm talkin about! Someone you can really cherish and can't wait to come home to at the end of the day. Someone you can dress up and take to a dinner or a party and not be embarrassed by.
If you love and are intimate with someone, why or how, could they embarrass you? Being proud of them is part of the intimacy!
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:35 PM   #30
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When you can gripe about family and friends to her and know that she won't repeat it.

When neither of you gripe about the others faults and annoyances to family or friends.

When you make a ridiculous statement in a room full of people and she is the only one that laughs.

When she understands you better than your own parents.

When she comes to you for that same understanding.

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Old 09-17-2009, 10:47 PM   #31
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If you love and are intimate with someone, why or how, could they embarrass you? Being proud of them is part of the intimacy!
My point exactly. Maybe I am no longer in love and don't realize it. Maybe someday I will have a REAL relationship.
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Old 09-18-2009, 12:07 AM   #32
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To me, intimacy is those moments that seem suspended in time. Where nothing else exists beyond you and your partner. These can occur at anytime- whether it be those silly 5 in the morning conversations or when you look at each other from across a crowded room, after passionate lovemaking or even just sitting on the couch laughing together at something on the t.v. These moments are just as important in the survival of any relationship as physical intimacy. In the end, if you last long enough-they will be all you can share anyway.
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Old 09-18-2009, 11:00 AM   #33
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when 2 people find that they really connect...not just sex wise but can enjoy just being together and talking and joking with each other!
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Old 09-18-2009, 12:15 PM   #34
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Well, itís hard for one to say when their intimacy has been broken; casting doubts over what they thought they knew, but I'll give it a go...I think intimacy is actually better described by what it is not, but thatís not very positive...sooo...

For me, intimacy is an over-powering dependency that entwines you both equally, yet doesnít forget your mutual individuality, self-efficacy, self-importance. Itís knowing what your lover needs and what they canít live without, knowing whatís in their best interests when they do not. Itís being transparent about your love; doing things with open motives or ďjust becauseĒ.

Intimacy is an intense fascination with each other, causing one to want to experiment, push the boundaries, and reveal whatís under the layers. Itís finding out everything that makes someone tick - discovering the things they werenít even aware of themselves. Itís letting one's guard down; showing another your inner-most thoughts, fears, weaknesses...and allowing yourself to be nurtured, influenced, taught, cherished. It's never pushing someone away, and always being proud to be with them - acknowledging to others what they mean to you.

Intimacy is spontaneous thought; itís spontaneous everything! Itís no hesitations at what youíre willing to share Ė from food and clothing to the devious desires and fantasies you could only ever have with that person. It might be two people who canít resist each other, they would ignore the risks and complications just to feel together again.

Itís trust, commitment and respect Ė the pinnacles of every loving relationship.

And a sense of infinity Ė that you will feel this way forever and youíre certain about that.
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Old 09-18-2009, 02:26 PM   #35
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Well, itís hard for one to say when their intimacy has been broken; casting doubts over what they thought they knew, but I'll give it a go...I think intimacy is actually better described by what it is not, but thatís not very positive...sooo...

For me, intimacy is an over-powering dependency that entwines you both equally, yet doesnít forget your mutual individuality, self-efficacy, self-importance. Itís knowing what your lover needs and what they canít live without, knowing whatís in their best interests when they do not. Itís being transparent about your love; doing things with open motives or ďjust becauseĒ.

Intimacy is an intense fascination with each other, causing one to want to experiment, push the boundaries, and reveal whatís under the layers. Itís finding out everything that makes someone tick - discovering the things they werenít even aware of themselves. Itís letting one's guard down; showing another your inner-most thoughts, fears, weaknesses...and allowing yourself to be nurtured, influenced, taught, cherished. It's never pushing someone away, and always being proud to be with them - acknowledging to others what they mean to you.

Intimacy is spontaneous thought; itís spontaneous everything! Itís no hesitations at what youíre willing to share Ė from food and clothing to the devious desires and fantasies you could only ever have with that person. It might be two people who canít resist each other, they would ignore the risks and complications just to feel together again.

Itís trust, commitment and respect Ė the pinnacles of every loving relationship.

And a sense of infinity Ė that you will feel this way forever and youíre certain about that.
Yes!
Well said.... I came here today to say just that...I think you have said it better than I ever could so I will just say... WELL SAID!
To me that is what love is supposed to be like...
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Old 09-18-2009, 02:55 PM   #36
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I did a really silly thing, I googled the word. And I found where it said, total life sharing, not just physical, emotional, spiritual, mentally.... it kind of clicked, not that I had no clue what it meant. But, it evolved for me.

It is never worrying that your partner will not want to hear your thoughts, ideas. Never being afraid that you are being too silly or embarrassing. Never holding back. How wonderful would that feeling be, never holding anything in, saying it and not having it held against you. I am not talking about hurtful words, just opinions or even putting your foot in your mouth sometimes and knowing forgiveness or understanding it right there within reach.

Sharing dreams, encouraging them. Knowing when one or the other has something on their mind, is upset or just needs a hug.

Intimacy is very complex and yet simple too. It is whatever it is to the people experiencing it, there is no defining context. Just a place to grow and flourish.
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Old 09-21-2009, 04:22 PM   #37
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For me, intimacy means feeling completely at ease with someone, letting them see every facet of the real you. It means you can let your guard down and let them in, no acting, no embellishing to make you look better, just being yourself knowing you are loved for who you are.
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Old 09-21-2009, 04:24 PM   #38
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a word that i could not spell without spell check intammysee
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Old 09-21-2009, 04:24 PM   #39
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here sucking nipples ever so slightly, running here hands up and down my legs, kissing sucking my neck. Then climbing on top for a long slow ride.
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Old 09-21-2009, 09:03 PM   #40
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Laying together in bed after making love, holding hands, and talking forever about nothing of any real consequence
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Old 09-21-2009, 09:04 PM   #41
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Intimacy to me is looking across a crowded room...meeting his eyes and knowing exactly what he is thinking
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Old 09-21-2009, 09:10 PM   #42
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Intimacy to me is looking across a crowded room...meeting his eyes and knowing exactly what he is thinking
I agree Disturbia...

To me...it is also sharing your deepest feelings and secrets....
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Old 04-29-2010, 11:37 PM   #43
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To me, intimacy is being able to caress her face with my hand - tracing out every curve, lightly brushing her skin with my lips and gently breathing/nibbling, holding her body close as I adore the feel of her skin under my fingertips ...
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Old 04-29-2010, 11:44 PM   #44
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sharing inner most thoughts and things you always wanted to do.. but didn't....
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Old 04-30-2010, 12:18 AM   #45
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When you're with her you don't need to be anything .. but just to be. Longing to be ever closer, and never close enough.
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Old 04-30-2010, 12:19 AM   #46
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Intimacy to me has always been sexual. I admit it! When he touches me I go there in my head. I have a hard time with casual touch because in my head I always go further. So intimacy to me is being touched and kissed and hugged by him and then whether or not we go further which rarely we do its making love in one way or another.

I have to admit also that because of my ways he has had a hard time in our relationship living up to my sexual expectations. I learned early in our marriage when I was very young to compromise and take what is given to me greatfully. I guess for me intimacy is with the man I am with sexually. Jeez no wonder I am messed up! LOL
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Old 04-30-2010, 12:57 AM   #47
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Intimacy for me goes beyond sex... it is being able to let someone in and being open and honest with them...having a deep and meaningful connection with that person. Being able to depend on each other for emotional support and being satisfied and completely comfortable with that person ...It is an enduring bond that gives you the warm and tinglies all over...but hey dont listen to me..I am so not the person to give advice on this topic.
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Old 04-30-2010, 01:10 AM   #48
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Intimacy for me goes beyond sex... it is being able to let someone in and being open and honest with them...having a deep and meaningful connection with that person. Being able to depend on each other for emotional support and being satisfied and completely comfortable with that person ...It is an enduring bond that gives you the warm and tinglies all over...but hey dont listen to me..I am so not the person to give advice on this topic.

Raina...girl great answer...its funny though I never think of intimacy that way and yet I have or have had it! LOL
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Old 04-30-2010, 03:14 AM   #49
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This is a questions that really made me thing and I've enjoyed the answers.

For me, I think, it is kind of a cocktail or things, it involves not having to hide any part or yourself for fear that it isn't acceptable. Trusting them totally to 'have your back'. Knowing what they need and making sure they have it and knowing that they do that for you. Being seen completely and accepted as you are.

All this manifests in not having to fuss about dressing things up or yourself, and yet wanting to make things nice for them. We used to love to 'just drive' with no particular place to go, just to talk and to hang and see what we could discover. Somehow, it was our place tp talk things through, share and connect. We could drive for ages in perfect silence, and then be pitched into deep conversation and both were wonderful.

Another facet is being inside each others minds, effortlessly. Also, for us, regularly reaching out, just to touch each other.
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Old 04-30-2010, 04:17 AM   #50
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Being so comfortable with her i can easily fall asleep on the couch in her arms.
I know you posted this before we ever met... but I want everyone to know... that I love you.. and I enjoy what we call intimacy...

that intimacy is being able to be yourself around someone.. to crack stupid jokes... without worrying that they won't find you funny... it's meeting someone and sharing an afternoon in an Optometrists office lounge talking and getting to know each other... intimacy is when your daughter (who works there) tells you later that watching the two of you was like watching a love story unfolding... intimacy is in the look you give one another.. not just lust.. but more... more then even love.. it's all in that look according to my daughter... intimacy is falling asleep in his arms after staying awake all night.. and feeling comfortable and safe... intimacy is sharing your innermost thoughts whenever they occur... and intimacy is that touch.. the touch that sends shivers up and down your skin... shivers of ecstacy... intimacy is knowing... without having to be told.. what they are thinking... and knowing without a doubt.. that you found the one..
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